- Brain-2-Me-2: Come, Pinky-O. We must catch the space shuttle back to our home planet of Acme and prepare for the next millennium.
- 3-Pinky-O: Gee, Brain-2, what are we gonna do in the next millennium?
- Brain-2-Me-2: The same thing we do every millennium, Pinky-O. Try to take over the galaxy!
- [Mindy appears as a Jawa]
- Mindy: Hello, funny vacuum cleaner man.
- Brain-2-Me-2: I am not a vacuum cleaner.
- 3-Pinky-O: Yes! He's a refrigerator.
- Brain-2-Me-2: No, I'm a robot stranded in the desert with his dimwitted sidekick!
- 3-Pinky-O: That would be me! Hoo hoo hoo ha ha ha ha!
- Mindy: [giggles] Funny vacuum cleaner man!
- Brain-2-Me-2: Uh, perhaps you could direct us to the nearest space port, little girl.
- Mindy: Why?
- Brain-2-Me-2: Because we need to get to the Megastar.
- Mindy: Why?
- Brain-2-Me-2: Because we're trying to take over the galaxy.
- Mindy: Why?
- Brain-2-Me-2: Because with me in charge, it will be a better place.
- Mindy: Why?
- Brain-2-Me-2: Because I'm really smart.
- Mindy: Why?
- Brain-2-Me-2: Because I am! Now stop saying "why"!
- Mindy: Why?
- Brain-2-Me-2: Because you're driving me crazy!
- Mindy: Why?
- Brain-2-Me-2: Pinky-O, tell her to stop!
- 3-Pinky-O: Why? Hoo hoo ha ha ha ha! Narf!
- Brain-2-Me-2: ENOUGH!
- Mindy: Okay, I love you. Bye-bye.
- [Mindy zaps the two robots]
- Brain-2-Me-2: There's a pain that is going to tingle.
- Mindy: Hi, Mr. Farmer man.
- Wakk Skylicker: Hello, little nomad Nurse! I'm Wakk Skylicker.
- Mindy: Whatcha doin'?
- Wakk Skylicker: Farming sand. I've got a big crop this year.
- Mindy: [looks at all the sand in confusion] Uhhh... okay.
- [brings out 3-Pinky-O and Brain-2-Me-2]
- Mindy: Wanna buy a funny vacuum cleaner man?
- Wakk Skylicker: No thanks.
- Brain-2-Me-2: I am not a vacuum cleaner.
- Wakk Skylicker: But I'll buy a talking garbage can any day!
- [Wakk Skylicker pays Mindy with a handful of sand]
- Mindy: Okay, I love you. Bye-bye.
- Wakk Skylicker: [after noticing Princess Dot in Brain-2-Me-2's projection] Hello, girl-who-looks-just-like-my-long-lost sister Nurse!
- 3-Pinky-O: Your sister is tiny and staticky?
- Wakk Skylicker: No. She's just very, very cute.
- Brain-2-Me-2: Are you Slappy Wanna Nappy?
- Slappy Wanna Nappy: Who wants to know?
- Wakk Skylicker: I'm Wakk Skylicker. My new talking garbage can has a message for you.
- Slappy Wanna Nappy: He looks more like a toaster oven to me.
- Brain-2-Me-2: [sighs] May we come in and explain?
- Slappy Wanna Nappy: As long as you promise to heat up my frozen waffles. I'm starving.
- Brain-2-Me-2: What I go through for galactic conquest.
- Princess Dot: [in the projection] This minifridge contains the plans to the Megastar, Girth Plotz's ultimate weapon of destruction. The Megastar must be stopped! Help me, Slappy Wanna Nappy, please! All right! Who took the last diet root beer?
- Wakk Skylicker: She sounds like she's in trouble.
- Slappy Wanna Nappy: With a plot line that lame, we're all in trouble.
- Wakk Skylicker: Who are you?
- Yakk Soho: Yakk Soho, space ace, reporting for duty. This is my copilot, Chewbooboo.
- Chewbooboo: Rrrr Bawka!
- 3-Pinky-O: His copilot's a chicken, I tell ya! A giant chicken!
- Yakk Soho: Not if you keep a nightlight turned on.
- Girth Plotz: I'm tired of your stalling. Maybe this will persuade you to talk.
- Princess Dot: [gasps] My home!
- Girth Plotz: Yes. The comedy planet. Where I'll put the Megastar to its first test.
- Princess Dot: You're going to destroy my planet, wiping out millions of people?
- Girth Plotz: No. I'm going to screw up their TV reception!
- Princess Dot: [gasps] You... are... sick!
- Slappy Wanna Nappy: Hey, what's goin' on? Somethin' awful has happened.
- 3-Pinky-O: Narf! As though a million voices cried out in pain?
- Slappy Wanna Nappy: Worse. Scooby Doo's been preempted by a documentary on paddleball.
- Skippoda: Easy is drama. Hard is comedy. Yes, yes.
- Wakk Skylicker: But, Skippoda, what is comedy?
- Skippoda: All that is funny around us, it is. A better place it makes the universe. Yes.
- Slappy Wanna Nappy: Hurry it up, will ya, Skippy? We ain't got all day here.
- Skippoda: Cranky, she is. My Aunt Slappy, she is.
- Flabby the Butt: We had a deal, Soho!
- Yakk Soho: Now, Flabby, I can explain.
- Flabby the Butt: You promised to deliver a pizza to me... in 30 parsecs or less.
- Yakk Soho: Hey, come on, it was in the middle of a meteor shower.
- Flabby the Butt: You failed, and now you die!
- Yakk Soho: Seems a bit harsh, don't ya think? Why not just cut back on the tip?
- Hello Nurse: [about Brain-2-Me-2] Say, isn't that the minifridge General Plotz has been looking for?
- Dr. Otto Scratchensniff: Gee, I don't know. Zat looks more like a bread maker.
- Hello Nurse: No, no, no, no, no. I have one of those. Maybe it's a crock pot. Or a space heater.
- Dr. Otto Scratchensniff: No. I-It's, uh... uh...
- Brain-2-Me-2: A... floor polisher!
- Hello Nurse: Huh? Oh, sure! That's it!
- Dr. Otto Scratchensniff: Ja! You is a floor polisher.
- 3-Pinky-O: You are?
- Brain-2-Me-2: [hits 3-Pinky-O] Yes! And... my colleague and I have been assigned to polish all the floors in the Megastar!
- Dr. Otto Scratchensniff: Oh! Zat's nice.
- Brain-2-Me-2: And we'll start by cleaning the coffee-stained floors of the very control room where Girth Plotz beams his programming to poor, unsuspecting planets.
- Dr. Otto Scratchensniff: Ja! Zat's a good place to start. Okay. Bye-bye. Have ze funzies, now.
- 3-Pinky-O: And all this time, I thought we were robots.
- [Brain-2-Me-2 hits him]
- Wakk Skylicker: Hi! We've come to rescue you!
- Princess Dot: My brother!
- Wakk Skylicker: My sister!
- Yakk Soho: My siblings!
- Wakk Skylicker: My favorite Martian!
- Princess Dot: My friend, Flicka!
- Yakk Soho: My left foot!
- [Dr. Scratchensniff appears]
- Dr. Otto Scratchensniff: My, my, my!
- [the Warners scream and run away]
- Slappy Wanna Nappy: Girth Plotz. I haven't seen you since you took my cartoons off the air.
- Girth Plotz: Yes. Because they made no sense!
- Slappy Wanna Nappy: No. Because you have no sense of humor!
- Slappy Wanna Nappy: [as Girth Plotz and Wakk Skylicker fight] Work it, kid. That's it. Go for the punch line.
- Wakk Skylicker: Hey, I thought you just died!
- Slappy Wanna Nappy: Nah, dying's too easy. It's comedy that's hard.