Desperate Housewives (TV Series)

Welcome to Kanagawa (2008)

Marcia Cross: Bree Hodge

Quotes 

• Bree : We need to find someone who's bad at gay math!

• Andrew Van De Kamp : Mom, I'm gonna take these bowls to the kitchen...

  Bree : Oh! thanks, dear.

  Andrew Van De Kamp : With you... What are you doing?

  Bree : Oh, I'm trying to stay out of the way of all the sparks that are flying...

  Andrew Van De Kamp : Sparks? The man is twice my age.

  Bree : Yes, but he's also... he's got a great sense of... OK, do you know how hard it is to get a good contractor?

  Andrew Van De Kamp : Oh my God.

  Bree : And poor Walter just had his heart broken, so if it takes you being nice to hime to have our house fixed...

  Andrew Van De Kamp : You're pimping me out for a new roof?

  Bree : And windows... and I'm not pimping you out, I'm simply asking you to show some kindness to a lonely man who happens to be an excellent roofer.

  Andrew Van De Kamp : Look, if by kindness you mean sex...

  Bree : Watch your mouth, I would never suggest that. You can raise a man's hopes without satisfying them, I've done it all my life. Andrew, I have got to get back into my house, and you're my only hope.

  Andrew Van De Kamp : Fine, for you I'll flirt, I'll flatter and I'll charm.

  Bree : Bless you...

  Andrew Van De Kamp : And in exchange... I expect a 60-inch flat-screen TV.

  Bree : Fine. And if you can get him to come on time and under budget, I'll throw in surround sound.

• Bree : [Bree is trying to set Andrew up with their contractor, hinting at him]  Oh yes, he just broke up with his life partner, TODD... who he was GAY WITH.