- Blair Waldorf: As his consort, I have to be able to hobnob with oligarchs and dictators.
- Serena van der Woodsen: Well, if you can't find common ground with a dictator, I don't know who can.
- Blair Waldorf: She made 'Waldorf' rhyme with 'Spears'! I may as well have gone commando and held my party at Nyla's Burger Basket!
- Serena van der Woodsen: Blair Waldorf, a fling? You're not exactly low maintenance.
- Blair Waldorf: It's like Roman Holiday but I'm Gregory Peck and he's Audrey Hepburn!
- Serena van der Woodsen: And you really expect me to believe this isn't all about revenge on Chuck?
- Blair Waldorf: Revenge is so 12 hours ago! And just because Marcus is the perfect post-Bass palate cleanser doesn't mean he isn't a delicious dish in his own right.
- Gossip Girl: [voice-over] Chuck's date and Blair's date are mother and son! And Blair and Nate are exes! And Nate and the mother are in a book club. Now there's a novel twist!
- Blair Waldorf: Can I just say how sorry I am that I judged you earlier? I thought you were just a callow, social-climbing former swimsuit model who married above her station only to be enslaved by her own insecurities. When I saw you rolling around on the floor with my adolescent ex, I realized you have a compassionate side.
- Chuck Bass: [re Lord Beaton] No one is that perfect. Once we get him out of the way, I'll have a clear shot at Blair.
- Nate Archibald: Oh, you know it's love when you start talking like an assassin.
- Serena van der Woodsen: [on phone, to her best friend] Blair Waldorf a fling? Hmm. You're not exactly low maintenance.
- [first lines]
- Gossip Girl: [voice-over] As summer comes to an end, I'd like to share a few things I've learned about fun in the sun. Gossip Girl's Guide to Summer, tip number one: Don't fall asleep on the job. The best hookups are free of morning breath and awkward conversation.
- [a couple lies sleeping on the beach]
- Gossip Girl: The only thing harder than making up is waking up.
- [song goes "How deep is your ocean, how high is your sky?"]
- Dan Humphrey: [wakes up] Uh... Hey.
- Serena van der Woodsen: Hi.
- [they kiss]
- Serena van der Woodsen: Morning. Mm.
- [reaches for blouse, slips it on]
- Dan Humphrey: What?
- Serena van der Woodsen: I'm sorry. I... I'm just a little...
- Dan Humphrey: Overwhelmed?
- Serena van der Woodsen: Confused.
- [sighs]
- Serena van der Woodsen: Last night was...
- Dan Humphrey: It was amazing.
- [they kiss]
- Serena van der Woodsen: And confusing.
- [chuckles]
- Dan Humphrey: Okay. Now I'm... I'm a little confused.
- Serena van der Woodsen: Well, it was so romantic, what you did, showing up here... And it feels so right to be together...
- Dan Humphrey: But you're having second thoughts.
- Serena van der Woodsen: No, I... I just think that we should think... before we get back together. Right?
- Dan Humphrey: Yeah. Yeah, I mean, I thought this meant we were back together.
- [long passionate kiss...]
- Serena van der Woodsen: [... from which she breaks free] Uh-uh, uh-uh, uh-uh...
- Dan Humphrey: I'm sorry, I'm sorry...
- Serena van der Woodsen: No, you're not.
- Dan Humphrey: I'm not.
- [Serena chuckles]
- Dan Humphrey: At all!
- [more laughter from Serena]
- Serena van der Woodsen: And neither am I. And I wanna keep it that way. But this is a big decision, and we did break up for a reason. Many reasons. But this was never our problem.
- [they kiss again]
- Serena van der Woodsen: Okay. I will see you back in the city.
- [plants kiss]
- Serena van der Woodsen: Fully clothed, with lots of people around. Okay?
- Dan Humphrey: Okay.
- Serena van der Woodsen: [walks off, turns back] We'll talk.
- Dan Humphrey: [buttons shirt] Yeah, about our problems.
- [as she walks away:]
- Dan Humphrey: That sounds great.
- Blair Waldorf: [introduction to Lord Beaton] Dan is a football fanatic.
- [chuckles]
- Blair Waldorf: He's a huge Chelsea fan.
- Serena van der Woodsen: Oh, me too. I just love the Balenciaga store.