Community (TV Series)
Debate 109 (2009)
Chevy Chase: Pierce Hawthorne
Photos
Quotes
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Pierce Hawthorne : Now I gotta start the whole joke all over again. Okay, so this...
Britta : No!
[slams fist against the table]
Britta : I've got one for you. A doddering, old fool walks into a bar, tells a stupid joke, and I crush his windpipe with my 3-ring binder.
Shirley Bennett : [Giggles]
Shirley Bennett : I don't get it.
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Pierce Hawthorne : Britta, wake up! Oh, why did I put you under so well? Damn my talent!
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Pierce Hawthorne : [Jeff is wearing matching shirt and socks] By the way, Jeff, I think your shirt's trying to get out of your pants.
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Abed Nadir : [Abed, Shirley and Troy enter shot] Shirley, I don't have powers. Trust me. In my next film, we discover that Pierce is an actual genius.
Shirley Bennett : Well, that's not gonna happen.
Abed Nadir : No, it's not.
[Shirley and Troy exit shot]
Britta : [Britta and Pierce enter shot] Pierce, I can't smoke a cigarette without thinking of a three-way in your hot tub. You did it.
Pierce Hawthorne : Yes. I did?
Britta : You're a genius.
[Abed looks confused]
Pierce Hawthorne : Ah! Who's the third?
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Pierce Hawthorne : This is a real barn-burner.
[a look of confusion]
Pierce Hawthorne : God, did I just say cross-burner?
Shirley Bennett : [irritated] No, you did not.
Pierce Hawthorne : [quietly] Oh, good.