Peep Show (TV Series)

Sectioning (2005)

David Mitchell: Mark Corrigan

Quotes 

• Mark Corrigan : So, the pub. What are you calling it?

  Jeremy Usborne : No problem there. I mean, we're deadlocked on that, and a few other things, but I'm definitely not co-managing a pub called "Free the Paedos".

• Jeremy Usborne : Just imagine, me in the pub all day, but no one can say a thing because it's my job and I've got to be there. I'll literally get paid to go to the pub.

  Mark Corrigan : Yeah, I mean, I guess it won't be quite like being paid just to go to the pub because you'll be doing all the pub stuff, the barrels, the tubes, the debit card authorisations.

  Jeremy Usborne : Mark, do you have to live quite so relentlessly in the real world?

• Mark Corrigan : [voiceover]  It would sort of suit me to have a girlfriend in an institution. Regulated meeting times. I might get to have a say in her medication. I'd like to be able to chemically alter my girlfriend's moods.

• Mark Corrigan : Have you done your market research?

  Jeremy Usborne : Market research? If you build it, they will come, that's my market research.

  Mark Corrigan : Your market research is Field of Dreams? I mean, a man who made a baseball pitch in his garden for ghosts, that's your role model?

• Mark Corrigan : [voiceover]  Nothing happened really. The three least comforting words in the English language.

• [at a fairground] 

  Sophie Chapman : So, what next?

  Mark Corrigan : Well, they all look garish and unsafe so why don't you choose?

• [Merry is acting a bit strange] 

  Merry : Ohh, Mark. You've turned into quite a hunk, haven't you? You're a hunky.

  Mark Corrigan : Well, uh, actually it may surprise you to learn that no one's ever said that to me before.

  Merry : You want to put your popsicle into my purse?

  Mark Corrigan : [voiceover]  Oh my God, I'm being propositioned.

  Merry : I wrote you a letter, I didn't send it, but I don't know if you...

  [she gets a letter from the mantelpiece and hands it to him] 

  Mark Corrigan : [voiceover]  Letter? Popsicle? This isn't good.

  [to Merry] 

  Mark Corrigan : Right. Thank you.

  Merry : You know, my bone's got a little machine.

  Mark Corrigan : Does it? Really?

  Merry : OK, I'm just gonna go to the bathroom.

  Mark Corrigan : [voiceover]  Maybe I should follow her, she's so hyper she's probably really great at sex. But there's always the chance I'll get the toilet seat slammed on my cock for no reason.