- Theresa Russo: Honey, I got rid of that thing for a reason. Family game night nearly destroyed this family. Don't you remember? The fighting, the cheating, the crying when someone lost.
- Jerry Russo: But that's because the kids were young. I think they're old enough to handle it now.
- Theresa Russo: They weren't the ones who were crying.
- Alex Russo: [whispers] I have two brains inside my head.
- Justin Russo: If you're trying to psyche me out for charades, you're gonna have to do better than that.
- Alex Russo: No-no-no, I'm serious. I mixed up a bunch of spells and now I've got Harper's brain in my head. I can prove it. Just talk to Harper's brain.
- Justin Russo: Okay, let me... let me see. Hello, Harper's... brain.
- [Alex supresses a loving giggle]
- Alex Russo: [as Harper] You're staring at me with those eyes. I think I might faint.
- [Last lines]
- Harper: I didn't want to look in your brain. There's a lot of scary stuff in there.
- Alex Russo: [Alex laughs evilly] Thank you.
- Justin Russo: Oh Alex, I need to ask you something. See I'm taking this girl to the baseball game, right?
- Alex Russo: What girl? Who are you taking?
- Justin Russo: Daphne. She thinks we're dating. I need your sneaky conniving advice of how to get out of it.
- Alex Russo: [as Harper] Dump her. Just dump her! Dump her hard!
- [as Alex, Groans]
- Alex Russo: You want to get rid of her? You're gonna need a road flare, a barrel of maple syrup, and a mini-trampoline. But we're not using the maple syrup the way you think.
- [Leading Alex out]
- Alex Russo: We gotta go!
- Jerry Russo: Alex, you're just in time for Family Game Night.
- Alex Russo: Oh, sorry I don't play games, especially ones that end with crime scene tape.
- [intentionally loud]
- Theresa Russo: Oh, it's so great to play a civilized game of charades with the family. That's right, we're out here playing charades in a friendly, family way!
- Neighbor: Quiet down there, ya nut!
- Alex Russo: Ok Harper, maybe I should just try another spell.
- [as Harper]
- Alex Russo: Let's see, my brain is cramped inside your head and I'm standing over there looking lost like my Dad when I talk about the internet. Sure, try another spell, how could it get any worse?
- [as Alex]
- Alex Russo: Ok Harper, I know we can do this if we just put our heads together.
- [as Harper]
- Alex Russo: Well, our heads can't get any more together and that doesn't seem to be helping!