The Simpsons (TV Series)
The President Wore Pearls (2003)
Marcia Wallace: Edna Krabappel
Quotes
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Lisa : In the Swedish public schools, the students grade the teachers on their performance...
Principal Skinner : Outstanding notions! Each more implementable than the last.
Edna Krabappel : It's a shame you can't stay to discuss them. Here's your schedule for the day.
Lisa : [looking it over] "Photo op helping kindergartners take off snow boots", "move the brushfire hazard needle". Um, shouldn't I stay here and work on school policy?
Principal Skinner : Lisa, you were elected to be seen and enjoyed. Don't hide your light in a smoky back room, making dusty old decisions.
Lisa : [giggling happily] Well, I am proud of my light.
Principal Skinner : But just in case you want to do any more thinking, I'm proud to present you with an official key to the study hall. Use it anytime you like.
Lisa : You mean I can come to the school after hours, weekends, even during the summer?
Principal Skinner : Yes, it's like you're Harry Potter without the magic and wonder. Just sign these authorization forms, and you can be on your way.
[she does so, and he leads her out]
Principal Skinner : [chuckling] That little girl should learn to read things before she signs 'em.
Lisa : [coming back] Excuse me? I was wondering if I should read what I just signed.
Principal Skinner : Oh, it's just standard key release boilerplate.
Lisa : [leaving] Okay.
Principal Skinner : Boy, she'll believe anything.
Lisa : [coming back again] Key release boilerplate? I find that very hard to believe.
Principal Skinner : Mm-hmm, and yet there it is.
[ushering her out]
Principal Skinner : I'll just lock this door.
Lisa : [coming back yet again] Boy, this key opens everything.
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Lisa : Nelson, you're running for president?
Nelson Muntz : I'm not saying I have all the answers, but I do have all the answer *keys* to every test.
[students clamor around him]
Nelson Muntz : [passing them out] Fractions? Dinosaurs? Foreign money? The first Thanksgiving?
Edna Krabappel : Nelson, what are you doing?
Nelson Muntz : Real estate license exam?
Edna Krabappel : [taking it] My ticket to freedom!
Lisa : [dismayed, as the students all start chanting for him] I'm doomed.