The Simpsons (TV Series)
Homer Loves Flanders (1994)
Julie Kavner: Marge Simpson
Quotes
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Homer : God, if you really are God, you'll get me tickets to that game.
[doorbell rings]
Ned Flanders : Heidely-ho, neighbor. Wanna go to the game with me? I got two tick...
Homer : [slams the door, looks heavenward] Why do you mock me, O Lord?
Marge : Homer, that's not God. That's just a waffle that Bart tossed up there.
[Marge scrapes it off the ceiling into Homer's hands]
Homer : I know I shouldn't eat thee, but...
[bites]
Homer : Mmm, sacrilicious.
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[Bart pulls two tickets out of his pockets]
Bart Simpson : Hey dad, sell you these for fifty bucks!
Homer Simpson : Woo-hoo! Sold!
[without a second thought, pulls out fifty dollars, hands it to Bart and takes his tickets. Bart happily runs out of the house]
Marge Simpson : Those aren't tickets to the game, Homer.
Homer Simpson : What do you mean? It says right here: "Free wig with every purchase of large wig. Downtown Wig Center."
[realizing he's been had]
Homer Simpson : Why, you little... !
[ponders]
Homer Simpson : Hmm, "free wig."
[imagines putting on Marge-type wig and humming]
Homer Simpson : [in Marge voice] I love you, Homie. Hmm.
[in normal voice]
Homer Simpson : Heh heh heh. I don't need her at all anymore.