Game of Thrones (TV Series)

What Is Dead May Never Die (2012)

Peter Dinklage: Tyrion Lannister

Photos 

Quotes 

• Lord Varys : You will be pleased to know our mutual friend is doing quite well in Lady Sansa's service.

  Tyrion Lannister : Good. One of my better ideas.

  Lord Varys : And it seems the Grand Maester has found his way into a black cell?

  [Tyrion shrugs] 

  Lord Varys : Well played, my lord Hand. But should I be worried? Janos Slynt, Pycelle... the small council grows smaller every day.

  Tyrion Lannister : The council has a reputation for serving past Hands poorly. I don't mean to follow Ned Stark to the grave.

  Lord Varys : Power is a curious thing, my lord. Are you fond of riddles?

  Tyrion Lannister : Why? Am I about to hear one?

  Lord Varys : Three great men sit in a room: a king, a priest, and a rich man. Between them stands a common sellsword. Each great man bids the sellsword kill the other two. Who lives, who dies?

  Tyrion Lannister : Depends on the sellsword.

  Lord Varys : Does it? He has neither crown, nor gold, nor favor with the gods.

  Tyrion Lannister : He has a sword, the power of life and death.

  Lord Varys : But if it's swordsmen who rule, why do we pretend kings hold all the power? When Ned Stark lost his head, who was truly responsible? Joffrey? The executioner? Or something else?

  Tyrion Lannister : I've decided I don't like riddles.

  [pause] 

  Lord Varys : Power resides where men believe it resides. It's a trick. A shadow on the wall. And a very small man can cast a very large shadow.

• Tyrion Lannister : You disappoint me, Grand Maester.

  Grand Maester Pycelle : I am your loyal servant.

  Tyrion Lannister : So loyal that you told the queen about my plans to send Myrcella to Dorne.

  Grand Maester Pycelle : No! Never! It's a falsehood! I swear it! It wasn't me! Ah, Varys. It was Varys, the spideeeerr!

  Tyrion Lannister : See, I told Varys that I was giving the princess to the Greyjoys. I told Littlefinger I planned to wed her to Robyn Arryn. I told no one that I was offering her to the Dornish. No one but you.

  Grand Maester Pycelle : The eunuch has spies everywhere.

  Tyrion Lannister : Cut off his manhood and feed it to the goats.

  Timett : There are no goats, halfman.

  Tyrion Lannister : Well make do!

  Tyrion Lannister : [to Pycelle]  How long have you been spying for my sister?

  Grand Maester Pycelle : All I did, I did for House Lannister! Always! Your Lord father, ask him. I've always been his servant, since the days of the Mad King.

  Tyrion Lannister : [casually to Bronn]  I don't like his beard.

  Grand Maester Pycelle : What? No, no!

  [Bronn cuts off Pycelle's beard with a blade] 

• Tyrion Lannister : Oh, and remember...

  Petyr 'Littlefinger' Baelish : The queen mustn't know.

• [Cersei discovers that Tyrion wants to send Myrcella to the Martells] 

  Cersei Lannister : You monster! Myrcella is my only daughter. Do you really think I will let you sell her like a common whore?

  Tyrion Lannister : Myrcella is a princess. Some would say she was born for this.

  Cersei Lannister : I will not let you ship her of to Dorne as I was shipped off to Robert Baratheon.

  Tyrion Lannister : Dorne is the safest place for her.

  Cersei Lannister : Are you mad? The Martells loathe us.

  Tyrion Lannister : That's why we need to seduce them. We're going to need their support in the war your son started.

  Cersei Lannister : She'll be a hostage.

  Tyrion Lannister : A guest.

  Cersei Lannister : You won't get away with this. You think the piece of paper Father gave you keeps you safe? Ned Stark had a piece of paper, too.

• Tyrion Lannister : [referring to Pycelle]  Find him?

  Bronn : Aye and he's got company.

  Bronn : Filthy old stout. I almost hate to interrupt.

  Tyrion Lannister : No you don't.

  Bronn : You're right, I don't.

• Shae : You won't let me leave this room. You won't let me...

  Tyrion Lannister : Shh. Shh. Keep your voice down.

  Shae : Why? Do you think your father can hear me?

  Shae : [yells]  He's three hundred miles away!

  Tyrion Lannister : [sighs]  I don't intend for you to stay here. I might be able to bring you into the castle kitchens. Again, only temporary.

  Shae : Every man who's tasted my cooking, has told me what a good whore I am.

  Tyrion Lannister : But you wouldn't be a cook. You'd pose as a scullion.

  Shae : A scullion? What is a scullion?

  Tyrion Lannister : Kitchen wench.

  Shae : A kitchen wench?

  Tyrion Lannister : Yes, but...

  Shae : Cleaning pots?

  [Shae places her hands on her hips] 

  Shae : Is that how my lion wants to see me?

  Tyrion Lannister : Your lion wants to see you alive. We've come to a dangerous place. My sister wants to hurt me. She'll look for any weakness she can find. She can't know about you.

  Shae : [towering over Tyrion]  I'm the weakness?

  Tyrion Lannister : It's a compliment, my lady.

  Shae : How is being a weakness a compliment?

  Tyrion Lannister : Language can be a bit tricky here.

  Shae : Oh, I'm too stupid to understand? The stupid foreign girl. I am not a kitchen wench.