The Accountant (2016)
Ben Affleck: Christian Wolff
Photos
Quotes
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Dana Cummings : What is this place?
Christian Wolff : Panamerica Airstream, 34ft 7inches long, 8ft 5 inches wide. Dimensions which are perfectly adequate for one person. Preferable, even.
Dana Cummings : This is where you live?
Christian Wolff : No, I don't live here, this is a storage unit, that would be weird.
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Christian Wolff : [In a note he leaves for her at his poignant departure] Dana, you deserve Wow. - C.
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Lamar Blackburn : Why in God's name did I ever hire you?
Christian Wolff : To leak-proof your books. Dana found a mistake and you wanted to be sure it was safe to go public, and now you want to kill her.
Lamar Blackburn : I'm fond of Dana. But I restore lives, not Dana! Me! Men, women, children, I give them hope, make them whole. Do you even know what that's like?
Christian Wolff : Yes, I do.
[shoots Blackburn in the head. Looks at Braxton]
Christian Wolff : Sorry.
Brax : I missed you.
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Christian Wolff : If I don't do something, Dana will die.
Justine : Risking your life for a girl you've known a week, why?
[no response]
Justine : Heavy sigh... what's the plan?
Christian Wolff : Find the person who wants to kill her.
Justine : And?
Christian Wolff : Shoot them in the head.
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Brax : Did you ever wonder where I was?
Christian Wolff : I knew where you were, I just wanted to keep you safe. Some of my clients are quite dangerous.
Brax : I'm kind of considered quite dangerous myself.
Christian Wolff : Well you've made improvements.
Brax : [Smiles] Shit man, you and me here, what are the odds?
Christian Wolff : Statistically speaking...
Brax : Christ man, it's rhetorical, I mean really
[laughs]
Brax : .
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Christian Wolff : [cocks gun]
[speaks softly]
Christian Wolff : Your name?
Ray King : Ray. Raymond King.
Christian Wolff : Who employs you, Raymond King?
Ray King : I'm a Treasury agent.
Christian Wolff : Are you a good one?
Ray King : [pauses] No. No, not particularly.
Christian Wolff : Is that it?
Ray King : K- Kids. I'm a dad. I've got two kids.
Christian Wolff : Grown?
Ray King : Yeah. Yes, yes, they're all- they're all- grown up.
Christian Wolff : Were you a good dad, Raymond King?
Ray King : [trembling] Yeah. I've been a good dad. I'm a lousy agent, and I've been a weak man. But that, I didn't screw up. That I got right.
[starts weeping]
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Christian Wolff : Why was the dress so important to you?
Dana Cummings : It wasn't about the dress. I just wanted to walk into the gym and have everybody say WOW! I was trying to belong. I was trying to connect. I think that no matter how different we are, we're all trying to do the same thing.
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[repeated line]
Christian Wolff : I need to finish.
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Christian Wolff : My father was an officer in the army. Psychological operations. He was concerned that I might be taken advantage of somehow, so he arranged for me to train with a number of specialists throughout my childhood. We lived in 34 homes in 17 years.
Dana Cummings : You moved 34 times?
Christian Wolff : Mm-hm.
Dana Cummings : God, that's extraordinary. I'm sure it must have been difficult. I haven't been anywhere. Well, Cancun - not my proudest moment.
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Rita Blackburn : And...
Christian Wolff : [mentally calculating] 61 million, 679 thousand, and some change.
Rita Blackburn : Who did it, best guess.
Christian Wolff : I don't guess.
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Ed Chilton : Now, Mr. Wolff, I half suspect we're wasting your time.
Christian Wolff : I'm quite sure you're not.
Ed Chilton : And you know this how?
Christian Wolff : I'm on the clock.
Ed Chilton : [Small laugh] Well, I hope we're not wasting ours, then. Look, kidding aside, I think if you saw our books you'd run for the hills. We have an incredibly complicated accounting system. Depreciation schedules on hundreds of different items. Full-time and contract employees. Department of Defense classified accounts. It's a numerical shitstorm.
Christian Wolff : I'll need to see all those books for the past ten years. Bank statements, complete list of clients and vendors. Hard copies printed out, my eyes only. All the information's right here.
[Slides over folded paper]
Ed Chilton : Okay, well, well, look. This all came to my attention only last week. Now, a junior cost accountant stuck her nose where it didn't belong and obviously had no idea what she was looking at. Lamar is overreacting. There's no missing money.
Christian Wolff : How long have you been CFO of this company, sir?
Ed Chilton : Fifteen years.
Christian Wolff : I need the books for the past fifteen, please.
Ed Chilton : Well, you're awful goddamn blunt!
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Christian Wolff : Solomon Grundy, Born on a Monday, Christened on Tuesday, Married on Wednesday, Took ill on Thursday, Grew worse on Friday, Died on Saturday, Buried on Sunday. That was the end, Of Solomon Grundy.
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Christian Wolff : [In response to the farmer's wife, saying she collected the raw materials for her home-made jewellery in, "the truck"] The *company* truck.
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Christian Wolff : [Dana is coming on strong to Chris on the couch, when he suddenly has a thought] Crazy Eddie and the Panama Pump!
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Dana Cummings : My dad was an accountant. He actually... You know, he had the whole schtick. He... You know, the little amortization book, with the green eye-shade. The, like dorky pocket protector and...
Christian Wolff : [Opening his jacket to show his shirt pocket] I've got a pocket protector.
Dana Cummings : That's a nice one. I mean, his was dorky, I guess. Yours is nice.
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Christian Wolff : Pulls to the left. You might consider using a round with a superior ballistic coefficient.
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Christian Wolff : Kill Christian Wolff. Transfer all domestic accounts overseas.
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Christian Wolff : [Spoken very calmly, after an intense scene] We should go.
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Dana Cummings : What do you have to hit to dent a steel thermos?
Christian Wolff : It's just old.
Dana Cummings : How did you get into financial consulting?
Christian Wolff : Department of Labor statistics indicate it's one of the fastest-growing professions. Actuarial sciences are experiencing tremendous growth as well.
Dana Cummings : Okay. I like the balance of it. You know, I like finding things that aren't obvious. Plus, my dad was an accountant. He actually, you know, he had the whole shtick. The, you know, the little amortization book, and the green eyeshade, and the, like, dorky pocket protector and...
Christian Wolff : I have a pocket protector.
[he lifts his jacket to show it to her]
Dana Cummings : That's a nice one. I mean, his was dorky, that's... Yours is nice. But he convinced me to go into the field. Because I wanted to study art at the Art Institute of Chicago, but art doesn't pay the mortgage. "Art doesn't pay the mortgage, young lady." Dad's tastes ran more to Dogs Playing Poker.
Christian Wolff : I like Dogs Playing Poker. Because dogs would never bet on things, and so, it's incongruous. I like incongruity.
Dana Cummings : Yeah, Dogs Playing Poker is nice. It's just sort of a, just different.
[pause]
Dana Cummings : So, I studied accounting at the University of Chicago, where fun goes to die.
Christian Wolff : Why?
Dana Cummings : Why what?
Christian Wolff : Why does fun go to die at the University of Chicago?
Dana Cummings : Oh, no. It's just an expression.
Christian Wolff : I'm joking.
Dana Cummings : Right.
[chuckles, pause]
Dana Cummings : Um, I'll leave you to it.
Christian Wolff : Okay.
Dana Cummings : Let me know if you need anything while you're here.
Christian Wolff : Have a nice day.
Dana Cummings : Yes. You too.
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Dana Cummings : Your life is unique.
Christian Wolff : It's not unique. I have a high-functioning form of autism, which means I have an extremely narrow focus and a hard time abandoning tasks once I've taken them up. I have difficulty socializing with other people, even though I want to.
Dana Cummings : When I was a senior in high school, I wanted this special dress for prom. I told myself that spending $100 on a trashy dress that I was gonna wear one time to an event that I thought was silly in the first place, was...
Christian Wolff : Wasteful.
Dana Cummings : Yes. But Vera Wang made this black, strapless classic. It was more expensive, but you could wear it to all kinds of future events.
Christian Wolff : It was an investment.
Dana Cummings : Yes. Where were you when I was in high school?
Christian Wolff : Oh, North Carolina, Israel.
Dana Cummings : Right. Um... The problem was they wanted $1700 for this dress, and I didn't have that, so...
Christian Wolff : You asked your parents?
Dana Cummings : No. Hang on. Blackjack. I'd never played a hand, but I went to the library, and I checked out all these books on strategy. And I turned the Naperville North math club into a little Vegas.
Christian Wolff : What's a math club?
Dana Cummings : Math club? You compete against other schools. Theory and speed math. Like, what's 298,567 times 92?
Christian Wolff : 27,468,164.
Dana Cummings : [chuckles] Right. Um... Blackjack. I could tell you when to hit, stand, split, re-split. I moved on to card counting, shuffle tracking, hole carding. And I took everything I had, which was $183, and I drove down to Harrah's in Joliet.
Christian Wolff : Why was this dress so important to you?
Dana Cummings : It wasn't about the dress. I just wanted to walk into the gym and have everybody say "Wow!" I was trying to belong. I was trying to connect. I think no matter how different we are, we're all trying to do the same thing.
[pause]
Dana Cummings : But I lost all but $20 in the first 10 minutes. I fed that into a nickel slot on the way out, and I won two grand.
Christian Wolff : Hmm.
Dana Cummings : I used the extra cash to pay for a limo. Only wore the dress the one time.
[pause]
Dana Cummings : Chris, why are we here?
Christian Wolff : Um... I thought this hotel had good water pressure.
Dana Cummings : The Holiday Inn Express in Aurora has good water pressure.
Christian Wolff : Yes, but these towels are very fancy, and cheaper hotels have scratchy towels. And... I wanted you to like it.
