One Day at a Time (TV Series)

So Long, Mom (1980)

Pat Harrington Jr.: Dwayne F. Schneider

Quotes 

• Barbara Cooper : I think it's about time that I moved out.

  Dwayne F. Schneider : [entering in time to hear Barbara's last words]  Hah-hah. Moved out! She said moved out. You don't mean...

  Barbara Cooper : Moved out.

  Ann Romano : She wants to live on campus, Schneider.

  Dwayne F. Schneider : [suddenly realizing the seriousness]  Y'mean in one of those co-ed dorms? Absolutely not! You realize what's goin' on in college today? These kids are matriculating each other and everything.

• Dwayne F. Schneider : [on hearing that Barbara wants to move out]  I don't believe this.

  Barbara Cooper : Schneider... how old were you when you moved out?

  Dwayne F. Schneider : [suddenly defensive]  Oh, aw, wha... well, that's a whole diff-... all right, I was sixteen. But that's a completely different thing. I mean, I was a man.

  Ann Romano : At sixteen?

  Dwayne F. Schneider : At thirteen.