It's Not You, It's Me (2013) Poster

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10/10
Great flick!
Steviechurch3 November 2013
From the very beginning of the movie the main characters and their, somewhat crazy and very realistic personalities, grab your attention and bring you right into the middle of their relationship. Director, Nathan Ives, does an amazing and hilarious job capturing all those little thoughts that go running through men and women's heads. From the good to the bad, it's all there. It is such a relatable movie to anyone that's been through the rough patches of the dating world. Throughout the movie, you'll be laughing and thinking to yourself, "wow, that is so true!" and "I have been there before!". This romantic comedy is an instant classic, that will be loved and enjoyed by many for years to come.
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7/10
Good work from first time director Nathan Ives
cliff31424 October 2013
This smallish movie uses a device that we saw in 1991's Herman's Head. The internal workings of each of the two leads are represented by five characters representing lust and anxiety and the inner child and so on. It is an effective device - and very funny at times - and it is used well in this entertaining comedy which is actually an intelligent romcom.I think most viewers will be able to relate to the inner turmoil, Ross McCall and Joelle Carter are great as the protagonists and all the supporting cast is very good. Maggie Wheeler (you will remember her as the annoying Janice from Friends) plays a sensible counsellor, and in fact everyone is realistic and believable.

Nathan Ives has written a thoughtful and funny script which is not particularly predictable and has a commendable ring of truth to the events (aside from the wacky goings-on inside the heads of McCall and Carter's characters of course) This is a thoroughly enjoyable movie with high budget production values and acting in what I assume is a low to medium budget movie.
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10/10
Hilarious and SO true to life!!
Dawntobin3 November 2013
I loved this movie!! My husband (of 11 years) and I watched this together and we both loved it! Usually he is all about the action movies and I have to twist his arm to watch a rom-com. We really laughed A LOT during this film. It makes you appreciate the crazy crap we go through to find love. We ALL have those voices in put head that make falling in love a bit like a roller coaster ride, and it's fun to see it play out on the big screen. The character development is fun to watch and as the story unfolds you really get a sense for why commitment phobes act like they do, and more importantly how they can grow and change. Such a great film for both sexes... Definitely not just a "chick flick". Take your boyfriend/ husband and laugh together!
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7/10
A Smart, Funny Romance
mmmgrise4 February 2014
I am not typically a romantic comedy person, preferring more the depth of character that I usually find in indie dramas. It was a pleasant surprise when my local Meetup chose this film for our weekly event. I felt like I was sitting with friends, the comedy not overacted. The funny part was the personification of the different thought processes that run through our heads. Boy, could I relate to that! It definitely deviated from the standard, Hollywood Romantic Comedy. There was almost no music, which was a plus because it didn't detract from the acting. The music that was there was enjoyable. The cinematography was simple and pure. A funny, feel good movie.
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10/10
Funny, Well Written-Directed-Acted Movie
jge19685 November 2013
Really good movie, funny and very well written and directed. I laughed quite a bit and the fact that it wasn't the usual Hollywood drivel is a big plus. The actors in the movie were very good and did a wonderful job. I always enjoy seeing the girl from Justified, great actress. The dialogue is very witty and the pacing is spot on. This movie has a strong story and it is not your usual romantic comedy which is all I will say without spoiling anything. My wife really enjoyed this movie and kept going on and on about it. The women that I have talked to that have seen this have also really liked this as well, so it makes a great date flick. Having said that, it is not a movie that is going to make guys cringe. If anything it would be quite the opposite. If you haven't seen this you should.
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7/10
A Rom Com about the struggles men and women face in relationships and how we can overcome these struggles, even with the added conflict within ourselves.
cklyles5 December 2013
It's Not You, It's Me is a brilliant film and, might I add, hilarious! Nathan Ives' talent shines through this amazing independent film. The inner thoughts of the male and female are spot on, from the inner child to the self-doubting person. The conflict we experience in our everyday lives and relationships is shown through this inner conflict, as well as interpersonal, external conflict. It will have you laughing and finding yourself relating it to your own life's experiences. Also, the film is a great reminder of the possibilities we as individuals have to grow and change, and that it's never too late to do this. We can overcome the conflict within ourselves in order to improve relationships on the outside.
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9/10
Interesting perspective
Schneiderranne10 January 2014
I saw this film at the Film Bar in Phoenix last night with a group of indie film lovers. I had absolutely no expectations. What I found was an intriguing take on both sides of a relationship. The "Greek chorus" technique is a good way to display all of the disparate voices we have as we go through the decisions involved with relationships. The gender make-up of the choruses probably mirrored the internal voices we have. Male side had the feminine touch; female side had a masculine perspective (although rather "touchy feelie" for my taste. I appreciate the point of views displayed by the real life ancillary characters (best friends of the love interests). The jolt experienced by the male lead is believable and deftly handled.
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8/10
Rom Com + Herman's Head = Funny
crystalmh369819 January 2014
The lead actors were wonderful but the supporting cast stole the show. Erick Avari as the brainy decision maker in Dave's mind, that doesn't work out to well most of the time, Maggie Wheeler as Dave's therapist, you remember her from friends. Vivica A. Fox and Ary Katz have the best LMFAO scenes in this. During the Q & A Nathan Ives did give a shout out to Herman's Head clearly the inner dialogue of our two lead characters was inspired by this 90's sitcom. This movie is definitely worth seeing especially if you need to laugh about your own f***ed up relationship bulls**t. Lots of great one liners that I would love to tell you about but that would be a spoiler. You will love Carrie's nightmarish re-entry into the dating scene. Go see it.
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8/10
Wonderful!
peacelove-878-14171724 December 2013
This movie was so refreshing and true to real life. Director, Nathan Ives, did an excellent job with this film. All of the cast were wonderful. This movie covers relationships issues that many other movies do not portray accurately. This one hit in on the spot. The dating scene is such a challenge, so it is so nice to have a movie that looks at these challenges in a humorous and also serious way. The voices in the boyfriend's head are great and very true. We all have these voices that try to sway us different ways, and I have never seen a movie that depicts them this well. I give it and A+ and am going to have my boyfriend watch it!
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10/10
Smart, Witty Film That Resonates with Almost Anyone
jenni0729-16 February 2014
The dialog is smart and witty. The acting's spot-on.

Cast did a great job.

The story is engrossing, honest, and very relate-able.

A high-quality film made on a small budget.

Makes you laugh pretty hard.

It pulls at your heartstrings really well, without coming across as cheesy.

Really glad I got to see this little gem.

Nathan Ives showed his considerable talent in this directorial debut.

The writer/director did a great job! Looking forward to seeing more of his work.
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10/10
Great romantic comedy story & creatively told!
kelly-452-47473314 March 2014
After my Netflix binging on series like Dexter and Breaking Bad lately, it's was a refreshing change when I sat down to watch the romantic comedy "It's Not You, It's Me".

Right off the bat, I couldn't help to think "How has no one named a movie this before!?" Of all the cliché phrases that you hear in the dating world, I had thought they must have all been used up! But then, as if the bidding wars had finally ended and the most over-used break-up phrase of all times and this movie was released.

The story follows the tale of a Dave (Ross McCall), a commitment-phobe, and Carrie's (Joelle Carter) relationship and breakup. But, it's not just the story on this movie, it's the way it's told. It doesn't just follow the relationship, it analyses every specific characteristic through the two main character's brain's interior dialog. As the story proceeds from a "day in the life" scene with our characters, it will then shoot to the scene inside their head where different characters representing different aspects of thought. The characters in their heads battle out ideas that eventually decide our main characters next move. At first, I didn't get it. But then again, it started from the guy's point of view, and we all know my understanding of that particular gender. His brain was filled with a child, a man consumed with death and a misogynist, among others. Yep, that seems about right! When it got to Carrie's inner thought process, that's where this movie for me, became a lot of fun. I loved the inner dialog of the characters in her head dealing with the dating world. What was really funny to me, was that they managed to cover every aspect of the female psyche from a character trying to find reason, the diva who just says "Screw it!" all the way down to the inner girl in the strait jacket feeling like we've lost our mind completely dealing with our love life!

The story is fun for both guys & girls & told in such a creative way! I recommend to go check it out on Amazon or iTunes & feel better knowing that we all have a little spicy Vivica Fox inside us.
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8/10
If you like Woody Allen, you will like this movie.
brian-862-6510845 December 2013
My wife loves romantic comedies, so I get to see more of them than I might care to, but this one is worth watching. The characters are well developed, the dialogue is crisp and clever, and there's a palpable chemistry between the two leads. All of the actors are first rate, delivering the goods on several "laugh out loud" moments throughout the film. In particular, Ross McCall is excellent in the lead role, carrying the film from start to finish with the self-assured acting chops of just about any leading man you can think of.

I really look forward to seeing how Nathan Ives, the writer/director of It's Not You, It's Me, follows up on this project. He has a real ear for dialogue, reminding me of Woody Allen, if a bit more testosterone-driven and only slightly less neurotic.
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9/10
Really really funny story that's fairly unpredictable.
archiecm21 March 2014
Warning: Spoilers
I might have given it an "8" but I wanted to counterbalance the "7's" it got from reviewers whose words heaped praise on the film yet who's number grades didn't match those words. I laughed a lot during this film. Dave, (Ross McCall) can't commit to buying a Chai latte and so his feeling queasy about staying with his girlfriend isn't all that surprising. It REALLY IS ABOUT HIM since Carrie (Joelle Carter) is just about perfect. What gives the story punch is the committee inside Dave's head who vote on whether or not to dump Carrie. The most vocal is Neil, a misogynistic philanderer who never expresses a tender feeling for anything. He gets the most lines but the others are quite funny as well. There's Dave's inner child, Dave's accountant voice, Dave's morbid fascination with death voice and a pretty blonde female, the only one, who is sensitive and is seeking (for Dave)a meaningful lasting relationship with a good woman. She gets voted down a lot. The way they trade insults is part of the fun. But the negative voices win out and Dave dumps a perfectly good (and also pretty) girlfriend. The movie then splits into what happens to these two characters concentrating more on Dave. Carrie has a series of bad dates the funniest of which is with a man who "falls" for her in the first ten minutes. Her reaction, out loud, is to say she's changing her address and phone number and it doesn't even stop him from gushing some more. There's also a Trekkie, and a really self-absorbed Yuppie. Dave goes into therapy and does some delving into his past where the trauma occurred which instigated all his fear. This is glossed over and while there may not have been time to cover it in more detail, the quickness of it made me not believe his transformation that he professes to in the final scene. I didn't want Carrie to believe him because I didn't see enough evidence to support the change. I won't give away the ending but I wound up accepting it. It wasn't the one I expected.

I happen to have this same problem in my own life (fear of falling and committing) and so I had a keen interest in the outcome. I'm not sure I learned from the story but that goes more to the complexity of the problem than the effectiveness of the film. I was impressed with the quality of the production and acting. It didn't have an indie feel, more like a normal Hollywood movie. I hope it gets widely seen.

I should add that Carrie had a committee as well but her "voices" weren't as amusing to watch. Perhaps the reason for that was that they didn't strike as many chords that exist out there in the real world. The closest was Carrie's inner child who wanted to be loved and held. There was a woman in a straight jacket who was too over the top, a black chick who was too cold and calculating, and a hippie (male) who was so ephemeral and wispy that there wasn't a single utterance of his that showed even the slightest knowledge of what life is. Being pathetic isn't funny to me. I was missing the biting humor that was frequent in Dave's inner world.
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8/10
Funny and Heartwarming
katecolley19809 December 2013
Really enjoyed this film, it's a window into the mind of how guys (and girls) think. Dialogue is sharp and witty. Chemistry between the two lead actors was great.

I'm originally from LA and it's kind of a postcard to Los Angeles as well. Some beautiful shots of downtown and what look like Silverlake. It nicely avoided the cliché' beach scenes so typical of films shot in LA.

It was great seeing 'Janice' from friends in a more serious role. She plays a wonderful therapist in the film.

A little slow here and there, but not bad. Over all I would definitely recommend it.
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10/10
An Indie Gem
jameslee10110 February 2014
It's rare that you see an independent film that's very well produced AND very entertaining! Nathan Ives manages to put together a very unique perspective on a story about relationships, breakups, and coming-of-age. His cast are consistently top-notch, and keep you engaged in the narrative that we've all been through at one point or another. Nathan uses interesting conventions to communicate his protagonist's internal struggles, and doesn't shy away from taking these conventions to their furthest (and most honest) logical extent! This film effectively adds to the genre that is the romantic comedy, and avoids falling into easy conventions.
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10/10
Smart and funny!
purpledreamer7 December 2013
A smart and funny film about relationships. Unique way of using the "voices" in your head/self-conscious help tell a story. Thoroughly enjoyable, fun and something we can all relate to. The cast is amazing with excellent work from Ross McCall and Joelle Carter. Screenwriter and director Nathan Ives does an excellent job bringing the thought process of what you go through in a relationship to life. This is definitely not a chick-flick! It appeals to both males and females. The story telling through the different parts of your mind is smart and brings it more to life. It's funny when it needs to be and sincere when it needs to be. Definitely a film to watch over and over.
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10/10
An amazing film
sives-449-924955 November 2013
My cousin Nathan Ives put a lot of heart & soul into the writing, producing, and directing of this movie, so I am a bit biased when it comes to reviewing it. With that being said however, there is no doubt it is one of the best relationship comedies I have seen, and I was proud to play a small part it in.

It examines many of the thoughts that are going on inside of anyone in a relationship who has reached the point of asking should I continue on with this relationship or should I should I move on. So if your at all curious about a funny take on this age old question, check out this movie.
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Screening of "It's Not You, It's Me"
tresasnell30 October 2013
I was invited to see the film "It's Not You, It's Me. and I really enjoyed it. The love the creativity of the storyline. That way of live really do exist and sometimes we are not sure what to listen to. I can definitely identify with being surrounded with so many different choices. Not one time did I ever get bored or did I got lost. Nathan's ideas and writing revealed how easy it is to get caught up, lost, regretful and damaged all at the same time. I applaud Nathan on his creativity and thought process. The actors all did a awesome job and did a well in portraying those thoughts and feelings. Greay job Nathan and keep those creative juices flowing! I look to see your name on the screen a lot more!
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8/10
Great grown up version of coming-of-age film
paddywacknapa31 October 2013
Loved this subtle, well-acted indie film for taking on commitment phobia without making slapstick of it. Both of the lead characters are followed around by the embodiment of conflicting voices in their head -- a great technique for illustrating the conflicting responses all of us have to people and relationships.

Film maker and director Nathan Ives admits that the story idea is autobiographical, probably explaining the depth in which the angst of "should I or shouldn't I?" is explored.

I thought of it as a little on the "chick flick" side, but the middle-aged man I saw it with thought it gave real dimension to a male point of view.
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8/10
Screening of It's Not You, It's Me.
rhondaf-843-19727113 November 2013
The movie had a great idea (people representing sides/thoughts of each couple). It's a small budget film (done in 8 days) but it had real-to-life scenes like the trains going by, etc. which makes it feel that it's not so small budget. And, with several known actors (who did a good job), it's worth taking the time to see this film.

I thought it was a little heavy on Dave's testosterone levels... (a few too many F-words for me and a little too much sex for a romantic comedy) but that trails off early enough to sit and really enjoy a chick flick. And for you guys.. guess you can enjoy the testosterone levels at the beginning of the movie.. and then let your girl curl up next to you as you watch the rest.
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9/10
Ever have a movie that get in your head?
SpacemanSpiff42029 October 2013
I'm always on the lookout for great little indie movies and in "It's Not You, It's Me," I've found one I was shocked at watching this movie because these were the exact things that were going through my head when i was dealing with all my commitment issues in my 20s and 30s. It showed my fears of both loneliness, commitment, choices and regret. And it added the woman's perspective so know I know they were going through the same thing. The ensemble cast is really great. Each "internal" character fits their role from the kid to the player to accountant. Ross McCall is phenomenal as the lead. Jolee Carter is great You wonder why he would leave her but then again you've done it yourself time and time again. I'd definitely recommend it.
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8/10
Clever, Funny Independent RomCom
markhenrybloom29 November 2013
Filmed with the Red camera, this movie provides gorgeous shots of Los Angeles as the story unfolds. A great cast makes it work, since much of the movie is made up of internal dialog. But work it does. The annoying main character becomes heart-warming by the end, and I rooted for him to complete his transformation. You will too.

This low-budget movie should make you realize that Hollywood movies no longer have a monopoly on the film industry. I think in the years ahead, you'll see more independent films like this one, with name actors, professionally made, beautifully shot, and artistically realized. At least I hope so. I will throw up if I have to sit through one more Will Farrell or Adam Sandler "comedy." Thank you, Nathan Ives, for raising the bar for all indie movies. If you like romantic comedies, find this film and watch it for yourself. You'll be delighted.
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10/10
Must see!
claudiacox-118 April 2014
I'm not usually a fan of romantic comedies as they tend to be clichéd, cheesy, and generally speaking, mindless. But this movie is none of that! I found it to be original and entertaining, and even thought provoking.

And if you happen to a single person trying to understand why romantic relationships are so challenging, I think you will find the film to be educational in an amusing "laugh at ourselves" kind of way. That's all I can say without giving too much away!

Brilliant writing and direction, great acting, and being from Los Angeles, I loved how the city was represented. I am very much looking forward to seeing Nathan Ives future films!
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Surprisingly good, refreshing take on what makes relationships sink or swim
sharonlynnjoyce14 May 2018
Most rom-coms make me cringe and I figured this would fall into that camp. But the voices in each person's head are endearing and realistic. The many conflicting things you want to say and do, during a break up, were all there. Smart, funny little film.
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