- Mike Nelson: [as Doc scampers back to the camp] Okay, knees bent, butt protruded, stomach all pooched out... good.
- [regarding the Boggy Creek creatures]
- Doc: [narrating] Although they appear to be docile and have never intentionally harmed anyone...
- Tom Servo: [as Doc] They do anyway.
- Doc: One of the things Trooper Williams failed to mention was the foul odor the creature emitted, which was still present in the surrounding area.
- Mike Nelson: [as Doc Lockhart] In fact, everywhere we went there was a foul odor. He must have *just been* every place we looked!
- [upon seeing the film's title]
- Tom Servo: And the legend continues... to be not heard about, by anyone.
- Doc: The believability of the sightings along Boggy Creek are rated very high.
- Crow T. Robot: By J.D. Power.
- Mike Nelson: [Mike and Bots see the creature] Ted Nugent?
- Crow T. Robot: Slash?
- Tom Servo: Rob Zombie?
- Mike Nelson: Cher?
- Tom Servo: Yeah, Cher.