SpongeBob SquarePants (TV Series)

SpongeBob Meets the Strangler/Pranks a Lot (2004)

Tom Kenny: SpongeBob SquarePants, Narrator, Geek Fish, Poo Fish, Eyeball #1

Quotes 

• SpongeBob SquarePants : Bodyguard, let me just take this opportunity to say that you're the best bodyguard a fella could hope to have.

  Strangler : Alright, enough of the sappy talk. Open the door so I can strangle you- I mean, uh, uh, choke you, I mean, uh, crush you with my- Gahhhh! I mean...

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Protect me?

  Strangler : Uh, thanks.

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Don't mention it, Strangler.

  [He gasps] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : I mean, bodyguard.

• SpongeBob SquarePants : So, Patrick's the Strangler? Gee, you think you know a guy.

  Strangler : [exploding]  He's not the Strangler!

  SpongeBob SquarePants : He's not?

  Strangler : [rips off his fake mustache]  I AM!

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Hey, how'd you do that without shaving cream?

  Strangler : Oh, it's a FAKE, you idiot! I bought it at the party store!

  Squidward Tentacles : [the partygoers suddenly return]  Did someone say "party"?

  Strangler : AAH!

  [crashes through wall] 

• [SpongeBob has accidentally jumped into the Strangler's eyesockets] 

  Strangler : Get your cleats out of my eyesockets!

  [SpongeBob tries to pull his leg out of one of the Strangler's sockets] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : I'm trying, but my cleats are stuck in your corneas!

• SpongeBob SquarePants : Well, let's get started.

  [Patrick takes off his shorts] 

  Patrick Star : OK, I'm ready.

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Any particular reason you took your pants off?

  Patrick Star : Well, that stuff stains clothes, right?

  SpongeBob SquarePants : That it does, Patrick, that it does. Good thinking. Here, hold this a second.

  [Patrick takes the can of spray while SpongeBob takes off his pants. Patrick hugs the can] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : OK, Patrick, give me the can.

  Patrick Star : I think since spraying the park bench was my idea, I should get to spray it.

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Patrick, spraying the park bench was my idea.

  Patrick Star : Yeah, but I said it was a good idea!

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Give me that thing.

  [SpongeBob grabs the can and he and Patrick wrestle over it. SpongeBob accidentally sprays their clothes and they disappear] 

  Patrick Star : Hey, the invisible spray works!

  [a tour bus drives up] 

  Tom : And on your right, if you look, you'll see two naked guys fighting over a can of paint!

  [the passengers and Tom laugh. The bus drives off. SpongeBob covers his lower half] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Oh my gosh, Patrick, help me find our clothes!

  [SpongeBob pats the ground, trying to grab the clothes. Patrick sprays SpongeBob's right hand and it disappears] 

  Patrick Star : I gotta hand it to you, SpongeBob. You look kinda funny.

  [Patrick laughs and SpongeBob screams] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Righty, where are you?

  [Patrick laughs again] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : No one messes with Righty!

  [He takes the spray can with his invisible hand] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : We'll see how you like it!

  [sprays Patrick making a hole in the middle of his body] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Kind of gives you an empty feeling, huh?

  [Patrick takes the can] 

  Patrick Star : Yeah.

  [He sprays SpongeBob's upper left corner, including his eye] 

  Patrick Star : I see what you mean.

  [SpongeBob takes the spray can and sprays Patrick's lower half] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : No guts, no glory!

  [SpongeBob laughs] 

  Narrator : Several bad puns later...

  [SpongeBob and Patrick are now completely invisible] 

• Patrick Star : Hey, SpongeBob, do you know what time it is?

  SpongeBob SquarePants : [sarcastically]  Oh, sure, it's half past invisible.