House M.D. (TV Series)

Unplanned Parenthood (2010)

Peter Jacobson: Dr. Chris Taub

Quotes 

• Dr. Gregory House : [In a soothing voice]  Are there any masses causing an obstruction?

  Dr. Chris Taub : No. Are you okay?

  Dr. Gregory House : [Still in soothing voice]  Just talking in a soothing voice. Not for your benefit. Why is it turning you on?

• Dr. Chris Taub : So what was that shrug? A "Dr. Cheng could work" shrug or a "House is gonna crush you for even considering her" shrug?

  [Chase shrugs] 

  Dr. Chris Taub : You suck.

  Dr. Robert Chase : House is gonna hate anyone we hire, because he doesn't want to hire anyone.

• Dr. Gregory House : Whoa, whoa, whoa. What? I know about the Jew, the Black and the Croc Hunter, but when did we get our Asian persuasion on?

  Dr. Chris Taub : Dr. Cheng is the NICU attending on the case and she's not here.

  Dr. Gregory House : Well, then I just wasted a perfectly good racial epithet.

• Abbey : What are the risks to putting my baby on chemo?

  Dr. Chris Taub : It could damage her brain or affect her development. But these risks are small compared to the risks you would be taking by leaving your cancers untreated.

  Abbey : [Long pause]  I want to wait.

• Dr. Eric Foreman : House, there's someone here I need you to meet. I just hired Dr. Christine Fraser. She's a board-certified...

  Dr. Gregory House : [via phone]  Nice to meet you. You're fired.

  Dr. Fraser : What?

  Dr. Eric Foreman : House, you're kidding, right? I've done my due diligence. She's the best there is.

  Dr. Fraser : What did I do?

  Dr. Gregory House : You had the misfortune to be the lesson that Foreman is learning. That whooshing sound is the air being let out of his ego.

  [Fraser leaves the room] 

  Dr. Eric Foreman : You are such an ass, House. You could've made the same point without crushing the hopes of a young doctor who was actually excited to have this job.

  Dr. Gregory House : I'm not sure I could have. You keep giving me far too much credit. Taub, it's your turn to find a young doctor who's actually excited to have this job.

  Dr. Chris Taub : For you to fire?

  Dr. Gregory House : Not until you, or she, earns it.

• Dr. Chris Taub : Pretty amazing case. Thanks for your help.

  Dr. Cheng : I was glad for the chance to work it with you.

  Dr. Chris Taub : I've thought about it, and I'd like to formally offer you the job.

  Dr. Cheng : It's funny. I wanted to work on House's team until I started working with his team.

  Dr. Chris Taub : Yeah, I know. Chase and Foreman can get a little...

  Dr. Cheng : Actually, it's you. I get that House is an ass, but at least he owns it.

  Dr. Chris Taub : You don't understand. This whole thing was just a game to House. I didn't have a choice, but...

  Dr. Cheng : You're a grown man, Dr. Taub. You can make whatever choices you want. And instead of hiring me when he said you could, you chose to act like a paranoid, scared little kid. I hate kids... Goodbye, Dr. Taub.