The Simpsons (TV Series)
The Frying Game (2002)
Hank Azaria: Carl, Moe Szyslak, EPA Man, Old Jewish Guy, Chief Wiggum, Lou, Cletus, Foreman, Warden, John Coffey, Announcer
Quotes
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John Coffey : [Homer is on the walk to the Chair] Give me your hands, boss.
[Homer smiles and gives Coffey his hands]
John Coffey : I'm going to kill you! I killed those other people, and I'm going to kill you too!
[the guards hustle Homer away. John Coffey turns to his pet mouse and smiles]
John Coffey : Would you like some cornbread, Mr. Jingles? Well, you're not going to get any, 'cos I'm going to kill you!
[Mr Jingles flinches]
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Moe Szyslak : We've all got that voice in our heads telling us to kill, ya just have to... drown it out.
[sings to himself]
Moe Szyslak : I've been workin' on the railroad, all the live-long day...
Moe Szyslak : Hah! Yeah, that's better.
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Homer : [accidentally squishing the screamapillar] Oh, no! I crushed that horrible bug. What should I do?
[his shoulder devil appears]
Homer : Bury it quickly, before anyone finds out.
[his shoulder angel appears]
Homer : Ooh, I'm gonna tell.
[devil]
Homer : The hell you will!
[he throws his trident at the angel, killing him]
Homer : Now we're in it together. There's no going back.
[he and Homer high-five]
Homer : Yeah!
[as Homer buries the animal, a helicopter appears]
EPA Man : Stop what you're doing. Why don't I hear any screaming?
Homer : Uh, he's sleeping.
EPA Man : Then why don't I hear any sleep screams?
Homer : Well, uh, the thing about that is, uh...
[muffled screaming from the hole]
Homer : Whoo-hoo! He's alive!
[chuckling]
Homer : Now you can't punish me.
Judge Snyder : [in court] Homer Simpson, for attempted insecticide and aggravated buggery, I sentence you to 200 hours of community service.
Homer : D'oh!
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Homer : Meals on Wheels. Eat it up or I go to jail.
Old Jewish Guy : [seeing the dessert has been eaten] Didn't these meals used to have a cobbler?
Homer : Uh, they discontinued the cobbler.
Old Jewish Guy : [sniffing him] You smell like cobbler.
Homer : Now, let's not get into who smells like what.
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Homer : What the hell is that noise?
Lisa Simpson : That caterpillar is screaming.
Homer : [it continues to do so] Aw, the poor thing's in pain. What he needs is a visit from kindly old Dr. Foot.
EPA Man : Hold it right there, Dr. Foot. You're about to kill an endangered species, the screamapillar, which has chosen your yard as its home.
Homer : Fine, I won't kill it.
[whispering to Lisa]
Homer : Finish the job.
EPA Man : Mr. Simpson, allowing an endangered species to die is a federal offense under the Reversal of Freedoms Act of 1994. You are now legally responsible for the safety and well-being of this screamapillar. Everything you need to know is in this pamphlet.
Lisa Simpson : [taking it] "Screamapillar Care Tips." Wow, look at all this stuff. "Without constant reassurance, it will die. It's sexually attracted to fire..."
Homer : Are you sure God doesn't want it to be dead?
EPA Man : Hey, what's God's gonna do, make my wife leave me again?
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Homer : Guys, I just ordered my wife the greatest anniversary present. A koi pond.
Carl : A koi pond?
Moe : Yeah, a meditative lily pond with, big, beautiful fish that fry up really good.
Carl : Oh, that's the perfect gift.
Lenny : Yeah, you don't even have to feed the fish 'cause squirrels drown in it.
Carl : You got this husband thing down, Homer.
Lenny : Yeah, you must be some kind of marriage super-genius. How about a few tips?
Homer : Certainly, Lenford. Make every day a celebration of your love. Surprise her with a pasta salad. Put a mini-beret on your wang.
Lenny : [taking notes] Ooh, this stuff is gold.
Carl : Happy marriage, here I come.
Moe : Hmm. This will really help with my speed dating.
[leaving, then coming back a moment later]
Moe : I got 400 "nos".
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John Coffey : [Homer is on his way to death row and passes by John Coffey's cell] Gimme ya hands boss.
Homer : [Homer reaches out to John, but is strangled by him]
John Coffey : I'll kill you! I Killed all dem people, I'll kill you too!
John Coffey : [the guards break them up and he holds up a mouse] You want some cornbread Mr Jingles. Well you can forget it, because I'M GONNA KILL YOU!