Northern Exposure (TV Series)

Animals R Us (1991)

Rob Morrow: Dr. Joel Fleischman

Quotes 

• Dr. Joel Fleischman : [about the dog Maggie has just met]  You asked the dog whether or not he was Rick?

  Maggie O'Connell : Well, yeah. I said, "If you're Rick, bark three times."

  Shelly Marie Tambo : Did he?

  Maggie O'Connell : Mm-hmm.

  Dr. Joel Fleischman : This dog is-is not Rick. People do not become dogs when they die. Dogs are dogs. People are people. That's it, end of story.

  Shelly Marie Tambo : He does sort of look like Rick, in a way.

  Dr. Joel Fleischman : Why are you people fostering this delusion? It's such a patently obvious pathology. She's displacing the guilt and grief she feels over the death of Rick... by anthropomorphizing a-a mutt.

  Chris Stevens : Well, Joel, you know, certain belief systems... still embrace the concept of reincarnation. Buddhism, Hindu, Chippewa.

  Shelly Marie Tambo : Hey, Ed, you're an Indian. Is this Rick?

  Ed Chigliak : Oh, I don't know, but if Rick was to come back as a dog, I think he'd be a terrier.

  Dr. Joel Fleischman : Okay, look. The dog is not Rick. - I'm stating categorically and in no uncertain terms as a scientist... and as a human being, no dog can come back to Earth and be Rick.

• Maggie O'Connell : [as Joel notices the absence of "Rick," or rather, Butch]  Oh, Fleischman, you can come out. The pooch is gone.

  Dr. Joel Fleischman : Gone? Really? Where'd he go?

  Maggie O'Connell : Well, if you must know, his owner came and got him. And I don't wanna hear any jokes about it.

  Dr. Joel Fleischman : Oh, okay. I'm sorry.

  Maggie O'Connell : Too bad you missed her. She was really attractive.

  Dr. Joel Fleischman : Well, Rick always did have an eye for the ladies.

  Maggie O'Connell : Okay, Fleischman. Maybe you're right, and I know how important it is for you to be right about everything. Maybe I did have some leftover things to work out about Rick, and maybe I did work them out with a dog, but so what? But, for your information-you skeptical, rational, empirical know-it-all- the dog was Rick.

  Dr. Joel Fleischman : You're right. What do I know?