It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (TV Series)

A Very Sunny Christmas (2009)

Glenn Howerton: Dennis Reynolds

Photos 

Quotes 

• Dennis Reynolds : How are we doing over here?

  Dee Reynolds : Uh... Not well. This is ridiculous. People are definitely starting to notice.

  Dennis Reynolds : Of course they're starting to notice. There's a grown man crammed inside of a couch for Christ's sake. They're going to notice. So let's just talk to somebody. Can you grab that guy?

  Dee Reynolds : [to two office workers]  Hey you two!

  Dennis Reynolds : Heyyyyy! So how we doing at the Christmas party? We having a good time?

  Woman Office Worker : Yes, great time.

  Dee Reynolds : Great! So, uh... Frank Reynolds?

  [makes thumbs down motion] 

  Dennis Reynolds : Oh yeah, we were just talking about him. He's the worst, huh?

  Woman Office Worker : Do... Do you work here?

  Dennis Reynolds : ...Yeah, of course. Yeah, yeah. We hop around. Consultationists. So we consult here... we consult across the street too...

  Man Office Worker : Is there a man in that couch?

  Dennis Reynolds : Ha ha! What are you saying? A man in a couch? That's absurd!

  Man Office Worker : No, I believe there's a man in that couch right there!

  Dennis Reynolds : There is no man! There's no man! Say something things about Frank Reynolds, say them loud, and make sure they're horrible horrible things, then we'll deal with the man in the couch!

  Man Office Worker : Okay, so there is a man in the couch!

  Dee Reynolds : All right, just call Frank Reynolds an asshole!

  Man Office Worker : Who is Frank Reynolds?

  Dennis Reynolds : He's the man in the couch!

  Woman Office Worker : Oh, my God! What are you people doing?

  Dennis Reynolds : Would you just say something about Frank that's horrible? Call him an asshole!

  Woman Office Worker : Frank Reynolds is an asshole!

  [Frank tears a hole in the couch and climbs out naked and sweaty] 

• Dennis Reynolds : If you guys love Christmas so much, why do you always wait until the last possible minute to put up the Christmas decorations? It is the day before Christmas.

  Mac : That's our tradition.

  Charlie Kelly : Yeah, that's what we do. We drink a lot of eggnog. We pass out. And then we don't put anything up, so we do it at the last minute.

  Mac : Yeah, then we wake up at Christmas and celebrate by throwing rocks at moving freight trains.

  Dee Reynolds : Why would grown men throw rocks at trains?

  Mac : Why wouldn't we throw rocks at trains? It's beats throwing rocks at passing cars, or at people.

  Charlie Kelly : It's awesome. That's what you do on Christmas morning. We've been doing it since we were kids. Look, whatever. I'm sorry that we love Christmas and we have awesome Christmas traditions and you guys hate Christmas.

  Mac : They hate Christmas because I always got the best gifts, and Frank always gave them shitty presents.

  Dee Reynolds : You think we don't like Christmas because Frank gave us shitty presents?

  Dennis Reynolds : Is that really what you think? No, Frank didn't buy shitty presents. Frank bought the most awesome presents in the world. As a matter of fact, he would find out whatever Christmas presents we wanted that year... and he would buy them for himself instead of buying them for us.

  Charlie Kelly : Really? That must have been why he wanted me to walkie you guys when you got to the bar. 'Cause he was trying to do something about making your Christmas better. Or worse.

• Dennis Reynolds : See, the best part of Frank's story was how the four of us come together as a group to mercilessly slaughter him. You see what I'm saying? And I think that's what Christmas is really all about.