- Bill: [Visting a religious family's house, Bill sees a picture of Jesus] Man, these people sure do love that Kenny Loggins.
- Lauren Miller: Dad, that's GOD.
- Bill: Eh, he won a few Grammys, nothing really special.
- Lauren Miller: Why is it so hot out?
- Bill: Because your mother and I used a lot of hairspray in the Eighties.
- Judy Miller: Bill, these PTA people are great! They laugh at every stupid thing I say.
- Bill: Yeah, they're not bad. I guess we can't call them PTA-holes anymore.
- Brian Miller: [snooping through Bill's wallet] One hundred sixty-five pounds? Yeah, maybe on the moon!