- Jerry Russo: You did all this for your mother, and look how happy you made her.
- Alex Russo: I'm glad we did this too, dad.
- Jerry Russo: You really are turning into a wonderful woman, just like her. I am so proud of you, honey.
- Alex Russo: Even when I break the rules and use magic behind your back?
- Jerry Russo: Even then. Oh, honey, are you crying?
- Alex Russo: [nods] Yeah, but why aren't you? You've been crying for days.
- Jerry Russo: Well, I think I'm all cried out.
- Alex Russo: Really? What if I told you how much this quinceañera cost?
- Jerry Russo: [starting to cry] Oh my gosh, here it comes again.
- [last lines]
- Jerry Russo: Well, guys, you managed to refrain from using magic the whole time grandma's been here.
- Alex Russo: You're welcome.
- Max Russo: It wasn't easy.
- Justin Russo: Took a lot of restraint.
- Jerry Russo: Well, you should really pat yourselves on the back.
- Magdalena: Well, I've never been in *this* room before.
- Jerry Russo: Uh, ah...
- Magdalena: Wow, is this room what I think it is?
- Max Russo: What room do *you* think it is?
- Magdalena: Hmmm.
- [grabs Max]
- Magdalena: The wrestling room.
- [laughs]
- Max Russo: Two out of three!
- [first lines]
- Jerry Russo: Okay. Before I start class, I want to remind you all that your grandmother is coming for a visit. And since she's your mother's mother and not my mother she doesn't know anything about all of this.
- Max Russo: You mean how you won't turn on the AC in here?
- Jerry Russo: No, I'm talking about magic. And when grandma's here no-one uses magic or talks about magic.
- Magdalena: If I can make salsa, I can dance the salsa. You've heard the saying: "you dance what you eat".
- Justin Russo: Grandma, it's "you are what you eat".
- Magdalena: Do you know how to dance?
- Justin Russo: No.
- Magdalena: Then shut up.