SpongeBob SquarePants (TV Series)

Christmas Who? (2000)

Tom Kenny: SpongeBob, Patchy the Pirate, Narrator, Old Fish, Singer #1, Gary, Jellyfish

Photos 

Quotes 

• Squidward : My wish is that the people of Bikini Bottom will stop paying any attention to the inane drivel that is constantly streaming out of this dunderhead's mouth.

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Gee, Squidward, maybe Santa will bring me a dictionary so I can understand what you just said.

• Patchy : [a hand rings a bell three times]  Three bells! You know what that means, kids!

  Kids : Free ice cream!

  Patchy : [laughing]  No, you silly livers...

  [sternly] 

  Patchy : No!

  Potty : Man overboard?

  Patchy : You I'm ignoring.

• SpongeBob SquarePants : Santa! This is the greatest gift you could've given me! Thank you for bringing Christmas to Bikini Bottom.

  Squidward : [as Santa]  I didn't bring Christmas to Bikini Bottom, SpongeBob. *You* did.

• SpongeBob SquarePants : [devoutly]  The hopes of everyone rests on the success of its maiden voyage.

• Narrator : [Opening line; as the camera pan over the live-action houses from the air]  And now, direct from Encino, America's favorite pirate and president of the SpongeBob SquarePants fan club...

  Narrator : [as the red "Patchy" appears in a angle in front of his house]  Patchy the Pirate.

• Narrator : [Closing lines]  Well, it looks like Patchy's pretty busy at the moment, so I'll say it for him. Good night...

  Narrator : [as the red "Happy Holidays" writes out in front of the house]  and happy holidays.

• Sandy Cheeks : Don't you know a Christmas tree when you see one?

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Christmas who?

• Squidward : What do you want, can't you see that I'm busy?

  Patrick , SpongeBob SquarePants : Step outside, we've got something for you to see!

  Squidward : Spongebob, take this stuff down immediately

  Patrick , SpongeBob SquarePants : Chestnuts roasting and burns in the third degree

• Patchy : [to Potty]  You I'm ignoring

  [to the audience] 

  Patchy : No it's time to open fan letters.

  Potty : Here you go.

  [refuses to give Patchy the letter and starts squawking] 

  Patchy : Thank you Potty. Okay Potty thank you.

  [Potty still isn't giving the envelope] 

  Patchy : Come on give it you bird brain.

  [frustrated] 

  Patchy : Quiet Infernal Bird!

  [cuts the string holding Potty up] 

  Potty : Wahhhh!

  [falls on the ground] 

  Patchy : This letter comes to us from

  [the narrator interrupts talking over Patchy] 

  Narrator : Name and address withheld.

  Patchy : [tears open the envelope and puts on his reading glasses]  and he writes Dear SpongeBob I'm 10 years old and I was wondering if you like Christmas as much as I do. Sincerely yours,

  [the signature is censored out] 

  Narrator : Name and address withheld.

  Patchy : A very good question. But did you know that they didn't always celebrate Christmas.

  Potty : They didn't?

  Patchy : Oh sure my fine feathered little neck of pain.

  [yanks on the string very hard] 

  Puppeteer : Woah!

  [falls from the ceiling and lands on the ground hard] 

• Patchy : [putting an ornament on the tree]  There was a time when nobody even heard of Christmas. Hey who wants to hear the story of SpongeBob's Very First Christmas?

  Potty : [in pain]  Squawk.

  Patchy : Potty?

  [we see the bowl which had cookie dough in it is now empty] 

  Patchy : You ate all me cookie dough!

  Potty : [Potty's body falls off]  Squouch!

  Patchy : Oh well, on with the show.