Anuvahood (2011)

Richie Campbell: Tyrone

Photos 

Quotes 

• Tunde : [singing]  #I say can't you see the sign its a double yellow line!#

  Tyrone : OH MY DAYS what the f**k you doing to my baby?

  Tunde : I am just an African.

  Tyrone : And how you scratch man's tings blud?

  Tunde : This is disabled parking, you are not disabled!

  Tyrone : I am disabled.

  Tunde : You are not disabled.

  Tyrone : Blud, I am disabled, look at my arm

  [wiggles arm around] 

  Tunde : Ehhh so you are mocking disfortunate people! You know God is watching you, God is watching you!

  Tyrone : I don't care who's watchin', Blud! LET them Watch! YOU'RE TAKING MAN'S STRESS LEVELS TO A NEXT DIMENSION!

• Tyrone : [Sniffing]  I smell something. Mm, I know that smell, blud. If man's calculations is correct, that's the smell of *piff*, blud!

  Kenneth : Yeah, I had a little zoot earlier.

  Tyrone : Don't take man for a mongoose, blud! Can't disrespect man's intelligence out here, rudeboy. Man's nose *knows* what it's smelling, innit?

  [sniffs] 

  Tyrone : You shotting piff, blud?

  Kenneth : Nah, blud.

  Tyrone : Oh, my days! Why you calling me blud for, blud? Do me and you look the same? I don't think so! You look like one kind of Indian blud to me.

  Kenneth : I ain't even Indian, man

  Tyrone : [looks at the others]  So, where's this weed, then, blud?

  Kenneth : We ain't got no weed, man.

  Tyrone : I smell porky pies, blud. Yep. Don't chat shit to me, blud. Couple man just told me you licked them a tens, innit? I know these tings, blud. Ha-ha-ha! Look, man, man just wants to cop a little ting off you. You get me, fam?

  Kenneth : You got your own food, though.

  Tyrone : There's a drought, fam! Man can't get nothing still!

  [Tyrone puts Kenneth in headlock] 

  Tyrone : - All right, all right, all right. Cool, man.

  Kenneth : Aah!

  Tyrone : Come on, blud. Man's bless out here, fam. I just wanna get a little high tonight, man.

  Kenneth : All right, all right, all right!

  [Tyrone releases him] 

  Tyrone : K, man... Read more:

  Kenneth : I gotta.

  Tyrone : Give me a fat juicy score ting, blud.

  Kenneth : Which one did you want, blud?

  Tyrone : Hmm.

  [sniffs weed, licks lips] 

  Tyrone : Actually... all of it.

  [snatches the entire bag of weed and runs down the steps laughing] 

  Kenneth : Come on, man!

  Tyrone : Oh, my God! Man's so unpredictable out here! Man said he wasn't gonna rob them, but man just turned around and robbed him, Standard Procedures! Man took down the sign!

  [runs back up steps, sniffs the bag] 

  Tyrone : there's a *lot* of weed in there, innit, though, blud? So, what, are you some kind of shotter now, blud? Think you're a badman now?

  Kenneth : Nah, man, I just.

  Tyrone : amn right you're not a badboy, blud! Shit! Now, true say, man didn't even want to rob you, man, today. It's like you was asking for it! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Shit. - Man's gonna get so high tonight, blud.

  Lesoi : Blud, I beg you allow it, man.

  Tyrone : OH MY DAYS! Is Mr Miyagi trying to make communication? with me, blud? Like man knows me? Man's gonna have to get jacked for that, blud. Jackanory time! Next Hype!

  Lesoi : Allow it, man.

  [Tyrone frisks him and steals his PSP] 

  Tyrone : Ha! Bo! That's my little sister's Christmas present sorted still!

  T.J. : Listen, I'd love to stay and jam, yeah, but I gotta do my mum's braids, OK?

  Tyrone : Nah, blud. You need to be taking them creps off right about now, rudeboy.

  T.J. : What, again?

  Tyrone : Take the creps *off*, blud.

  T.J. : But they don't even fit you!

  Tyrone : Little perseverance, man can squeeze into them still.

  [Tunde Whimpers] 

  Tyrone : You're not gonna cry, are you, blud?

  T.J. : [blatanly lying]  No!

  Tyrone : Tell your mum safe for the creps!

  T.J. : Oh, this is emotional, man!

  [Sobbing] 

  T.J. : I'm telling my mum, man!

  [runs away] 

• Tyrone : [Sees Enrique]  Who the fuck is this?

  Enrique : My name is Enrique Est...

  Tyrone : What have you got for Tyrone, blud?

  Lesoi : Blud, allow him, man.

  Tyrone : Did anyone ask for a chow mein chicken in black bean sauce, sweet and sour pork balsl? No. No! So, why is Mr. Egg Fried Rice getting involved in the situation for? ! Shit!

  [to Enrique] 

  Tyrone : What's that, blud? Is that your phone?

  Enrique : It's my journal.

  Tyrone : Take it *out*.

  [snatches it] 

  Tyrone : Ha-ha-ha! Man's got a journal, blud! Ha-ha-ha!

  Bookie : Allow robbin' man's journal, man!

  Tyrone : [whack Bookie with journal]  Shut up, blud. Yeah, blud! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! This is now property of Tyrone. A man takes what he wants out here, blud. Standard procedures. Bookie Ebegulu! pass me your phone!

  Bookie : Nah, Blud!

  Tyrone : What? Are you saying no to me, blud? Hm? Is that what you're saying, blud? See this, blud? What does that say, blud? Hm? It says property of Tyrone. Look at it, made in Tyrone. I swear, blud, you're lucky your auntie knows my mum or man would've stripped them jeans off you right about now, fam. No homo. Let man know if you want some weed, innit? Man's got the piff, blud! Ha-ha-ha! Man's tremendous out here, blud! Standard procedures! Man's intelligence has no limits, blud!