Cat Run (2011) User Reviews

Nice B-movie

[kosmasp · 7/10 · 10 May 2012]

With a very stellar cast. Paz Vega beautiful as ever, but also some acting heavyweights in there too. The action is filmed nicely and the fact this aimed for an adult audience (with the action and the erotic situations, though still tending to go for funny most of the time) really helped it. DL Hughley has a small part in this (most of him that is, which you'll get after watching the movie), but he is really something in it. Very funny indeed.

The story is nothing special and the coincidences might be a bit too much for some. But it has charm and charisma and if you have a heart for those small budget movies, you might find it entertaining enough to actually like ... like I did.

Heavy Handed Direction and Lack of Humor in a Rip-off of Guy Ritchie Style

[claudio_carvalho · 5/10 · 10 January 2012]

The Andorran call girl and single mother Catalina "Cat" Rona (Paz Vega) is hired to participate in an orgy in Montenegro with other escorts and powerful men and the American Senator William Krebb (Christopher McDonald). Something goes wrong with the politician and all the girls are murdered by the security of the host to avoid witnesses. However Cat escapes and brings a hard-drive with classified information with her. There is a manhunt for Cat and the cruel assassin Helen Bingham (Janet McTeer) is hired to retrieve the HD and kill Cat.

Meanwhile the Americans Julian Simms (Alphonso McAuley) and Anthony Hester (Scott Mechlowicz) decide to open a detective agency to raise money. When they see on the newspaper that Cat is being chased, they decide to seek her out expecting to receive a reward. However, they cross the path of Helen and they end protecting Cat from the killer. When Helen is betrayed by those who had hired her, she decides to help Anthony, Julian and Cat to retrieve the HD and their freedom.

"Cat Run" is an action-comedy with a heavy handed direction and lack of humor in a rip-off of Guy Ritchie style. Unfortunately the plot is silly and absurd and never works. In addition, Alphonso McAuley is not funny and Helen Bingham is a cliché of other assassins. My vote is five.

Title (Brazil): "Gata em Fuga" ("Cat in Flight")

Excellent.. deserving better than the 5.2

[unomeyetudont · 7/10 · 16 June 2012]

The movie has everything to keep you engrossed for its 100 min..

the right amount of comedy by the amateur detectives(the actors are authentic in their roles), the overall thrill,the good pace,good visuals..The editing has taken care that you don't have to suffer even a single dull moment And outstanding performance by Janet McTeer as one of the coolest and most efficient killers I have seen in such kind of movies..

The beauty and glamor of Paz Vega could have been handled more effectively..

After all, it is not very often we across thrillers/actions which have right amount of comedy and entertainment

Sort of Entertaining

[swedish_chef_dave · 3 November 2011]

This movie was a classic B Movie that just fell short of propelling the stars to A status. The totally forgettable 3 main actors were out of character as this was neither a comedy or a thriller, so the way they portrayed it was just wrong. The leading assassin who stole the show with her portrayal of a cold blooded killer was the best part of the movie but it was over acted and it was only 2 steps away from being Austin Powers. It could have been so great but the poor acting ruined it, it could have been funny but the poor acting ruined it, it was badly scripted but the cinematography was excellent, it had so many good points but far too many bad points to recommend it.

Shallow, misdirected waste of time

[NateWatchesCoolMovies · 3/10 · 10 June 2017]

Cat Run is a useless, needlessly crass and unpleasant piece of pseudo euro-pulp garbage with not a redeeming factor in sight. It tries its best to do the whole assassin mad dash a-lá Smokin Aces and such, but there's no heart, no discernible frequency to jive with and it ends up so thoroughly dead on arrival that you can feel the lack of pulse simply by watching a hastily cut trailer. The story is a glossy parade of silenced pistols, broad characterizations and graphic genre prototypes that offers nothing fresh, beginning with a murder scandal involving a scumbag politician (Christopher 'Shooter McGavin' McDonald) and a high class escort (Paz Vega). This causes subsequent fallout and bloodshed as all kinds of freaks and lowlifes come crawling out of the woodwork. They include two moronic would-be businessmen (Eurotrip's Scott Mechlowicz and Alphonso McCauley), a mysterious oddball (DJ Hughley) an Eastern European mobster nutjob (always cool to see Karel Roden) and Helen Bingham, a ferocious assassin played by British thesp Janet McTeer. They've made her character excessively, ridiculously arch and violent, hovering so far over the top she flies into orbit. The thing about these low rent, hard boiled, high octane ensemble capers is that you have to have a balance, a flow of all energies involved that stays streamlined and congruent. Smokin Aces had that (its sequel ran on an empty tank, but that's another story), as a good example of the recipe done right. This one just feels aloof and awkward, nothing to say and no amount of high style to distract us from the lack of proper story. It amazes me that they churned out a sequel this year, which I'll be avoiding, I think.

Wow, this movie was explosive entertainment all the way to the end...

[paul_haakonsen · 7/10 · 2 June 2012]

"Cat Run" was really an explosive surprise of a movie. I hadn't expected this at all.

The story in "Cat Run" is one of multiple facets. First we have the story of longtime friends Anthony Hester (played by Scott Mechlowicz) and Julian Simms (played by Alphonso McAuley) who team up to make a private investigator company and end up hot on the trail on a rather big case. American senator Bill Krebb (played by Christopher McDonald) is doing shady business in Eastern Europe and is caught on video with prostitutes, a video he doesn't want to go public, and this event was Catalina Rona (played by Paz Vega) witness to. Hired to clean up the loose ends and the mess is professional hit(wo)man Helen Bingham (played by Janet McTeer).

Essentially it is a high-octane thriller of cat-and-mouse chase mixed up with some spy activity, and just the right amount of comedy. And the end result was awesome.

I found "Cat Run" to be incredibly entertaining, both story-wise, action-wise and comedy-wise. This movie had all the ingredients required for a great movie.

The action sequences in the movie were really great, nicely choreographed, and could easily as well have been something right out of a James Bond movie. Thumbs up on that. And thumbs up for Janet McTeer, she was off the charts in the action sequences.

The people cast for the roles in "Cat Run" were doing really good jobs with their characters. Especially Janet McTeer, she was really the driving force behind this movie.

If you like action movies, like spy movies, and like comedy movies, then you definitely owe it to yourself to sit down and watch "Cat Run", because it is well worth it. Great entertainment from start till end.

Most of the boobs are at the beginning....

[mikeintheusa · 3/10 · 16 August 2012]

...which is a good thing as its the most compelling part of this 1 hour 40 minute plus borefest. Catch that bit and then move on to something else.

IMDb requires ten lines of text so I'll take the rest of this space to write as much as I know about owls. I generally like owls though I rarely see them in the wild. There are white owls, and brown owls, blue owls and red owls. Some owls are large, others are smallish - but not so small as to be a hummingbird.

If I could be reincarnated as a bird I think an owl would be near the top of my list, but it would not be as preferable as an eagle, or a hawk, or a jay..... Overall owls are around an 8 out of 10 as far as my bird rankings go. Cat Run as a film however would be about a 3 out of 10. Montenegro seems like a very nice spot to take a vacation....

It Could been....

[jbar19 · 6/10 · 10 December 2011]

This is proof that money, gorgeous women, solid acting and beautiful locales cannot overcome a silly, unbelievable story.

The story starts out as a buddy movie with 2 goofy American guys starting a business in Europe. Then, they cross paths with the gorgeous Cat and all hell breaks loose. The focus of the story then changes to another 'bad American govt official in cahoots with ruthless Eastern European arms dealers". And then it gets REALLY silly. And not fun silly. They tried to throw in a few jokes but it is just a muddled mess.

The Un-believability factor is ridiculously high. You'd think that Europeans hear gun shots all of the time and do nothing about it.

But, if there is a reason to see this movie it is Janet McTeer who steals every scene she is in, doing a better impression of Helen Mirren than even Helen Mirren can do. She is cold, ruthless, efficient and believable, to a certain extent.

It started out as a Guy Ritchie type movie, devolves into overblown James Bond type silliness and then the bodies start stacking up like cord wood.

The 2 lowest points are the African American guy doing a Scottish Accent and then later, getting everyone out of a jam by picking up his kilt. Dumb, Dumb, Dumb.

The 2 main guys are very likable but under used, Paz Vega started out as the star but then acts as scenery, not even DL Hughley can save it in the 90 seconds of screen time he gets.

This could have been a good movie. They spent a lot of money making it. They should have spent more time writing it. This movie is under cooked.

Watch it with low expectations. And enjoy the eye candy. That's it.

Ridiculous, unnecessary violence

[debsharley · 1/10 · 4 November 2013]

This movie is disgusting. It is disturbingly violent. It loses all credibility because it's practically unwatchable. How to get 10 lines in here so my review will post. Good question. I've said all I need to say in two lines. The movie severely sucks. It is violence beyond violence. Probably one of the most horrid movies I have ever seen in my life. I tried to post using dots...it would most assuredly not let me. So now I am just filling this with random words to get it to post. This is dumb that I have to keep typing just to get this to post. This is just a bad movie. Don't get this movie. Terrible beyond words. Okay, that's nine lines, this is ten lines. Let's see if it will post.

Good action flick

[TdSmth5 · 7/10 · 8 December 2014]

A bunch of prostitutes go to a fancy party. Among them is Cat and a friend of hers. Among the guests is an American ambassador. The palatial house is owned by a mean guy named Carver. When the ambassador gets rough and kills one of the girls, all hell breaks lose. Carver decides to kill all the girls. Cat manages to escape.

Next morning while on the run she makes a phone call at a restaurant owned by Anthony. She steals his car and his friend's phone. Around this time the friend, named Julian, proposes they start a private detective business. Anthony eventually agrees. They get an "office" in a porn theater, hire a guy missing 3 limbs as an assistant, and take on the "case" of finding Cat.

Also looking for her is Carver. As it turns out Cat stole a hard drive of his with evidence of all sorts of wrongdoings. He hires a hitwoman Helen, a prim and proper English woman. And she's mean. She and the two morons follow the same trail--Cat's family in Spain, her pimp, and eventually the two find Cat just as Helen finds them all. They barely manage to escape. When Helen fails to do her job, Carver sends a hit-man after her. That causes Helen to join forces with the other 3, who now go after the ambassador and Carver. They crash another one of his parties and violence and the resolution ensues.

This movie is not at all what it seems like. Cat is a very secondary character, and no, she isn't not some action chick. Initially it's all about the two fools chasing after Cat. And they make terrible lead characters. Since they are so weak, the appearance of Helen livens things up considerably, except that she it detestable. Things improve when the Scottish hit-man appears but unfortunately he's there only for a short time. While the characters are lame, the story is alright and the action is pretty good. This movie delights in some of the extremes it shows. The settings in Serbia are pretty neat and interesting. Overall a fairly decent movie that's at times annoying but overall entertaining and action packed.

Nails + Chalkboard = Razors + Wrists

[chow913 · 1/10 · 19 November 2012]

Nails + Chalkboard = Razors + Wrists 'Cat Run' has a few funny moments and great Eastern European setting. However it cannot overcome a flawed story and more importantly really really bad actors over acting with dialogue written by a 10 year old boy.

The plot: As improbable as it is, American military industrial tycoon Christopher McDonald (the only professional actor in this film) orders the deaths of ALL the prostitutes at a brothel party after he strangles one of them.

Instead of simply covering up the minor murder of a prostitute during ruff sex, McDonald's private army of tuxedo clad, sub machinegun brandishing henchmen shoot up the entire mansion. (Isn't this going to be far more difficult to cover up?) But the henchmen simply allow hooker with a heart of gold Cat to run away (still in high heels) with a video of the original strangulation.

Enter Americans Scott Mechlowiz and Alphonso McAuley. Since no words can describe the pain of this duo, try to imagine being locked in a steel drum with Pauly Shore and Howie Mandel. Yes, it really is that bad.

For reasons never explained these destitute fools end up successfully tracking the wanted Cat all across Europe from country to country on a seemingly unlimited travel budget.

They also find themselves at odds with the professional assassin and torturer hired by McDonald, to also find Cat. The vicious assassin, Janet McTeer, parades herself as a British nanny. Much like Sylvester Stallone in 'Rhinestone' and Arnold Schwarzenegger in 'Junior.' The fish out of water scenario is so over the top, it's just plain unfunny.

The "plot" also does a complete 180 on us when the sadistic assassin we're supposed to fear and hate for torturing innocent victims to dead, suddenly switches sides and becomes a caring and selfless heroine whom wants to help Cat and crush McDonald.

Of course the mindless heroes mindlessly accept McTeer as their ally, mindlessly forgetting all wrongs.

Sadly, McTeer is the least annoying of the over acting assassins. They're more. Many more. Like a Scotsman whom resembles Fat Bastard from the 'Austin Powers' films. Except, 'Cat Run' is supposed to be and action comedy, not a slapstick comedy. Hence these henchmen all come across as out of place very annoying.

The single biggest nail on the chalkboard is the screenplay itself which seems to be written by a 10 year old boy who thinks any type of vulgarity is funny. It's not! And someone should have stopped this script in its tracks from ever being turned into a movie.

Crude humor can be done well but this script totally ignores the second part, the humor. The vulgarity needs a punch line. A joke cannot be just 4 letters long.

Great entertainment and even better action sequences

[xandycaven · 9/10 · 1 April 2011]

Contracted assassins, government corruption, high octane action scenes; Cat Run has it all. I thoroughly enjoyed watching this movie as it provided exactly what I wanted out of this flick, entertainment. Recommended to anyone is who seeking an all around great action thriller. It also contains one very gorgeous actress, Ms. Paz Vega(Spanglish), who plays the main character of a beautiful escort. Movie contains elements of comedy, action, slight gore, and of course beautiful women. A must see for anyone who wants to sit down and enjoy a flick and be nothing more than entertained.

...

....

An entertaining movie that would have been better if a few scenes were cut. Never felt consistent. Worth a watch though. I say B

[cosmo_tiger · 6/10 · 27 December 2011]

"She wanted it, she told me to." Catalina (Vega) and her escort friends are at a high end party when senator Bill Krebb (McDonald) goes to far and one of the girls ends up dead. Catalina takes the tape and runs. An assassin is hired to find her and and get the tape back. Catalina finds two private investigators who are just starting up to help her. This is a movie that was actually pretty good, but the big problem was that it was a little too long. There were some really exciting and fun action scenes and tense moments in this, but there were also some very slow paced and unnecessary scenes that slowed the movie down and kept it from being consistent the entire time. Equal parts action and comedy made it a fun watch, but nothing to rush out and see either. Overall, an entertaining movie that is worth watching once but that's about it. I give it a B.

Dog Walk

[CuriosityKilledShawn · 1/10 · 7 June 2014]

You know how carnies have that knack of making you part with your cash by pretending that they can read your palm or tea leaves? That's what this movie reminds me of. I assume that the script for Cat Run was interpreted from scrunched-up toilet paper after a bout of diarrhea brought on by food poisoning from cheap kebab meat. If you gave mentally subnormal 8-year-olds toy guns and told them to run riot in the back yard they'd come up with a better plot behind the gunplay than whoever was responsible for the script to his breathtakingly abysmal film.

Cat (Paz Vega - who?) is at some political orgy shindig in Eastern Europe when everyone is suddenly killed and she finds herself marked for death and on the lam because "she knows". Many characters come and go over the running time, most of which seem to be occupying their own story as the movie feels very disconnected.

I've seen many poorly edited films in my time, but Cat Run wins the top prize by a million miles. Characters warp through space and time with no coherence or cohesion. Cat Run feels like three separate terrible movies chucked into a blender, fed to pigs, collected as feces, then painted on the screen in brown smears. It is truly, mind-bogglingly, jaw-droppingly, agonizingly terrible.

The worst part of this brain torture is that Cat Run actually thinks it is smart and funny. John Stockwell's "direction" makes you long for the crude, childish eye candy of Michael Bay. It will even make you forgive Guy Richie for all his previous sins. Nothing, but nothing about this drek can possibly be any worse.

Shame on all involved. Who would want this on their resume? If you dropped Cat Run in a public toilet bowl it would regurgitate it back in your face.

You honestly think that there are worse films than this? There's not. At least Tommy Wiseau's The Room had some shred of nobility, no matter house misguided.

Do let this film come within a 100-mile radius of your life.

Amateur and cardboard acting but stylish

[phulla · 2/10 · 28 February 2021]

The only thing I enjoyed was the style of the movie, though having said that, the use of pop up narrative was on screen for absolutely no time at all and found myself rewinding just to read the text.

The acting was so bad I didn't even bother with the film because I didn't want to waste time watching this poor excuse for a movie. I understand budget constraints and limited availability of good actors but I have to say scraping the barrel shouldn't have been the top priority.

Somebody might enjoy all the tits and ass in this movie but that's all it was, tits and ass.

No URLs in reviews

[angelicardour · 6/10 · 28 July 2014]

Anthony has done his best to distance himself from his family. He even moved out of the U.S. and opened a restaurant on another continent. Business wound up kind of sucking and when his best friend finds him and gives him the idea to start a detective agency he folds. Their first case, though, takes them further into danger than they ever expected.

I hate the word "derivative." In fact, the only time you'll ever see it used in one of my reviews is when I'm making fun of it. Why? Well, when a critic uses the word to describe a movie, they're basically just saying that the film was imitating another one. In a lot of cases, I find that it's less imitation and more inspiration. I mean, directors grow up watching movies and honed their styles in the memory of their favorites, right? So almost every one of them has been inspired by something someone else made. If a critic simply means the movie is cookie cutter or unimaginative – then they should just say that. I feel like it's just a word those people use to sound more elitist.

Cat Run was not well liked by critics. I think the lot of them were watching the wrong movie or something, because I thought the film was hilarious.

There's a lot of sex and nudity, but considering the main plot it makes sense for there to be a lot of sexuality. There was also the buddy- detective aspect because of the two main characters. Most of Cat Run actually seemed like an episode of Psyche with different actors. It did have some relatively original parts, though, and I thought the characters came alive through the actors.

There were some plot holes. The only one that I can mention without adding a spoiler alert, however, is that it's never explained why Anthony has such superior observation skills (his skills are revealed roughly 10 minutes into the movie). I would have liked to know the story behind it.

Another take on modern grind-house cinema

[Anton Versluys · 5/10 · 23 June 2012]

This movie is a pretty graphic example of modern grind-house cinema: It's misanthropic, misogynistic, obnoxiously sadistic and gross. However, it has the moral reserve of not taking itself too seriously, reaching its highlights in scenes plenty of tasteless humor. Even the promos are slightly deceitful as the main storyline has much less to do with the female lead, Catalina "Cat" Rona (The once-promising Spanish actress Paz Vega) than a couple of unlucky globe trotters (Scott Mechlowicz and Alphonso McAuley), both involved into a merciless pursuit across Europe. In fact, "Cat" is far from the image of the female hero and she actually plays her part as a vulnerable, rather passive woman in peril which only serves as main prize to a bunch of soulless thugs.

Perhaps the most (or should I have to say, the only) memorable and well developed character in this gallery of grotesque is the strict mannered and cold-blooded British assassin portrayed by Janet McTeer, who plays a role as fun and weird as can be a cross between Mary Poppins and Terminator, but capable of humanity when the tide turns and the plot demands her to change her side. Very consistent and congruent to the exploitative spirit which drives the insane storyline, there is a large amount of nudity and violence against women, and some torture scenes definitely not for the squeamish.

"Cat Run" it's a violent buddy movie and adventure flick, more in tune to dark and grim movies like "Taken" and "Hostel", where the sense of thrill seems to come in direct proportion to the lack of humanity, and the result it still is enjoyable to anyone who enjoys falling downstairs. Yes, that painful.

Beautiful European Scenery with a cold blooded assassin, Janet Mcteer steels the show

[med77_99 · 7/10 · 28 August 2012]

I would agree with most on here that this movie is a flawed but entertaining R rated film.

its an action comedy movie that involves a female escort who witness a government cover up of a crime and is then hunted by the people trying to cover it up, aided by two unlikely private detectives to expose the crime and escape the ruthless assassins sent to eliminate her.

quite the simple plot yet filled with all sort of characters from funny and silly like Jullian played by Alphonso Mcauley to cold blooded killers like Helen played by Janet Mcteer who for me really stole the show with her brilliant performance as the British assassin, absolutely loved her ! the movie is a mixture of Action and Comedy which could work for and against the film, at times it felt like a Bond film, other times felt more like There is something about Marry !!

I mostly enjoyed the serious part of it, the mature violent kills and gory scenes, i also loved the setting of the film that took a wide tour through European countries capturing some beautiful scenery which added much to the movie.

Action scene were pulled off with perfection, gun fights and a final fist fight not to be missed.

In short, the movie was flawed in certain areas, but was actually pretty entertaining and worth a watch for sure, at least for Janet Mcteer's performance and some solid mature action. I say 7.5 out of 10

Action, comedy - really ?

[pkpera · 1/10 · 18 July 2022]

One of most disgusting and stupid movies what I ever - well, made mistake and watched .

So, what we saw in this : nudity, sex for money, swearing in every 3rd sentence, sadistic torturing, cutting off body parts (including genitals), killing innocent people without any real need, lot of blood ...

Action scenes were pretty much unrealistic, with lot of cuts (cheap and lazy way), and sometimes mad me laugh - worst was that flying of one of 'superheroine' 's victims after she kicked him . Man, she was not only super agent, she had super powers !

I don't care about acting in case like this - stupid dialogs, killings and gore in every 3rd scene, lot of plot holes, if we can talk about plot at all.

And maybe the worst: it was clearly in tone: English are superior . Yeah, something of it was present in James Bond movies, but this is from 2011 .

Licence to Kill would be more proper title - considering screen time of licensed one . Maybe copyrighted ? Or better: Great Fun Kills ..

A Hot Wet Mess

[rlipscomb-25676 · 6/10 · 13 July 2019]

This movie was fun, but the plot was a hot wet mess. Were Catalina Rona and Helen Bingham the protagonists, or were Alphonso McAuley and Scott Mechlowicz the protagonists? Either way would have been fin. I would have chosen the former.

Thanks to Ms. Vega and Ms. McTeer (and a bevy of beautiful nude women), I could not take my eyes off the individual scenes. I did not know whom I was pulling for.

A more sure-handed director would have made the necessary changes to the script and made a gem.

Not a good movie

[wjspears · 3/10 · 17 July 2022]

This movie is a clear example of the use of gratuitous violence to juice up a boring, and cliché ridden film.

It is hard to blame Janet McTeer for the character she plays-- a prim middle age British woman who happens to be an accomplished and ruthless assassin. But Helen Mirren did play the part better, and with more humor, the year before in the Bruce Willis movie, "Red".

The fault, however, doesn't really lie with Ms. McTeer, she is only doing what the script calls for her to do. Rather it is the talentless script writers and the director, John Stockwell, who directed this with no sense of subtlety. Which is a shame, because I thought Stockwell's "Crazy/Beautiful", with Kirsten Dunst, was actually a very touching movie about teenage self-destruction.

Here though, with Stockwell's direction, by the time you get midway through the movie, you are prepared that every time Janet McTeer appears on screen, someone is going to murdered in a fairly graphic display--the only tension is whether the victim is going to be tortured first. Predictability is a lot more serious enemy in any film, than an assassin can be.

I rate the movie 3 stars, and not less because of Janet McTeer's performance, which does attempt a certain black humor.

Paz Vega, who is the main reason why I chose to watch this movie, is poorly used here. The DVD cover has Paz crouching, with a high powered gun. This suggests that her character will be exacting some vengeance of her own, which might have had some cathartic appeal, but that virtually never happens.

Paz is simply a "damsel in distress" who is constantly on the run, with a small baby, no less!

Proves reviews can be misleading....

[callahans20 · 8/10 · 14 October 2012]

Before I watched this, I had never heard of Cat Run, or John Stockwell. I was bored on a Sunday night and this was sitting in one of my Netflix queues for weeks, so I thought, what the heck, let's give it a go. How bad can it be? For the first 30 minutes or so, I was thrown by the number of character introductions (made with graphics) so I distracted myself with my iPad only half-watching it. But then I started finding myself getting more and more drawn in by Janet McTeer's, Helen Bingham, as cold-blooded an assassin as you will ever see. Plus, she's kinda classy. This is really her movie, and without her, the story would be only average. I loved the line, "We'll always have Angola." The two private detectives are more comic relief than main characters, but the kilt dance made me laugh out loud for about 5 minutes. The supporting characters are numerous and familiar, which helps the story along. Paz Vega is pure window dressing.

Cat Run certainly won't win any awards, and most of the characters are rather predictable, but it was still great fun if you just don't take it too seriously. By the time the movie ended, I was thoroughly engrossed so maybe it helps to pay less attention in the beginning where the story truly bogs down. Perhaps tighter editing there would have aided the initial story flow.

All in all, Cat Run was better than a lot of reviewers give it credit for. You'd have to be a real movie snob not to enjoy it.

Bad Babes and Bungling Boys

[VeronikaRooWriter · 7/10 · 29 November 2014]

Don't let the fine china for a spot of tea fool you, the middle-aged woman (Janet McTeer as Helen Bingham) with a penchant for literary aliases is an assassin. Our heroes, Anthony Hester and Julian Simms (played by Scott Mechlowicz and Alphonso McAuley, respectively), shrug off their lack of experience as private eyes and rely on their desire to succeed, Anthony's money and a hand from D.L. Hugely as Dexter. Their first case is personal.

Catalina Rona (Paz Vega) enchants as the cat on the run. Bullets fly in slow motion, blood spurts, bodies mount and beautiful bare breasts serve as exclamation points in this enjoyable bromance. Clever but not cloying graphics punctuate the we-should-vacation-here Serbian scenery. Magicians and a cute baby round out the cast in this perfect for munching microwave popcorn action comedy.

a flick for the blokes

[trashgang · 7/10 · 16 May 2012]

John Stockwell did ring a bell, being a horror fan I remember Turistas (2006), a horror flick he also directed that had a lot of controversy concerning some operation scene's to be cut out to have a normal rating. This here isn't a horror but a pure entertaining flick.

But it is also that kind of flick you watch and forget afterwards because it isn't a major blockbuster. And people who are thinking that they will see a Mission Impossible or Bourne will be disappointed. This is pure fun and even not for kids to watch due the nudity involved which is full frontal, shaved and unshaven.

You also don't go watching it for the performances although I have to say that Janet McTeer as Helen Bingham is stunning. She gives away a stiff British performance but with literally a killing attitude. Due the nudity it's definitely one for the guys. There is also a bit of CGI gore here and there but I did dig it because it was done in slo-mo or POV from the bullet itself. There's a lot of action going on.

Still, for many the thespians will be unknown but some are familiar to the ones who love B-movies. Paz Vega (Cat) did the lead in Lucía Y El Sexo (2001). Tony Curran will be recognized by horror buffs from Midnight Meat Train (2008) and Shuttle (2008) or from blockbusters like Underworld (2006) and Gladiator (2000) for example.

But I do recommend it also for the ones who love action flicks with a bit of gore and humour. I laughed out loud with a few situations, especially when Alphonso McAuley who plays Julian Simms is transferred into a Scottish bloke (he's black) and of course he has to show he isn't wearing underwear, hilarious situation you couldn't see coming.

Ideal for an evening with your male friends, sexy chicks, nudity in the beginning, gory situations, and comedy. I loved it, Cat doesn't has to run for me.

Gore 1,5/5 Nudity 2,5/5 Effects 3/5 Story 3/5 Comedy 2/5

The brainless action black comedy that has its enchants!!

[elo-equipamentos · 6/10 · 16 February 2021]

Typical Hollywood action black humor comedy made on Eastern Europe, driven to teenager audiences supplying their fantasies on nudes scenes, prostitution, drugs, and an implausible plot to start, however the movie has many qualities, mainly focused in the wicked character of Helen Bingham (Janet McTeer) who steal the show, cold and a skillful hired killer, featuring the best sequences on those punitive measures, cutting fingers, nose and even balls, it all in highest style, the two detectives the black Julian Simms (McAuley) and the Anthony Hester (Scott Mechlowicz) has their fair moments, the supposedly sexy Catalina Rona (Paz Vega) didn't delivers nothing, aside the first orgy, all the remainder plays a ashamed girl, looks like my sister who entered in the nunnery.

therefore there are so many funny sequences, smutty and even tawdry by the way, it are delightfully amusing, a pen.is pump was one of them, when Julian belies the purchase, on the cripple assistant's life story to got the job is another highlight, so weird and lamest that became hilarious on black humor oriented, also when a Catalina's client displayed how tall the eja-culation reach on the wall is priceless although all off-collor, great brainless entertainment just for killing time!!

Thanks for reading.

Resume:

First watch: 2021 / How many: 1 / Source: Blu-Ray / Rating: 6.25