Mass Effect 2 (2010 Video Game)

Mark Meer: Commander Shepard - Male, Captain Kar'Danna, Niftu Cal, Prazza, Shelum, Shisk, Blasto, Blood Pack Boom-Squad, Blood Pack Trooper, Blue Suns Dispatcher, Eclipse Trooper, Elcor Bouncer, Elcor Customer, Joab Anomaly, Krogan Thug, Quarian Log, Refinery Worker, Sanctum Anomaly, Sick Krogan, Taitus Anomaly, Tarith Anomaly, Turian Customer, Turian Shopkeep, Urdnot Warrior, Volus Contact, Volus Customer, Vorcha Enemies, Eclipse Security Guard - Kasumi: Stolen Memory DLC, Party Guest - Kasumi: Stolen Memory DLC, Prison Guard - Arrival DLC

Photos 

Quotes 

• Commander Shepard : [ordering a drink while heavily intoxicated]  Put more of the stuff in the... the thing more stuff goes in.

• Commander Shepard : If you want to help Urdnot you'd need to get back there. But It would take a real bad-ass to make it back while injured.

  Sick Krogran : I can do it.

  Commander Shepard : You! I said a bad-ass not some scout whining like a quarian with a tummy-ache.

  Tali'Zorah : I'm standing right here!

• Commander Shepard : Have you got a minute?

  Garrus Vakarian : Can it wait for a bit? I'm in the middle of some calibrations.

• Flight Lieutenant Jeff 'Joker' Moreau : It'll be better than the old days... You'll see!

  Commander Shepard : I hope so... I died!

  Flight Lieutenant Jeff 'Joker' Moreau : Geez, you're such a downer!

• Commander Shepard : I'm sorry, I know that was important, but *you* performed Gilbert and Sullivan?

  Prof. Mordin Solus : [singing]  I am the very model of a scientist salarian - I've studied species Turian, Asari and Batarian - I'm quite good at genetics as a subset of biology - because I am an expert which I know is a tautology! My xenoscience studies range from urban to agrarian - I am the very model of a scientist salarian!

  [long pause] 

  Prof. Mordin Solus : Ahem.

• Commander Shepard : Have you got a minute to talk?

  Prof. Mordin Solus : Actually, wanted to talk. Medical matters. Aware that mission is dangerous, different species react differently to stress. Aware you come by a great deal. Have had other species become attracted to me before. Awkward. Not interested.

  Commander Shepard : You've had members of another species make a pass at you?

  Prof. Mordin Solus : Constantly. Very awkward. Skin tone apparently attractive by turian standards. Subset of krogan sexual deviants enjoy salarian flexibility. More cartilage in skeletal structure. Asari offers intriguing, actually. Wonder why. Transspecies pheremones unlikely to work. Must be neurochemical.

  Commander Shepard : Wait a minute Mordin, you're just yanking me around, aren't you?

  Prof. Mordin Solus : Shocking suggestion! Doctor-patient confidentiality a sacred trust. Would never dream of mockery. Enjoy yourself while possible Shepard. Will be here studying cell reproduction. Much simpler. Less alcohol and mood music required.

• Niftu Cal : I am a biotic god, I think things and they happen! Fear me, lesser creatures, for I am biotics made flesh!

  Commander Shepard : I don't know what drugs you're on, but stay back and I won't shoot you.

  Niftu Cal : You will regret your scandalous words! I am a great wind that will sweep all before me like a... a great wind! A great biotic wind! Yes, the asari injecting so many drugs into me was terrifying, But then I began to smell my greatness! They may laugh when I fall over, but they don't know what I know in my head... that I know that I am amazingly powerful! Fear me.

  Commander Shepard : Are you part of Pitne For's trade group?

  Niftu Cal : When I was mortal, I worked for Pitne. The poor soul is probably terrified that I have not returned.

  Jack : He didn't say anything about you going missing. Didn't want to get stuck here.

  Prof. Mordin Solus : Pitne picks money over friends. Unsurprising.

  Niftu Cal : Bah! I will wreak a just revenge upon his people! But first, the leader of these mercenaries is in the next room. I shall toss Wasea about like a rag doll!

  Zaeed : Shepard, want me to kneecap this guy so he doesn't follow us around?

  Jack : Fifteen creds says the little guy doesn't make it five steps in before the merc explodes him.

  Niftu Cal : I will tear her apart! My biotics are unstoppable!

  Commander Shepard : Charge.

  Niftu Cal : An ill wind blows upon Wasea, captain of the Eclipse sisters! After me!

  [Niftu Cal runs in and is immediately killed by Wasea] 

  Jack : That was mean. But damn funny.

• Commander Shepard : Heard about anything interesting going on around here?

  Turian bartender : I serve drinks. You want to know what's going on, check the news.

  [pause] 

  Turian bartender : I don't know why humans always ask me that.

• Commander Shepard : What do you think our chances are Garrus?

  Garrus Vakarian : Honestly? The Collectors have killed you once, and all it seems to have done is piss you off so...

• Commander Shepard : I trust you too Tali, but you don't have to prove anything to me.

  Tali'Zorah : I know... well no not that I know... it's just that... well... it's not normally like this... I mean, wow... when did it get so hot in here?

• Dr. Liara T'Soni : So tell me what you want. If this all ends tomorrow, what happens to us?

  Commander Shepard : I don't know. Marriage, old age, and a lot of little blue children?

• The Illusive Man : I made you, Shepard! I brought you back from the dead!

  Commander Shepard : And I'm going to do what you brought me back to do. I'll fight and win this war without compromising the soul of our species.

• Dr. Liara T'Soni : She's got reinforcements!

  Commander Shepard : What kind of guns does this thing have?

  Dr. Liara T'Soni : It's a taxi! It has a fare meter!

  Commander Shepard : Wonderful.

• Dr. Liara T'Soni : [surrounded by enemy troops]  Their attacks are disorganized. They'd be more effective if they all attacked at once.

  Commander Shepard : Please don't give the mercs ideas.

  Dr. Liara T'Soni : [more troops arrive]  The next wave looks like a big one.

  Commander Shepard : You just had to give'em tactical advice.

  Dr. Liara T'Soni : But now there'll be fewer left to deal with inside.

  Commander Shepard : Keep dreaming, T'Soni.

• [If you bring Legion on Tali's loyalty mission] 

  Captain Kar'danna : Get that damn thing off my ship before you start an incident that makes the Ascension Project fiasco with Cerberus look like a slow day on garbage detail!

  Commander Shepard : When I take Tali aboard Council stations, the customs guys sometimes call her "that thing." This thing is named Legion.

  Captain Kar'danna : How about you step aside and we call it scrap metal?

  Legion : Our exterior shell is 72% polymer.

• Commander Shepard : You're awfully anxious to get Samara out of your district.

  Detective Anaya : My bosses want me to detain her. They're worried she'll cause some kind of cross-species incident. But her Justicar Code won't let her be taken into custody. If I try it, she'll have to kill me. I have no interest in dying, so if you lure her away with some big noble cause before I have to carry out my orders, I'm thrilled to help you.

  Commander Shepard : Your superiors are sending you to certain death for no good reason. You have a right to disobey.

  Legion : Shepard-Commander orders us to statistically probable death an average of 2.73 instances per day. Rounded down.

• Commander Shepard : You're awfully anxious to get Samara out of your district.

  Detective Anaya : My bosses want me to detain her. They're worried she'll cause some kind of cross-species incident. But her Justicar Code won't let her be taken into custody. If I try it, she'll have to kill me. I have no interest in dying, so if you lure her away with some big noble cause before I have to carry out my orders, I'm thrilled to help you.

  Commander Shepard : Your superiors are sending you to certain death for no good reason. You have a right to disobey.

  Prof. Mordin Solus : Good to know, given the number of times we're ordered into hazardous situations. Twice a day, on average.

• Miranda Lawson : I don't know what this is, if this is stress or just blowing off steam or...

  Commander Shepard : I care about you, Miranda. And I think you care about me.

  Miranda Lawson : This is no time for emotional entanglement! You and I know more about the Collectors than anyone, we know how unlikely it is we're coming back alive! What idiotic bunch of hormones thought that now was a great time for love?

  Commander Shepard : Who said anything about love? I'm just trying to get you into bed.

  Miranda Lawson : You ass...

  Commander Shepard : Come on, Miranda. You know you want this.

  Miranda Lawson : I do...

• Kal'Reegar : I can't get a clear shot while it's down like that. I tried to move in closer but one of the bastards punched a shot clean through my suit!

  Commander Shepard : How bad is your suit damage?

  Kal'Reegar : Combat seals clamped down to isolate contamination, and I'm swimming in antibiotics. The geth might get me but I'm not going to die from an infection in the middle of a battle. That's just insulting!

• Commander Shepard : You'd better not stab me in the back, Grunt.

  Grunt : I would never stab you in the back, Shepard. Military like you and me? Straight to the face.

  Grunt : [after a brief pause]  Kidding! Kidding!

• Garrus Vakarian : I remember this one mission, me and this recon scout had been at each other's throats, nerves mostly. She suggested we settle it in the ring.

  Commander Shepard : I take it you went easy on her?

  Garrus Vakarian : Actually, she and I were the two best hand to hand combatants on the ship. I had reach, she had flexibility. It was brutal. After 9 rounds, the judges declared it a draw. A lot of unhappy bettors in the other room. We, uh, ended up having a tiebreaker in her quarters. I had reach, she had flexibility. More than one way to work off stress, I guess...

• Commander Shepard : What's your opinion of this? The drugs, I mean.

  Legion : These substances enhance short-term performance at the expense of long-term platform survivability. It is fundamentally similar to "over-clocking" geth hardware. We do so whenever necessary. However, should our platform be damaged by overclocking, we can be repaired. Why an organic would choose this is puzzling.

• Commander Shepard : You're awfully anxious to get Samara out of your district.

  Detective Anaya : My bosses want me to detain her. They're worried she'll cause some kind of cross-species incident. But her Justicar Code won't let her be taken into custody. If I try it, she'll have to kill me. I have no interest in dying, so if you lure her away with some big noble cause before I have to carry out my orders, I'm thrilled to help you.

  Commander Shepard : Your superiors are sending you to certain death for no good reason. You have a right to disobey.

  Garrus Vakarian : We can disobey suicidal orders? Why wasn't I told?

  Tali'Zorah : That's about twice a day.

• Jack : I'm not going anywhere with you! You're Cerberus!

  Commander Shepard : Why does it matter if I'm with Cerberus?

  Jack : They've been on my ass for years. Anytime I get free, they put a huge bounty on me. That's why Warden Kuril figured he'd struck gold when he caught me.

  Miranda Lawson : She's destroyed Cerberus property and killed Cerberus people, hence the bounty.

  Jack : [to Miranda]  You die first.

• Commander Shepard : Take a good long look at me. Do I look like a looter?

  District Guard : Uh, no.

  Commander Shepard : That's right. Now, I'm going in. If I find looters, I'll kill them. Anybody gets in my way, I'll kill them, too.

  District Guard : [Worried]  I'll call the guards. They'll let you in with no trouble.

  Refugee : Wait, you're stopping me but not them? You son of a bitch!

  District Guard : You don't have a grenade launcher, lady. Get lost.

• Commander Shepard : How are you holding up?

  Grunt : You're soft, Shepard. My fingers's length in your back and i can sever your spine. You're just like the Salarians and Asari, all soft. Turians and Quarians, they're tougher. It takes more to get through a Turian, but there really isn't much point.

  Grunt : [Chuckles, and with quotation finger gestures]  "Much point." Ah, never mind.

• Commander Shepard : I'll dance next to you, if you want to think we're dancing together go ahead.

• Commander Shepard : You forgot your credit chit at Saronis Applications. The Clerk is holding it for you.

  Kor Tun : Oh. Well. The quarian could have stolen it.

  Officer Tammert : [to Lia'Vael]  I'll close this event report. But I'll be watching you. Get a permanent residence, or I'll run you in for vagrancy.

  [turns to leave] 

  Commander Shepard : Are you to serious?

  Kor Tun : What?

  Commander Shepard : [to Kor Tun]  You falsely accuse this girl from stealing from you. All you have to say now is that she "could have" stolen it?

  [shoves Kor Tun] 

  Kor Tun : Now just a min...

  Commander Shepard : [grabs Officer Tammert's shirt]  And you. She gets harassed and insulted by this guy, and you throw in a threat to arrest her for vagrancy?

  Officer Tammert : How about I run you in for obstruction of justice?

  Commander Shepard : [releases Tammert]  You think you're going to "run in" a Spectre? I think both of you should get out of here.

  Officer Tammert : Son of a...

  [he and Kor Tun leave] 

• Commander Shepard : My name is Shepard, and I'm here to get you off this ship.

  Jack : I'm not going anywhere with you. You're Cerberus.

  Commander Shepard : I'm offering to be your friend. You don't want to be my enemy.

  Legion : There is a high statistical probability of death by gunshot. A punch to the face is also likely.

  Jack : You show up in a Cerberus frigate to take me away somewhere? You think I'm stupid?

  Commander Shepard : This ship is going down in flames. I've got the *only* way out. I'm offering to take you with me, and you're arguing!

  Legion : Reccommend Subject-Jack be disabled and transported aboard as cargo.

• Commander Shepard : You're awfully anxious to get Samara out of your district.

  Detective Anaya : My bosses want me to detain her. They're worried she'll cause some kind of cross-species incident. But her Justicar Code won't let her be taken into custody. If I try it, she'll have to kill me. I have no interest in dying, so if you lure her away with some big noble cause before I have to carry out my orders, I'm thrilled to help you.

  Commander Shepard : Your superiors are sending you to certain death for no good reason. You have a right to disobey.

  Jack : Let's remember that the next time Shepard sends into impossible odds. That's about twice a day.

• Commander Shepard : You know, for a bunch of cheap touristy crap, your prices are pretty high.

  Deleia Sanassi : I am sorry you feel that way. There are many stores on the Citadel. Perhaps another would be more in your price range.

  Commander Shepard : So you're saying I'm *poor*? Just because I'm not as well off as you doesn't mean you can hold yourself above me.

  Deleia Sanassi : What? No, I...

  [Shepard walks outside of the store] 

  Commander Shepard : [shouts]  Hey! Everyone! This store discriminates against the poor!

  Deleia Sanassi : Please, calm down! As an apology, I'll let you have my station employee discount. Is that acceptable?

  Commander Shepard : Well, all right. But you still hurt my feelings.

• Commander Shepard : Have you got a minute to talk?

  Prof. Mordin Solus : Actually, wanted to talk. Medical Matters. Aware that mission is dangerous. Different species react differently to stress. Aware that you and Jack are sexually active. Or planning to be. Suggest caution. Emotionally unstable biotics dangerous during intercourse.

  Commander Shepard : I'm aware that Jack is dangerous, but I want to see where this goes.

  Prof. Mordin Solus : Of course. Hormones. Will be here to set broken bones later.

• Commander Shepard : Will you just stop for a second? We'll be jumping several light years. There's time to talk.

  Dr. Liara T'Soni : About what?

  Commander Shepard : About us.

  Dr. Liara T'Soni : Shepard, listen. I'm... glad you're here.

  Commander Shepard : You worried there might be terminals you need me to hack?

  Dr. Liara T'Soni : That's not fair! You were dead!

  Commander Shepard : I came back!

  Dr. Liara T'Soni : Yes, you came back! And now *you'd* rather pass time with "Ms. Lawson" and her low cut jumpsuit!

• [Dr. Chakwas shares a bottle of Serrice Ice Brandy with Commander Shepard and they both get drunk] 

  Doctor Chakwas : [laughing]  I thought Alenko's biotic display might've broken Jenkins' back, but Jenkins pops up and yells, "THAT WAS AWESOME!" Ah, Jenkins. Soldiers like him make the Alliance great! Cerberus lacks the same... enthusiasm.

  Commander Shepard : With your service record, you could've gotten a tour of duty on any Alliance ship. Why'd you really leave?

  Doctor Chakwas : Maybe it's less about leaving and more about staying. As a military doctor, I mostly treat people who are in bad shape. Often they die. And if I *can* help them, they move on. Either way, they leave.

  Commander Shepard : Don't you have any friends or family?

  Doctor Chakwas : No. Not lacking friendship, just stability. Jeff... Joker will always have Vrolik Syndrome. He would never admit it, but he needs my help. And he always will. I wish it weren't, but sadly, it's true.

  Commander Shepard : Treating Joker gives you a kind of stability.

  Doctor Chakwas : So does this ship, even if it's a copy. Or, hell, maybe it's you. Shepard, our immovable center. A place for a person to stop and catch her breath. Or maybe I'm just happily drunk. Would it hurt if it was simple like that for once?

  Commander Shepard : Here's to simply being happily drunk.

  Doctor Chakwas : I'll drink to that.

• Commander Shepard : You're awfully anxious to get Samara out of your district.

  Detective Anaya : My bosses want me to detain her. They're worried she'll cause some kind of cross-species incident. But her Justicar Code won't let her be taken into custody. If I try it, she'll have to kill me. I have no interest in dying, so if you lure her away with some big noble cause before I have to carry out my orders, I'm thrilled to help you.

  Commander Shepard : Your superiors are sending you to certain death for no good reason. You have a right to disobey.

  Zaeed : Then maybe we should talk about hazard pay next time Shepard walks us into certain death. That's about twice a day, best I can figure.

• Commander Shepard : I assume everything is going well up here?

  Flight Lieutenant Jeff 'Joker' Moreau : We're just having an argument over personalization of my workspace.

  EDI : Cerberus regulations are clear, Mr. Moreau. "Personalization" does not include grease on my bridge cameras.

• Jacob Taylor : Commander. We've done what we could for Garrus, but he took a bad hit. The docs corrected with surgical procedures and some cybernetics. Best we can tell, he'll have full functionality, but...

  [Garrus walks in] 

  Garrus Vakarian : Shepard.

  Jacob Taylor : Tough son of a bitch. Didn't think he'd be up yet.

  Garrus Vakarian : Nobody would give me a mirror. How bad is it?

  Commander Shepard : Hell, Garrus, you were always ugly. Slap some face-paint on there, and no one will even notice.

  Garrus Vakarian : Ha-ah! Don't make me laugh, damn it. My face is barely holding together as it is. Ah, probably for the best. Everyone was always ignoring you and hitting on me. Time for you to get a fair shot at it.

• Thane Krios : Kolyat.

  Kolyat Krios : This... this is a joke. Now? *Now* you show up?

  Joram Talid : Help me, drell. I'll do whatever you want.

  Captain Bailey : C-Sec. Put the gun down, son.

  Kolyat Krios : Get out of my way. I'm walking out. He's coming with me.

  Thane Krios : They'll have snipers outside.

  Kolyat Krios : I don't need your help! All of you, back off! I'll kill him!

  Commander Shepard : [Renegade option]  No, you won't.

  [shoots Talid dead] 

  Kolyat Krios : Oh my gods...

  Commander Shepard : Hostages only work when your enemy cares if they live.

  Thane Krios : Interesting solution.

  Commander Shepard : He was a racist and a criminal. Isn't that enough?

  Thane Krios : To some, I suppose.

  Kolyat Krios : I read your files. Isn't that what you do? Kill people who do bad things?

  Captain Bailey : [to C-Sec officer]  Take the boy into custody.

  Kolyat Krios : You son of a bitch!

  Commander Shepard : Your father and I have killed a lot of people. You haven't. There's no reason you should start.

  Kolyat Krios : I read his files. What made it okay for *him* to kill all those years?

  Thane Krios : I was six when the hanar began to train me. I didn't know any better. Your mother woke me from my battle sleep.

  Kolyat Krios : Then why did you leave her? Why weren't you there when she died?

  Thane Krios : Your mother - they killed her to get to me. It was my fault.

  Kolyat Krios : What?

  Thane Krios : After her body was given to the deep, I went to find them. The trigger men. The ringleaders. I hurt them. Eventually killed them. When I went back to see you you were... older. I should have stayed with you.

  Kolyat Krios : I guess it's too bad for me you waited so long, huh?

  Thane Krios : Kolyat, I've taken many bad things out of the world. You're the only good thing I ever added to it.

• Miranda Lawson : [Shepard and Miranda run into each other]  Oh! Pardon me, Commander...

  [Puts her hand on his chest and whispers in his ear] 

  Miranda Lawson : I've cleared the engine room. I'll be there in 5 minutes.

  Commander Shepard : I should've known you wouldn't settle for the captain's quarters.

  Miranda Lawson : I settle for nothing but the best.

  [Walks into the elevator and gives Shepard a wink as the door closes] 

• Urdnot Shaman : This is the tank-bred? Is it very life like.

  [sniffs] 

  Urdnot Shaman : Smells correct as well. Your protests ring hollow, Uvenk.

  Commander Shepard : I don't care what this idiot says. Grunt has a right to be here!

  Urdnot Shaman : There's some fire - and from an alien! Oh, the shame this heaps on those who whine like pups.

  Gatatog Uvenk : If this must stand on ritual, then I invoke a denial! My krantt stands against him! He has no one.

  Urdnot Shaman : Hmm... my patience is tested, but Uvenk invokes correctly. Grunt, who is your krantt? Your allies willing to kill and die on your behalf?

  Commander Shepard : Grunt will strengthen Clan Urdnot. Name our target, and it will die.

  Urdnot Shaman : Spoken well! Most aliens - and some krogan - do not understand our ways. I believe this human does.

  Gatatog Uvenk : Aliens don't know strength! My followers are true krogan! Everything about Grunt is a lie!

  Commander Shepard : [Renegade Interrupt: Shepard headbutts Uvenk] 

  Gatatog Uvenk : [tensely]  You... you dare?

  Urdnot Shaman : [laughs]  I like this human! He understands!

  Gatatog Uvenk : I withdraw my denial. This will be decided elsewhere!

  [shoves Shepard as he walks away] 

• Sick Krogran : I can do it! I'm up! And I'm going to the female camp!

  Commander Shepard : Damn right you are. Get back there and show them what you're worth! Go, go!

  Sick Krogran : RAAAHHHHHHH!

• Commander Shepard : Have a minute to talk?

  Prof. Mordin Solus : Not now, I think I just developed a cure for Joker's illness! No, wait, causes liver failure, never mind...

• Commander Shepard : Are you part of Pitne For's trade group?

  Niftu Cal : When I was mortal, I worked for Pitne. The poor soul is probably terrified that I have not returned.

  Legion : Pitne For has not reported your absence. His goal was departure. Pitne For places greater value on material goods than companions.

  Niftu Cal : I shall toss Wasea about like a rag doll!

  Legion : His operating system is unstable. He will fail.

• Commander Shepard : I assume everything is going well up here?

  Flight Lieutenant Jeff 'Joker' Moreau : You know, this is really nice. EDI took up the slack in almost every department. I could get used to this kind of help.

  EDI : It is not my intention to assume all of your responsibilities, Jeff.

  Flight Lieutenant Jeff 'Joker' Moreau : No, no, no, I'm good. Just keep me updated. Quietly.

  Commander Shepard : EDI isn't a crutch. I want your eyes on everything.

  Flight Lieutenant Jeff 'Joker' Moreau : Eyes are easy, Commander. I've got eyes covered.

  EDI : I believe covering your eyes would be counter to Shepard's intention.

• Niftu Cal : [after being pushed over by Shepard]  But... great wind! Biotic god! I'm... I... what was I saying? I'm... tired. You... may be right. Yes, I'm tired... I'll nap. Destroy the universe later...