Star Trek: Voyager (TV Series)

Someone To Watch Over Me (1999)

Robert Picardo: The Doctor

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Quotes 

• Neelix : [as Tomin lies in sick bay]  I thought synthehol wasn't supposed to have this effect on people.

  The Doctor : Most people. The enzyymes that break down synthehol aren't present in his bloodstream.

  Neelix : Can you counteract the effects?

  The Doctor : I can synthesize the enzymes, but that'll take days.

  Neelix : Days? The Captain will be back in the morning.

  Lt. Tom Paris : Maybe he needs a cold shower.

  Neelix : If his superiors find him like this, he'll be banished from the colony, and our trade agreement will go right out the airlock!

  Tomin : Oh, Seven of mine...

  Seven of Nine : It may be possible to encode some of my nanoprobes to assimilate the synthehol molecules.

  Tomin : Assimilate me!

• The Doctor : [Another of the Doctor's dating lessons, said to a preoccupied Seven]  The key to finding a compatible partner is learning how to share your interests and goals. We'll start with hobbies.

  [speaking as if a potential suitor] 

  The Doctor : What do you do with your spare time?

  Seven of Nine : Regenerate.

  The Doctor : Uh-huh. Tell me about you tastes, your likes and dislikes.

  Seven of Nine : I dislike irrelevant conversations.

  The Doctor : Okaaay, which brings us to 'goals'. What do you want out of life?

  Seven of Nine : Perfection.

• The Doctor : You're a woman, Seven.

  Seven of Nine : Is that an observation or a diagnosis?

• [Seven offers to get Paris and/or the Doctor a drink] 

  The Doctor : You know I don't drink. I don't have the stomach for it.

• The Doctor : I heard about the mess hall incident.

  Seven of Nine : This crew can be very efficient at disseminating information, when they choose to be.

  The Doctor : They say gossip travels faster than warp speed.

• [the Doctor's showing Seven a slide presentation about mating] 

  The Doctor : Here we see how 'fortess ovum' is besieged by countless little warriors...

  Seven of Nine : Doctor, I am familiar with the physiological processes of sexuality.

• The Doctor : Perhaps you should consider... expanding your research to the realm of dating.

  Seven of Nine : Dating? You mean procreation?

  The Doctor : One step at a time. Dating is a human ritual, wherein two people share a social activity, get to know each other. In time, it can lead to a romantic involvement, and eventually, if all goes well, even marriage.

  Seven of Nine : One step at a time.

• [the Doctor has taken Seven out to Ambassador Tomin's reception] 

  Tom Paris : Impressive. You're actually taught her to be polite, but don't think you've won our bet. She was supposed to bring a REAL date.

  The Doctor : Photons and force fields, flesh and blood - why quibble over details?

• Tomin : [shouting across the mess hall]  Ensign Paris, tell us another one of those hologram jokes!

  The Doctor : You've been stealing my material?

  Tom Paris : That guy's so lubricated, he'll laugh at anything.

• The Doctor : Are you implying that Seven couldn't get a date?

  Tom Paris : What, are you kidding? Half the men on this ship would jump at the chance; but, getting a date is one thing. Keeping it from turning into a disaster is another.

• The Doctor : Even Romeo and Juliet hit a few snags at first.

• [the Doctor begins his lesson plan] 

  The Doctor : I've prepared an introduction. I call it "Love Amid the Stars."

• The Doctor : [early in his "Love Amid the Stars" presentation]  Of course, the species you're most likely to interact with is human, so without further ado - Lesson 1: First Contact.

• The Doctor : Lesson 2: Encounter in a Public Place.

• The Doctor : It's time for Lesson 3: Getting to Know You.

• The Doctor : Lesson 8: Dress for Success.

• The Doctor : Seven, perhaps now would be a good time to review Lesson 23: Toast of the Town.

• The Doctor : This may be a good time to cover Lesson 35: Shall We Dance?

• The Doctor : The courtship of some species remain shrouded in mystery. For example, Species 8472 appears to have as many as five sexes. Bystanders better keep their distance.