MadWorld (2009 Video Game)

John DiMaggio: Kreese Kreely

Quotes 

• Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : There's nobody left to kill!

  Kreese Kreely : Yeah, but he could go back and defile the bodies.

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : What do you mean?

  Kreese Kreely : You know... make trophies and stuff. Check out my necklace of human ears.

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : Check out my stream of projectile vomit! blaaargh!

• Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : It's my favorite time of day again!

  Kreese Kreely : Ooh, time to huff some paint?

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : No.

  Kreese Kreely : Time to take a dump?

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : No.

  Kreese Kreely : Well then I give up, what time is it?

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : Time for another Bloodbath Challenge!

  Kreese Kreely : Well if you need me, I'll be taking a dump while huffing some paint.

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : So predictable.

• Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : Auntie Em! Auntie Em! It's a twister!

  Kreese Kreely : Dude, you are so gay.

• Kreese Kreely : I picked up an extra life once and came back as a roach!

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : Sounds like you got the wheel of karma extra life.

  Kreese Kreely : Actually I kind of liked it. Did you know a cockroach can live for a month without it's head?

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : Big deal! I went through eight years of marrage without any head.

• Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : I like to wash my pills down with a little scotch.

  Kreese Kreely : I like to wash my scotch down with a little more scotch.

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : I like to wash the scotch I washed the scotch down with, with a little more scotch.

  Kreese Kreely : I like scotch!

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : I like scotch!

• Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : When those wankers wobble you can do any fucked up shit you want to em'.

  Kreese Kreely : Same principle as roofies!

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : You are one sick puppy.

• Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : [Jack impales an enemy on a spiked wall]  Now THAT was another solution to a thorny problem!

  Kreese Kreely : Wow, the shit you say sometimes makes me wanna smack you.

• Kreese Kreely : Ya know, I like a gal that sucks as much as the next guy, but this blood-hungry bitch can give you a hickey that'll put you in the morgue. Y'know, I fought her in the Eastern Block games, and lost the match, four pints of plasma, and I was declared legally dead for a week.

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : Awesome rack on her, though!

  Kreese Kreely : True that. While you're blinded by her headlights, she'll sic her swarm of bastard bats on ya to mess up your shit. Plus, the fuckers have fleas!

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : Awesome rack on her, though!

  Kreese Kreely : True that!

• Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : And here come the Shamans!

  Kreese Kreely : The bleeding hearts out there whine that "fur is murder" and in this case they're abso-fucking-loutely right, this pack of mangy mother fuckers chewed my ass off in the Oklahoma games and to this day I still shit a little crooked!, when you hear them howl get ready for a rabid mauling from the whole savage pack!

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : I didn't know you shot crooked?

  Kreese Kreely : A little bit, a little bit

• Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : Callously carved cadavers, violent vivisections, and just plain crazy science gone wrong!

  Kreese Kreely : SCIENCE!

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : THAT'S what's hidden behind the blood-spattered walls of the castle's monstrous laboratory. Anyone dumb enough to walk into this butcher shop unprepared, is likely to wind up with an electrode up his ass, and six pig tits grafted to his back!

  Kreese Kreely : Seven. The sewed one on my stomach, too.

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : Dude, awesome! Can I touch it?

  Kreese Kreely : [Slyly]  Go ahead.

• Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : That guy has more poles sticking out of him than my ex-wife on a Friday night!

  Kreese Kreely : Also, he's spiked against the wall, and he's leaking fluids on the floor!

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : The similarities are UNCANNY!

• Kreese Kreely : [Jack has impaled an enemy on a spike, anus first]  That reminds me, I need to make an appointment to see my proctologist.

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : Why, anything serious?

  Kreese Kreely : No, right now, we're just friends.

  Howard 'Buckshot' Holmes : Ba-da ba, ba-da bum!