Queer as Folk (TV Series)
Premiere (2000)
Michelle Clunie: Melanie Marcus
Quotes
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Lindsay 'Linz' Peterson : We've been thinking of names. Mel wants to call him Abraham after her grandfather, but I like Gus.
[Brian looks at his son, then over to Justin.]
Brian : What do you think?
Justin : You wouldn't survive a day in school being named Abraham, but I guess Gus is okay.
Melanie 'Mel' Marcus : Thank you very much, and who the hell are you?
Brian : His name's... Juh...
Michael Novotny : Justin.
Brian : You were on the phone when he shot his load all over me.
Lesbians In The Room : Ugh...
Lindsay 'Linz' Peterson : Oh, Brian!
Brian : He can't help it. He's only seventeen.
Melanie 'Mel' Marcus : So you and Lindsay each had an infant tonight.
Brian : But mine doesn't suck on my tits, unless I want him to.
[looking back at Gus]
Brian : Gus! It's a good butch name. Come on Gus; give your daddy a smile.
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Lindsay 'Linz' Peterson : Want to hold him?
[Brian approaches the baby, holding him.]
Melanie 'Mel' Marcus : Ca... Careful! Don't drop him.
Brian : That is just what I was planning on doing.
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Melanie 'Mel' Marcus : [on answering machine tape] Where the hell are you? I've been trying your cell. It's turned off. If you're there, pick up. Brian. Listen, Lindsay's water broke. She's having contractions. We're at the hospital.
Brian : [quick-pan to Brian as he stands bolt-upright.] Fuck! I have a baby.
Justin : [in the bathroom] Ouch!
Brian : Two babies.
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Brian Kinney : A million dollars?
Melanie 'Mel' Marcus : That's the general idea.
Brian Kinney : A million fucking dollars?
Lindsay 'Linz' Peterson : Brian, please? You'll wake the baby.
Brian Kinney : Well the answer is no. Definitely not.
Melanie 'Mel' Marcus : I don't understand the problem. I mean, Lindsay told me you offered to help support him.
Lindsay 'Linz' Peterson : It was very generous.
Brian Kinney : Well that's different than a life insurance policy.
Melanie 'Mel' Marcus : It's simply in case something happens to you.
Brian Kinney : Like I'm decapitated on a railroad crossing? Or burned beyond recognition in some gas explosion? You know, I can just imagine the grisly deaths you've conjured up for me.
Melanie 'Mel' Marcus : Like in case you get sick.
Brian Kinney : [pausing] ...Ah. Even better.
Melanie 'Mel' Marcus : Considering your life. When's the last time you're tested.
Brian Kinney : Six months ago! I was negative.
Melanie 'Mel' Marcus : That's twenty-six weeks and a hundred and eighty-two one-night stands.
Brian Kinney : You know I've always admired people who can multiply in their heads. And I'm always careful.
Lindsay 'Linz' Peterson : Look, this isn't for us. It's for our son. We need to make sure he'll be provided for.
Brian Kinney : And all I have to do is die.
Melanie 'Mel' Marcus : Hopefully, not before you sign these papers.
[smug-smiling at Brian]