Community (TV Series)

Pascal's Triangle Revisited (2010)

Gillian Jacobs: Britta Perry

Photos 

Quotes 

• Professor Michelle Slater : Yo, Goldilocks. Drop the smirk. I know about your grungy tumble, and I'm sure it was the highlight of your diary, but it was during a pit stop in something real.

  Britta Perry : You were the pit stop. He used you to numb the pain of not getting with me. Jeff needs a girl who doesn't just not wear underwear because Oprah told her it would spice things up. He needs a girl who doesn't wear underwear because she hasn't done laundry in three weeks. He's been to flavor country now. They should retire the table we did it on.

  Shirley Bennett : [spit-take as she passes by]  Table?

  Dean Pelton : Miss Britta Perry!

  [applause] 

  Britta Perry : Oh, I'm sorry. I have to go. I just won a contest for being hot.

  [on-stage, grabs mic and gasps] 

  Britta Perry : Oh, wow. This is a huge honor. This may come as a surprise to you, but I've never actually won anything before.

  Dean Pelton : Okay, well, you still haven't. I'm just listing the nominees, so not a great time to get cocky. Okay. Christine Hollinsworth!

  [Light applause] 

  Dean Pelton : [Michelle approaches Jeff]  Britney Baker!

  [Cheers and applause] 

  Dean Pelton : [Britta exits stage embarrassed and bewildered]  Miss Danielle Harmond!

  [Applause] 

  Dean Pelton : [Michelle kisses Jeff]  Amy Sm...

  Britta Perry : [returns on-stage and grabs mic]  Jeff Winger, do not get back with Slater. I love you.

  [gasps from the audience] 

  Señor Chang : Psst, psst, Britta. Britta! Your lipstick looks better.

• Jeff Winger : More importantly, our very own Britta Perry, it turns out, has been nominated for transfer queen.

  Shirley Bennett : Oh, that's nice!

  Britta Perry : What the hell is a transfer queen?

  Annie Edison : Like prom queen. You wear a sash, and there's a vote. If you win they put a crown on your head. And I am so jealous that I wanna murder you. Aren't you excited?

  Britta Perry : No. How did I get nominated?

  Shirley Bennett : Don't let it upset you, Britta. It's the last day of the semester. Nothing can ruin that.

  Dean Pelton : [popping up in the room]  HI!

  Jeff Winger : Amazing. He's like an evil genie.

• Professor Ian Duncan : You know, you don't actually have to lie on a sofa like it's a Woody Allen movie.

  Britta Perry : Thank you for telling me that in the last session, dumbass.

  Professor Ian Duncan : Now, look... there are bugs on the windshield of your mind you may never be able to squeegee, like a certain birthday party attended by a rather enterprising transient in a dinosaur costume. But there are other more recent streaks that you might yet be able to wipe clear, like your adolescent fear of being a so-called blow-up doll. I really think this nomination may actually help that.

  Britta Perry : So you think id feel better about myself if I got all sexed up, went over there, and really tried to be crowned queen of the dingbats?

  Professor Ian Duncan : Precisely.

  Britta Perry : Wow. Guess you really get what you pay for with free therapy.

  [rises from couch] 

  Professor Ian Duncan : Ouch. That stung a little bit. Thanks.

  Britta Perry : [opens door to leave]  Oh.

  Señor Chang : [disgustedly]  Oh.

  Britta Perry : I'll save you some time. He listens to you talk for a year, then recommends a makeover.

  Señor Chang : Well, don't wear as much lipstick as you did on Valentine's Day. Your mouth looked like a coin purse.

• Britta Perry : [to Shirley]  Oh, get over it. I've seen you shake the Dean's hand. Who knows where he's been?