"The Almighty Johnsons" It's a Kind of a Birthday Present (TV Episode 2011) - Timothy Balme as Mike Johnson

Axl Johnson : But I am a god, right?

Mike Johnson : Yes, Axl, you are now a God.

Anders Johnson : Any chance you could put your pants on, be a pants-on God?
Mike Johnson : Some gods are also oracles. They know shit. We have Olaf.
Olaf Johnson : Okay, I know this is messing with your head, but my mother and father were gods, so I'm a god. My son was a god. He married your mother, who was a goddess...

Mike Johnson : ...and when the sprog of a god and a goddess turn twenty-one, they too become a god, okay?

Olaf Johnson : And that's what we're doing here today - turning you into a god.
Anders Johnson : [as Axl's about to step into the sacred circle] Oh, take off you clothes.

Axl Johnson : What?

Olaf Johnson : Look, you don't have to.

Anders Johnson : Trust me, take off your clothes.

Ty Johnson : [rolling eyes upward] Gayest god ever.

Anders Johnson : I loved that jacket. It was totally ruined.

Axl Johnson : What happened to the jacket?

Mike Johnson : Just forget about the jacket. You said you'd do as I say and... Yeah, actually in the nuddy's probably best.

Axl Johnson : [smiling] You're gonna film this and play it at the party, right?

Mike Johnson : No, Axl. This... stays between us.
Mike Johnson : You come with me.

Axl Johnson : If I'm Odin, how come you still get to tell me what to do?

Mike Johnson : Because I'm still you big brother.
Mike Johnson : If you die before the quest is complete, we all die, too.

Axl Johnson : Great. No pressure, then.

Timothy Balme: Mike Johnson