Demond Wilson: Lamont Sanford

Quotes 

• Lamont Sanford : [Lamont speaking with his hypochondriac father notices the book beside him in bed]  Hey, wait a minute, what's that? Don't tell me that's a Bible?

  Fred G. Sanford : What'd you think it is? What's wrong with that?

  Lamont Sanford : Nothing. It's just I ain't never seen you so close to one before.

  Fred G. Sanford : I ain't never felt this close to the one who wrote it before.

• Fred G. Sanford : Why you smilin' at me like Bela Lugosi?

  Lamont Sanford : Well, can't I smile at my own father?

• Doctor Stewart : [Referring to what was wrong with Fred]  It appears he ate some 8-day-old collared greens, and they didn't agree with him.

  Lamont Sanford : Eight-day-old collared greens wouldn't agree with Superman!