Jack and Jill (I) (2011)

Tim Meadows: Ted

Photos 

Quotes 

• Ted : What's this about a twin?

  Todd : Oh, Jack. He has a twin sister.

  Ted : Are you kidding me? You never told me you had a twin sister.

  Jack Sadelstein : No, no, I mean, she's...

  Ted : Identical or fraternal?

  Todd : Nocturnal, like a bat.

• Ted : There is no god and we are living a lie.