- Colonel Jack O'Neill: [Hammond has accepted O'Neill's offer of beer] I hope you like Guinness, sir. I find it a refreshing substitute for... food.
- Dr. Daniel Jackson: Teal'c's like one of the deepest people I know. I mean, he's *so* deep. Go on, t-tell them how deep you are! You'll be lucky if you understand this.
- Teal'c: [lifts one eyebrow] My depth is immaterial to this conversation.
- Dr. Daniel Jackson: Ooh! See?
- Colonel Jack O'Neill: No more beer for you.
- Major Samantha Carter: [Daniel suspects that Jack has just completed a crossword puzzle using the Ancient's language, and Sam is studying it] The clue for 7 down is 'celestial body', and he wrote 'Uma Thurman'.
- Colonel Jack O'Neill: [in a content voice, smiling] Yes.
- Colonel Jack O'Neill: [about the president and vice-president] Does anyone know anyone who voted for those two shrubs?
- [Jack has filled a crossword with Ancient words]
- Dr. Daniel Jackson: Jack, this is it.
- Colonel Jack O'Neill: Now see, I assume we still speak the same language, mostly.
- Dr. Daniel Jackson: Sphere: Planet. Label: Name.
- Colonel Jack O'Neill: Following still you not!
- Major Samantha Carter: [Takes a folded up crossword puzzle from Jack] The fate of the world is hanging in the balance and you've been sitting in your truck finishing this?
- Colonel Jack O'Neill: I believe it was double or nothing.
- Major Samantha Carter: OK, 23 across, the atomic weight of Boron. The answer is ten.
- Colonel Jack O'Neill: Yes?
- Major Samantha Carter: You wrote the word 'fat.'
- Colonel Jack O'Neill: Your point?
- Dr. Elizabeth Weir: I understand time is short.
- Colonel Jack O'Neill: Actually, it's all relative, ma'am. Carter could explain better if we had more time.
- Colonel Jack O'Neill: Is that doughnuts?
- Teal'c: Indeed.
- Colonel Jack O'Neill: [impersonating Mr. Burns] Ex-cellent!
- Dr. Daniel Jackson: I remember when we were first trying to get the Stargate to work, I would come here and just stare at it for hours.
- Dr. Elizabeth Weir: Is that a-a gentle reminder that you've been an important part of this since the very beginning?
- Dr. Daniel Jackson: Subtle, huh?
- [Bra'tac comes to the SGC]
- Dr. Daniel Jackson: This is Dr. Elizabeth Weir. She's the new leader of this facility.
- Dr. Elizabeth Weir: [extends her hand] Hello.
- Master Bra'tac: [concerned] Has Hammond of Texas fallen in battle?
- Dr. Elizabeth Weir: No, sir. He's-he's fine.
- [Anubis is planning to attack in three days]
- Colonel Jack O'Neill: Three days from now's a Thursday. Thursday's not good for us.
- Major Samantha Carter: And then it will overwhelm his nervous system, and the colonel will...
- Colonel Jack O'Neill: What? Meet my maker? Pay the piper? Reach the pearly gates? Start pushin' up daisies here and there?
- Dr. Elizabeth Weir: I've been awake all weekend. I-I... The reality of this is-is-is... It's an adrenaline rush.
- Dr. Daniel Jackson: Hey, at least I know you have a beating heart!
- [Dr. Weir puts down a file and looks out the briefing room window into the gate room, seemingly in deep thought. Daniel Jackson walks in, notices her gaze at the stargate, waits a moment, then speaks]
- Dr. Daniel Jackson: Amazing, isn't it?
- Dr. Elizabeth Weir: I don't really care!
- Dr. Daniel Jackson: Okay.
- Vice President Robert Kinsey: [Elizabeth Weir has just introduced herself to SG-1, and Vice President Kinsey quickly follows her into the room] You could call her your one hope of ever stepping through the Stargate again.
- Colonel Jack O'Neill: Bit of a mouthful.