Modern Family (TV Series)

The Butler's Escape (2012)

Sofía Vergara: Gloria Delgado-Pritchett

Quotes 

• Gloria Delgado-Pritchett : I am not mad at you because you told me that I snore. I am mad at you because you *didn't* say anything.

  Jay Pritchett : 'Cause I didn't wanna get yelled at.

  Gloria Delgado-Pritchett : Well, too bad. When you're married to me, you're going to get yelled at *many* times. And you're tough enough to take it. That's what I love about our marriage. We can say whatever we want, but the next day, we're still there.

  Jay Pritchett : That's what I like about it, too.

  [Hugs Gloria] 

  Jay Pritchett : Ah. What am I gonna say you couldn't forgive me?

  Gloria Delgado-Pritchett : There are things, Jay.

  Jay Pritchett : You ready to go?

  Gloria Delgado-Pritchett : I was thinking, it's such a shame that this hotel room is going to go to waste.

  Jay Pritchett : I like where this is headed.

  Gloria Delgado-Pritchett : [Taking his hotel room key]  Make Manny some pasta. I'll see you tomorrow morning, okay?

• Gloria Delgado-Pritchett : You told me that you were in 'Frisco, and you were here in a hotel?

  Jay Pritchett : Let me just say one thing. Don't say 'Frisco. They hate that. And how the hell did you find me?

• Gloria Delgado-Pritchett : Ay, Jay, I'm going to miss you.

  Jay Pritchett : It's one night.

  Gloria Delgado-Pritchett : No, I don't want to be without you, not even one night in my whole life. What can I make you?

  Jay Pritchett : [Cut to interview]  How about a little room on my side of the bed? I mean, I shouldn't complain. My wife's a knockout. But... she's at that place in her pregnancy where she's, you know... ample. And the snoring. I swear, in the last ultrasound, the baby was like this.

  [Holds his hands over his ears] 

• Manny Delgado : Mom, I'm fully aware of the changes your body is going through, and that nasal stuffiness is very common during pregnancy, but we got a crisis in this house. You've been snoring. But I got you these nasal strips. In the commercial, the old man's angry red sound waves turn a gentle blue.

  Gloria Delgado-Pritchett : So I'm like an old man?

  Manny Delgado : No!

  Gloria Delgado-Pritchett : Like a dog, then? A pig? What is it, Manny? I'm an old man, a dog, or a pig?

  Manny Delgado : Jay, help me out here. You've heard it.

  Jay Pritchett : I don't know what the boy's talking about. If this is a glimpse of teenage Manny, I don't love it. Have a little respect for your beautiful mother.

  Gloria Delgado-Pritchett : [loudly blowing her nose]  Thank you, Jay.