SpongeBob SquarePants (TV Series)

Krab Borg/Rock-a-Bye Bivalve (2002)

Rodger Bumpass: Squidward Tentacles

Quotes 

• Squidward : Why couldn't the 11-year-old get into the pirate movie? Because it was rated "Arr!"

• Squidward : We need to find out what that robot did with the real Mr. Krabs. But how?

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Well, in the movie, the hero teams up with a buddy, and they get the poop on the robot.

  Squidward : They poop on the robot?

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Yeah, you know, they get the straight poop. Ask questions, get information.

  Squidward : I never thought I'd say this, but SpongeBob, let's get that poop.

• Mr. Krabs : [SpongeBob and Squidward approach him with angry looks on their faces]  Oh, hello, boys, what can I do for you?

  [SpongeBob and Squidward shut the door and lock it] 

  Mr. Krabs : Heh, heh, why did you lock the door?

  [nervously] 

  Mr. Krabs : Why do you have that rope? Who's watching the cash register?

  [SpongeBob and Squidward attack him and tie him to a chair] 

  Mr. Krabs : SpongeBob!, Squidward! What is the meaning of this? Untie me this instant!

  Squidward : [slaps him]  Shut up!

  Mr. Krabs : Sweet Davy Jones! What the heck is going on?

  Squidward : I said, shut up, you bucket of bolts!

  [slaps him again] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : I can't take it!

  [runs off crying] 

  Squidward : SpongeBob, are you okay?

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Oh, Squidward, seeing you slap Mr. Krabs like that is just too horrible to watch!

  Squidward : No, that's not Mr. Krabs, that's Robot Krabs!

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Oh, yeah.

  Squidward : And the only way to deal with these robot types is to find out what they know.

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Right.

  [walks up to Mr. Krabs and slaps him] 

  Squidward : SpongeBob, you got to ask him a question first.

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Oh, yeah.

  [to Mr. Krabs] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : What color is my underwear?

  [slaps him again] 

• [SpongeBob and Squidward see Mr. Krabs with red eyes, tongs, and dead batteries run into the bathroom] 

  Squidward : [to SpongeBob]  I'll evacuate the customers, you call the Navy!

  SpongeBob SquarePants : [on the phone]  Hello, operator, get me the Navy!

  Computerized Voice : Hello, you've reached the Navy's automated phone service.

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Squidward, the robots are running the Navy!

  Squidward : NOT THE NAVY!

  [speaking over intercom] 

  Squidward : Attention, everyone, run for your lives! Robots are taking over the world!

  [no one moves] 

  Squidward : OUR WORLD!

  [customers freak out and run out of the restaurant] 

• SpongeBob SquarePants : Hey, Mr. Krabs!

  Mr. Krabs : [runs up to the counter]  What? What is it, boy?

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Squidward's father never hugged him. Isn't that sad?

  [pretends to cry] 

  Mr. Krabs : Yes, I suppose that is rather sad, but Squidward can hug himself during his break! Now get back to work!

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Just like the robot in the movie. He couldn't cry either.

  Squidward : SpongeBob, this is getting ridiculous. I'll have you know my father loved me very much!

  SpongeBob SquarePants : That's the final test, Squidward; the love test. Robots can't love.

  Squidward : No, wait, SpongeBob!

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Hey, Mr. Krabs!

  Mr. Krabs : [runs up to the counter again]  What is it, SpongeBob?

  SpongeBob SquarePants : I just wanted to tell you that Squidward loves you!

  [Mr. Krabs makes a blank expression on his face] 

  Mr. Krabs : Get back to work, Mr. Squidward.

• [about "Robot Krabs"] 

  Squidward : Um SpongeBob, how did that movie of yours end?

  SpongeBob : ...the movie? OH! The ending was great! Turns out there were no robots, it was just their... imagination...

  [Spongebob laughs nervously and looks at watch] 

  SpongeBob : Hey, it's time to feed Gary...

  SpongeBob : [He bolts out the door] 

  Squidward : [Squidward begins sweeping nervously] 

  Mr. Krabs : SQUIDWARD!

• Mr. Krabs : [question for Squidward]  You're gonna interrogate my blender? You're crazy!

  Squidward : We're just gonna see what your "little buddy" knows.

  [SpongeBob sets the blender on Mr. Krabs' desk. Squidward holds up a bat] 

  Mr. Krabs : [panicked]  No, wait! What are you going to do to me blender? That cost me money!

  Squidward : [to the blender]  Where's Mr. Krabs? Not talking, eh?

  [breaks the blender with the bat] 

  Mr. Krabs : No! That cost me $24.95!

  SpongeBob SquarePants : I guess it didn't know anything.

  Squidward : Go get the toaster.

  [SpongeBob gets the toaster and puts it on Mr. Krabs' desk] 

  Mr. Krabs : No, not me toaster. That cost me $32.50!

  [Squidward breaks the toaster. Then SpongeBob sets a food processor on the desk] 

  Mr. Krabs : $62.67!

  [Squidward breaks the food processor with the bat. SpongeBob picks up a coffee maker and puts it on the desk] 

  Mr. Krabs : Four... Well, actually, that one was a gift.

  [Squidward breaks the coffee maker] 

  Mr. Krabs : [screaming]  NO!

• [SpongeBob and Squidward are accusing Mr. Krabs of being a robot, repeatedly asking the "robot" what happened to the "real" Mr. Krabs] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : This is one stubborn robot.

  Mr. Krabs : [in anger]  WHAT? YOU THINK I'M A ROBOT?

  Squidward : We don't think. We know.

  Mr. Krabs : That's the silliest thing I ever heard! I am Mr. Krabs!

• Squidward : Patrick go be stupid somewhere else!