The Simpsons (TV Series)

The Frying Game (2002)

Harry Shearer: Lenny, Judge Snyder, Montgomery Burns, Principal Skinner, Kent Brockman, Reverend Lovejoy, Otto

Quotes 

• Marge Simpson : Thank you for coming to comfort us. Even though we're not Catholic.

  Catholic Priest : Oh, dear, dear, dear. I hope you have a nice stay in Hell, then.

  [Walks serenely away] 

  Reverend Lovejoy : Nice dress!

  Catholic Priest : Oh, why don't you go home and have sex with your wife?

  Reverend Lovejoy : Bring it on!

  [They start fighting] 

• Lenny : If you ask me, Muhammad Ali, in his prime, was much better than anti-lock brakes.

  Carl : Yeah, but what about Johnny Mathis versus Diet Pepsi?

  Moe : Oh, I cannot listen to this again!

• Homer : [accidentally squishing the screamapillar]  Oh, no! I crushed that horrible bug. What should I do?

  [his shoulder devil appears] 

  Homer : Bury it quickly, before anyone finds out.

  [his shoulder angel appears] 

  Homer : Ooh, I'm gonna tell.

  [devil] 

  Homer : The hell you will!

  [he throws his trident at the angel, killing him] 

  Homer : Now we're in it together. There's no going back.

  [he and Homer high-five] 

  Homer : Yeah!

  [as Homer buries the animal, a helicopter appears] 

  EPA Man : Stop what you're doing. Why don't I hear any screaming?

  Homer : Uh, he's sleeping.

  EPA Man : Then why don't I hear any sleep screams?

  Homer : Well, uh, the thing about that is, uh...

  [muffled screaming from the hole] 

  Homer : Whoo-hoo! He's alive!

  [chuckling] 

  Homer : Now you can't punish me.

  Judge Snyder : [in court]  Homer Simpson, for attempted insecticide and aggravated buggery, I sentence you to 200 hours of community service.

  Homer : D'oh!

• Homer : Guys, I just ordered my wife the greatest anniversary present. A koi pond.

  Carl : A koi pond?

  Moe : Yeah, a meditative lily pond with, big, beautiful fish that fry up really good.

  Carl : Oh, that's the perfect gift.

  Lenny : Yeah, you don't even have to feed the fish 'cause squirrels drown in it.

  Carl : You got this husband thing down, Homer.

  Lenny : Yeah, you must be some kind of marriage super-genius. How about a few tips?

  Homer : Certainly, Lenford. Make every day a celebration of your love. Surprise her with a pasta salad. Put a mini-beret on your wang.

  Lenny : [taking notes]  Ooh, this stuff is gold.

  Carl : Happy marriage, here I come.

  Moe : Hmm. This will really help with my speed dating.

  [leaving, then coming back a moment later] 

  Moe : I got 400 "nos".