- [Melanie is stressed out over having said "I love you" to Pete]
- Joy Scroggs: Oh, I wouldn't worry about it too much. I've blurted it out when I didn't mean it, too. Someone recently mistook me for Kate Beckinsale, and I told him I loved him.
- Elka Ostrovsky: Couldn't you have just given him a biscuit for his guide dog?
- Melanie Moretti: What *is* all this stuff? I feel like I'm in 'The Goonies'.
- Victoria Chase: Wow! Is this stuff real?
- Joy Scroggs: Is that a tiara? Who *are* you?
- Elka Ostrovsky: I'm Anastasia, the last surviving member of the Romanov dynasty.
- Melanie Moretti: You are?
- Elka Ostrovsky: No, but I've always wanted to say that.
- Victoria Chase: Is all of this yours?
- Elka Ostrovsky: No, it's stolen.
- Joy Scroggs: Oh my!
- Melanie Moretti: What?
- Elka Ostrovsky: [picks up a knife] And now I'm going to have to *kill* you!
- [grins]
- Elka Ostrovsky: I've always wanted to say that, too.
- [last lines]
- Pete: What the hell is all this stuff?
- Melanie Moretti: Wait, wha', you were going to say something.
- Elka Ostrovsky: You had to date a cop, didn't you?
- [first lines]
- Melanie Moretti: Elka! Elka!
- Joy Scroggs: Let us in!
- Melanie Moretti: Elka, please, the tornado's
- [drowned out by thunderclap]
- Melanie Moretti: . We're all going to die.
- Victoria Chase: [on phone] Cherchez ma robe maintenant, ou des têtes tomberont.
- Joy Scroggs: Bloody French.
- Melanie Moretti: You don't even know who she's talking to.
- Joy Scroggs: Don't need to.
- Victoria Chase: Now that 'Edge of Tomorrow' is cancelled, this'll be my very last chance to show that Susan Lucci who the real queen of daytime is.
- Joy Scroggs: Judge Judy?
- Victoria Chase: You know, darling, instead of making fun, perhaps you should go and find the bottom half of your skirt.
- Melanie Moretti: [as Joy leaves for her 'booty call'] Oh my God, look at that wind! Her clothes are going to fly right off!
- Joy Scroggs: That's the plan!
- Victoria Chase: When a beloved artist inhabits an unforgettable role like Honor St. Raven for the past twenty-seven years and cannot get to the Daytime Emmy Awards to receive her public lauding from her peers, after being overlooked for such a long time... well, then the terrorists have won.
- Victoria Chase: We've been through, what, everything together. OK, between us: six divorces,
- Joy Scroggs: Five of them yours. And an endless array of bad boyfriends - all of them mine.
- Melanie Moretti: Five kids.
- Joy Scroggs: Two grandkids.
- Victoria Chase: Nieces, please!
- Melanie Moretti: We've just always had each others' backs,
- Victoria Chase: Mm-hm.
- Melanie Moretti: for better and for worse.