- Brittany S. Pierce: Sam, when you first joined the glee club, I didn't notice for a while. It wasn't until you did a Rich Little impression and then told me it was a Rich Little impression and then explained who Rich Little was that I knew you were special. And I can't tell you how excited I am to become your Mayan star-wife.
- Burt Hummel: [to Kurt] Look, can I just give you one piece of advice while we're still talking father to son? This is three times I've had to stare death in the eye, and you know the one thing I took away from all that? You have got to love the people you love close to you no matter what.
- Sam Evans: Brittany, it's December 22. Do you know what this means? We survived the Mayan Apocalypse.
- Brittany S. Pierce: We're also married.
- Sam Evans: Brittany, I've always thought you were super hot and really smart, but what I didn't know was that you were going to end up being my soulmate. Who knows what the future holds for us. Probably tsunamis and horrible sea monsters, but I'm not worried about that because I have you.
- Noah 'Puck' Puckerman: Hey! One Puckerman just ate your lunch! What do you think's gonna happen when we unload two barrels of Puckshot into your ugly mugs?