Hotel Transylvania (2012)
Adam Sandler: Dracula
Photos
Quotes
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Dracula : [against the window of an airplane, sees a Twilight movie playing] This is how we're represented, unbelievable.
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Jonathan : Uh, can I just ask? What exactly is this place?
Dracula : What is this place? It's a place I built, for all those monsters out there lurking in the shadows. Hiding from the persecution of human kind. A for them and their families to come to and be themselves. A void of torches, pitchforks, angry mobs. A place of peace, relaxation, and tranquility.
Jonathan : Cool, so it's like a hotel for monsters?
Dracula : [irritated] Yes, exactly. A hotel for monsters, way to sum it up.
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Dracula : I do not say, "Bleh bleh bleh"!
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Dracula : Listen to me, you are never to return here. Your are to stay away and tell no humans about this place. Or I will track you down, and suck every ounce of blood from you body, until you look like a deflated whoopee cushion!
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Dracula : [Runs after Quasimodo to rescue Jonathan, but is stopped by Mavis] Mavis? Why are you still up? The sun is out. It could kill you, my honey-gut.
Mavis : I couldn't sleep. You know where Jonny went?
Dracula : I don't know. He -
[Turns around & eyes her down angrily]
Dracula : Why do you want know?
Mavis : Oh! Uh,
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Dracula : Hey you don't need a manikin!
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Dracula : Good morning Mavey Wavey.
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Dracula : House-keeping!
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Dracula : I know I lied. I was wrong. But you have to believe this: Johnny wasn't a bad guy. The truth is, I don't know if humans are bad anymore. Frank, come on, buddy. You understand.
Eunice : He's not talking to you. First you tell us humans are bad, now they're good, what else? Up is down, cold is hot, gremlins don't smell.
Gremlin Man : Hey!
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Dracula : [holding Jonathan and looking at Mavis] Someone closer to your age, help plan the party.
Mavis : [looking at Jonathan] You're my age!
Jonathan : Sure, oh, well, how old are you?
Mavis : 118.
Jonathan : 100 and...
[Dracula elbows Jonathan in the stomach]
Jonathan : Yeah, I'm 121.
Mavis : Really?
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[last lines as she's eating letters on the ending credits]
Elderly Gremlin : I didn't do that.
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Dracula : It's ok we all get stomachaches Mr Big Foot.
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Dracula : Welcome To Hotel Transylvania!
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Dracula : Evil villain you will never win!
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Dracula : [Dracula reading a tale book to little Mavis in the bed] And then the monsters ran away and were forced into hiding. But Harry the Human found them and jumped out from under their bed.
Young Mavis : [Mavis hides the bedding] I'm scared!
Dracula : And burned their clothes, and bit their toes!
[Dracula seeks bedding and not seen little Mavis]
Dracula : And took their candy!
[Dracula looks down little Mavis in the bedroom's hide]
Young Mavis : Don't take my candy.
Dracula : Babyclaws, you don't need to be frightened. I promised your mommy I would protect you forever.
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Dracula : [to Johnny about Martha] She was killed by your kind.
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Young Mavis : What out there?
Dracula : Oh, we never go out there. Ever.
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[first lines]
Dracula : Peek-a-boo!
Baby Mavis : [crying]
Dracula : No, no, no, no, no. I didn't mean to starle you, my little baby. Shh, shh, shh.
Dracula : [Dracula singing to baby Mavis] Hush, little vampire, don't say a word / Papa's gonna bite the head off a bird
Dracula : A-bitty-goo-bah! I vant to kiss your *tush.*
[Dracula kissing tush to baby Mavis and changes the diaper]
Dracula : I vant to kiss your *tush!*
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Dracula : No one will harm her here.
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Frankenstein : [points at Johnny] Who is that?
Jonathan : [whispering to Drac] Are these monsters gonna kill me?
Dracula : [whispering to Johnny] Not as long as they think you're a monster.
Jonathan : Huh? That's kinda racist.
Dracula : We'll talk later.
[Johnny is imitating Frank]
Frankenstein : [to Drac about Johnny] Is... is he making fun of me?
Dracula : No, no! Of course not, because he's...
[stops Johnny from imitating]
Mavis : He's your cousin. Johnny-stein.
Frankenstein : I don't have no cousin.
Dracula : No, no, you do. He's your sixth cousin, three times removed.
Jonathan : [holds up his right arm] On your right arm's side.
Frankenstein : [to his right arm] You have a cousin?
Dracula : Frank, if your arm can talk, it would tell you that the original owner of your arm had a brother...
Jonathan : ...Who married a woman...
Dracula : ...Who was...
[makes killing gesture]
Jonathan : ...For strangling a pig.
Frankenstein : I have pig strangling blood in my arm? That's kinda cool.
[to Johnny]
Frankenstein : Well, Cuz, great to meetcha.
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[Everyone is playing Bingo, Eunice gets bingo]
Eunice : Bingo! Bingo!
Eunice : [the Elderly Goblin eats her bingo card] How dare you? Do you know what doctor made *me*?
Elderly Gremlin : I didn't do that.
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[Eats Johnny's scooter]
Elderly Gremlin : I didn't do that.
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Frankenstein : Drac.
Dracula : Yes, Frank?
Frankenstein : Hey, buddy, what you been doing?
Dracula : [to Johnny] Don't move.
[to Frank]
Dracula : Never mind that. What you been doing?
Wayne : We wanted to practice our big number for Mavis' party, and then these losers wouldn't get off the bandstand.
Dracula : Okay. Put down Zombie Mozart, Bach and Beethoven this instant.
[Frank and Wayne throw them]
Dracula : Did you get to rehearse at all, Zombie Beethoven?
[Zombie Beethoven moans]
Wayne : Listen, Drac, we wanted to play something, like old times. We even thought maybe you'd sing with us.
Dracula : Come on, fellas. You know that I haven't sung in public since Martha...
Frankenstein : Yeah, but we just thought how much, you know, Mavis would love it.
Dracula : I said, no!
[roars with his monster face]
Dracula : Don't ask me again! Okay. Now, let's hug the zombies. Let's all make up.
Wayne : [to Frank] Wow, he really scared you.
Frankenstein : I wasn't scared. I was being polite, okay?
