The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)

The Boyfriend Complexity (2010)

Jim Parsons: Sheldon Cooper

Photos 

Quotes 

• Leonard Hofstadter : You'll never guess what just happened.

  Sheldon Cooper : You went out in the hallway, stumbled into an interdimensional portal, which brought you 5,000 years into the future, where you took advantage of the advanced technology to build a time machine, and now you're back, to bring us all with you to the year 7010, where we are transported to work in the Thinkatorium, by telepathically-controlled flying dolphins?

  Leonard Hofstadter : No.

  Sheldon Cooper : Awww...

  Leonard Hofstadter : Penny kissed me.

  Sheldon Cooper : Well, who would ever guess that?

• Leonard Hofstadter : Why do I bother talking to you people?

  Sheldon Cooper : If it'll make you feel better, we rarely listen.

• Sheldon Cooper : I'd like to go over some proposed changes to the roommate agreement, specifically to address Penny's annoying personal habits.

  Penny : Oh, my God! What personal habits?

  Sheldon Cooper : I have a list. FYI, overuse of the phrase "Oh my God" is number twelve.

• Sheldon Cooper : Just so you know, I was up all night, but I have finally completed the Penny-specific section of the new roommate agreement.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Yeah, well, not necessary. We broke up again,

  Sheldon Cooper : [Sheldon throws the agreement up in the air]  Do you even think about other people, Leonard? Do you?

• [first lines] 

  Raj Koothrappali : You know who's got to be the bravest person in the Marvel universe? Whoever has to give She-Hulk her bikini wax.

  Howard Wolowitz : Want to talk brave? How about Captain America's undocumented Mexican gardener?

  Leonard Hofstadter : He's not braver than whoever uses the bathroom after the Thing.

  Sheldon Cooper : As usual you're all wrong; the bravest person in the Marvel universe is the doctor who gives Wolverine his prostate exam.

  Howard Wolowitz : How about the guy who gets a prostate exam from Wolverine?

  Sheldon Cooper : Now you're just being silly. Wolverine never displayed the slightest interest in helping others prevent prostate cancer.

• Sheldon Cooper : I don't care for novelty editions of Monopoly. I prefer the classics: regular and Klingon.

• Sheldon Cooper : [answering the phone]  Hello.

  Sheldon Cooper : Yes, the elevator's out of order; you'll have to use the stairs.

  Sheldon Cooper : Of course you can. Pizza dates back to the sixteenth century while the first elevator was not installed until 1852; that means that for over three hundred years people carried pizzas up stairs. Be part of that proud tradition.

  Leonard Hofstadter : I'll go get Penny while that guy spits on our food.

• Leonard Hofstadter : Penny kissing me is not insane. She used to kiss me all the time.

  Sheldon Cooper : Einstein defined insanity as doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. By that standard, Penny is cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs.

• Penny : Sheldon, you don't have to do this, because Leonard and I are not...

  Leonard Hofstadter : Bu-bu-bu-bu, are you sure you want to include him in this?

  Sheldon Cooper : Include me in what? Is there a plot afoot? I'll have no truck with plots.

  Penny : [to Leonard]  No, you're right.

  [to Sheldon] 

  Penny : No, there's, there's no plot, no trucks, no... feet.

• Sheldon Cooper : I'm going to propose a hypothesis. Last night, Raj accidentally made contact with an alien civilization and has been ordered by the United States Government to keep it a secret.

  Raj Koothrappali : Noting happened. Can we please just change the subject?

  Sheldon Cooper : That sounds rehearsed. We are not alone.

• Sheldon Cooper : Leonard is the signatory to the roommate agreement. As such, he bears responsibility for all your infractions and must pay all fines.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Fines?

  Sheldon Cooper : Yes. Penny's going to be spending nights here again, you'll need to set up an escrow account. Sign here.