Family Guy (TV Series)

McStroke (2008)

Alex Borstein: Lois Griffin

Quotes 

• Lois Griffin : [on Peter's new mustache]  I think it's handsome.

  Brian Griffin : I think it's gay.

  Peter Griffin : Oh yeah? Well, if I'm gay then Freddie Mercury was gay.

  Brian Griffin : Freddie Mercury, the lead singer of Queen? He was incredibly gay!

  Peter Griffin : He was not. He had a mustache. That's practically like having a wedding band.

• Peter Griffin : Black guy mail!

  Lois Griffin : Peter, you're just supposed to pick up Cleveland's mail, not go through it.

  Peter Griffin : Lois, black people are different than you and I. And me, I find that hilarious.

• Lois Griffin : Peter, have you seen Brian?

  Peter Griffin : [muffled voice]  No, Lois. I have not.

  Lois Griffin : Well, I haven't seen him since this morning, and I...

  [looks at Peter's face] 

  Lois Griffin : What is that on your head?

  [Peter turns around to reveal Brian duct-taped to his face] 

  Peter Griffin : It's a mustache, Lois! What? You never seen a mustache before?

  Brian Griffin : Lois, would you mind calling the police or something?

  Peter Griffin : Quiet, mustache!

  Lois Griffin : Oh my God, Peter, I know you're upset about losing that thing, but get a grip on yourself. Let Brian down!

  Peter Griffin : No! I'm not living my life without a mustache! Even if sometimes my mustache has Alpo-gas.

  [Brian farts] 

  Peter Griffin : Mustache fart.