Full House (TV Series)

You Pet It, You Bought It (1994)

Dave Coulier: Joey Gladstone

Quotes 

• Joey Gladstone : How does the theme song for 'Batman' go?

  Jesse Katsopolis : You mean, "Batman... da da da da BATMAN"?

  Joey Gladstone : Yeah, that's it.

  Jesse Katsopolis : So, which words couldn't you remember? Uh, "Batman" or "Da"?

• Danny Tanner : [outraged that Shorty's head is in its place of General Cornwall's portrait]  Great-Granddaddy Cornwall!

  Jesse Katsopolis : You know, I'm finally starting to see the family resemblance.

  [Danny takes Shorty's head from the portrait] 

  Michelle Tanner : Shorty, how could you?

  Danny Tanner : That's it! He's out of here!

  [starts towards the front door] 

  Joey Gladstone : Danny, where are you going?

  Danny Tanner : [yelling outside]  Anybody wanna buy a donkey?

  Jesse Katsopolis : Danny, nobody wants to buy a donkey.

  Michelle Tanner : I did.

  Danny Tanner : [yelling outside]  All right, anybody want a FREE donkey?

  Female Neighbor : [from outside]  Shut up, Tanner! I'd rather hear the donkey!

  Becky Katsopolis : [drags Danny inside]  Danny, come in here. The neighbors are armed and cranky.

• Danny Tanner : Guys, you are gonna love this. This is a piece of history, real Americana. I was going through some old family photos, right? And I found the picture of my great-great-grandfather, General Cornwall Tanner, okay? I had it blown up and completely restored. Look at this.

  [shows the portrait] 

  Jesse Katsopolis : You should have just had it blown up.

  [Jesse and Joey laugh over the joke] 

  Danny Tanner : Just so happens he was a great Civil War hero and this should be put in a place of honor.

  Joey Gladstone : How about under the mantle?

  Danny Tanner : The fireplace is under the mantle.

  Joey Gladstone : I'll get the matches.

  [Jesse and Joey laugh again]