The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)
The Luminous Fish Effect (2007)
Laurie Metcalf: Mary Cooper
Photos
Quotes
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Sheldon : I'm not going to apologize. I didn't say anything that wasn't true.
Mary : [Firmly] Now you listen here, I have been telling you since you were four years old, it's okay to be smarter than everybody else, but you can't go around pointing it out.
Sheldon : Why?
Mary : [All but yelling] Because people don't like it! Remember all the ass-kickings you got from the neighbor kids?
[Drops a pair of shoes down]
Mary : Now let's get crackin'! Shower, shirt, shoes, and let's shove off!
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Mary : Leonard, the Lord never gives us more than we can handle. Thankfully He blessed me with two other children who are dumb as soup.
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Mary : He gets his temper from his daddy. He's got my eyes. All that science stuff, oh, that comes from Jesus.
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Sheldon : Mom, what are you doing here?
Mary : Leonard called me.
Sheldon : I know, but why?
Leonard : Because one of the great minds of the 21st Century is raising glow-in-the-dark fish and weaving serapes.
Sheldon : This is not a serape. This is a poncho! A serape is open to the sides, a poncho is closed, this is a poncho! And neither is a reason to call someone's mother!
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Mary : [praying before dinner; aside to Raj and Howard] Now, after a moment of silent meditation, I'm gonna end with "In Jesus' Name," but you two don't feel any obligation to join in. Unless, of course, the Holy Spirit moves you.
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Mary : I tell you, I love the boy to death but he has been difficult since he fell outta me at the K-Mart.
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Mary Cooper : I remember one summer when he was 13. He built a small nuclear reactor in the shed and told everybody he was gonna provide free electricity for the whole town. Well, the only problem was, he had no what you call fissionable materials. Anyway, when he went on the internets to get some, a man from the government come by and sat him down real gentle and told him it's against the law to have yellow-cake uranium in a shed.
Penny : What happened?
Mary Cooper : Well, poor boy had a fit. Locked himself in his room and built a sonic death ray.
Leonard Hofstadter : A death ray?
Mary Cooper : Well that's what he called it. Didn't even slow down the neighbor kids. It pissed our dog off to no end.
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[to Raj]
Mary : I made chicken. I hope that isn't one of the animals that you people think is magic.
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Leonard : [He and an older woman come upstairs] Thanks for coming on such short notice.
Mary : [Quietly] You did the right thing calling.
Leonard : I didn't know what to do. He's lost all focus. Every day he's got a new obsession.
[They enter the apartment and see Sheldon at work at a loom]
Leonard : This is a particularly disturbing one.
Sheldon : [He turns around on that and is shocked to see her] Mommy?
Mary : [Walks up and hugs him] Hi baby!
[as she does, Sheldon looks at Leonard and mouths, "You called my mother?" to which Leonard has a guilt look on his face]
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Mary Cooper : That looks awful fancy. What is that?
Sheldon Cooper : It's my idea of what DNA would look like in a silicon-based life form.
Sheldon Cooper : But intelligently designed by a creator, right?
