Modern Family (TV Series)

Arrested (2012)

Sarah Hyland: Haley Dunphy

Photos 

Quotes 

• Haley Dunphy : In Legally Blonde, Elle won her case because she was true to herself and dressed cute.

  Phil Dunphy : Haley, this is real life, not an excellent movie.

• Haley Dunphy : Why are you guys acting like this is my fault? Everybody was drinking, everybody ran. I just got caught. If anything, I'm the victim here.

  Phil Dunphy : What? Just stop... just stop talking, Haley. You're not the victim here, you're the one who screwed up! You made one bad decision after another, now you're about to blow everything your mother and I worked so hard to give you. And the worst thing is, you don't seem to care. We all got up at 3:00 a.m. this morning to bail you out of jail! We haven't eaten a thing. And you know what I haven't heard from you yet? "I'm sorry, Mom. I screwed up, Dad. Please forgive me." Now, put on some real clothes. We'll see you at the hearing. Do not be late! Come on.

  [Phil and Claire turn to leave] 

  Haley Dunphy : Where are you going?

  Claire Dunphy : To get that man a waffle!

• Claire Dunphy : You okay?

  Haley Dunphy : Yeah, I'm fine, mom.

  Claire Dunphy : Oh! What the hell were you thinking?

  Phil Dunphy : What happened?

  Haley Dunphy : Well, it's not a big deal, okay? There was a party, and people were drinking, so the police showed up. And everybody ran, so I did, too. And I started climbing down this fire escape, and then I heard a cop yell to put your hands up, so I did, and I fell... onto him.

  Claire Dunphy : You could have been killed. Haley, you're supposed to be an adult. How could you do something so childish...

  Phil Dunphy : Okay, okay, okay, okay.

  Claire Dunphy : ...and stupid?

  Phil Dunphy : Let's... let's calm down. We're all a little tired and cranky. Best thing we can do right now is get out of here, go get some waffles...

  Claire Dunphy : I don't want waffles, Phil, okay? I'm upset and I want to do deal with this.

  Mitchell Pritchett : All right, I got some bad news here. Um, this afternoon, Haley has to appear before a disciplinary board, which will decide whether or not she gets kicked out of school.

  Claire Dunphy : What?

  Phil Dunphy : Oh...

  Mitchell Pritchett : Oh, wait. Wait, no. I got that wrong. Oh, no, I got it right! Yes! Score. One for me.

• Haley Dunphy : I really am sorry.

  Claire Dunphy : We appreciate that.

  Phil Dunphy : It's good that you stepped up today.

  Claire Dunphy : Yeah. Sometimes it's healthy to get a fresh start.

  Haley Dunphy : [picking up a box of belongings]  Ugh. I can't believe this. What am I gonna do?

  Phil Dunphy : Well, they said you could reapply next year.

  Claire Dunphy : In the meantime, you're gonna get a job and you're gonna take some classes.

  Haley Dunphy : Well, I'm gonna buckle down and get a lot more serious.

  Phil Dunphy : Good for you.

  Claire Dunphy : Yeah.

  Phil Dunphy : Where are my keys?

  Haley Dunphy : Oh, they're right there on the makeup table.

  Claire Dunphy : Oh, honey. That's a desk.

• Alex Dunphy : Oh, my god. What are you doing here?

  Haley Dunphy : I got kicked out. So go ahead, make your jokes. Get it out of your system.

  Alex Dunphy : [giving her a hug]  No, that's horrible. I'm so sorry. It'll be fine. I'm sure of it.

  Haley Dunphy : Thank you. Ew, what did you do to my room?

  Alex Dunphy : Well, it's not exactly your room. It's... it's mine.

  Haley Dunphy : This goes. This goes. I hate *that*. This is ugly.

  Alex Dunphy : Haley, stop!

  Haley Dunphy , Alex Dunphy : Mom!

  Haley Dunphy : What is this, a solar system?

  Alex Dunphy : It's molecules.

  Haley Dunphy : They're nerdy balls.

  Luke Dunphy : Alex, don't fight with her. She might have a shiv. We cool?

• Aidan Schwartz : You are charged with public drunkenness, resisting arrest, and assaulting a police officer, all of which obviously violate our school's code of conduct.

  Mitchell Pritchett : Sir, if I may speak on behalf of my client...

  Dean Miller : Who are you?

  Mitchell Pritchett : I'm Mitchell Pritchett, I'm Ms. Dunphy's attorney.

  Aidan Schwartz : We require students to speak for themselves. There are no attorneys allowed. You shouldn't even be here.

  Mitchell Pritchett : What if I just sat in this chair and I was really super-quiet and I just listen?

  Aidan Schwartz : I'll allow it.

  Dean Miller : Knock it off, Aidan. Ms. Dunphy, is there anything you would like to say in your defense?

  Haley Dunphy : Actually, I have no defense. I was drinking. I am underage. I ran from the police. And even though it was an accident, I injured an officer. I am very, very sorry. I've made a lot of bad decisions since I've been here, and it's time I take some responsibility. Like sometimes in the dining hall, I slip my pinky under the scale when they weigh my salad. Also, I've missed more morning classes than I've been to. I don't know what the policy is on dating TAs, but I think I broke it. Twice.

  Phil Dunphy : [quietly]  Oh, man.

  Haley Dunphy : And if we're gonna be completely honest, on my application to get in here, I lied about the fact that I was...

  Phil Dunphy : Uh, objection!

  Aidan Schwartz : On what grounds?

  Mitchell Pritchett : Oh, he gets to say it? He gets...

  Dean Miller : Ms. Dunphy. Ms. Dunphy, we appreciate your... candor. Is there anything else you'd like to add?

  Haley Dunphy : Go Wildcats?

  Dean Miller : Oh, boy.

  Aidan Schwartz : That's not even our mascot.

• Claire Dunphy : What are you wearing?

  Haley Dunphy : What? What's wrong with it?

  Claire Dunphy : Honey, you are fighting for your future in front of a disciplinary committee, not entertaining the Secret Service.

• Dean Miller : Haley Dunphy?

  Haley Dunphy : Yes, that's me.

  Dean Miller : I'm Dean Miller with Admissions. This is Professor Williams.

  Haley Dunphy : Hi.

  Dean Miller : And this is our student representative, Aidan Feldman.

  Haley Dunphy : Nice to meet you.

  Aidan Schwartz : Seriously? We sit next to each other in Econ.

  Haley Dunphy : Oh, right. You...

  Aidan Schwartz : Don't. It insults both of us. Mostly me.

  Dean Miller : Move it along, Aidan. This is a disciplinary hearing, not JDate.

• Phil Dunphy : Look, this has got to be some kind of mistake. Our daughter's tiny. There's no way she assaulted anyone. Insulted, maybe. Was... was the cop wearing white socks and dark shoes? 'Cause that really sets her off.

  Police Officer : [showing them footage from a dashboard camera]  Maybe you should watch this.

  Phil Dunphy , Claire Dunphy , Mitchell Pritchett : Ooh!

  Mitchell Pritchett : Okay. No, but... that's very blurry footage. How can we be sure that that's Haley?

  Haley Dunphy : Don't hurt me! I'm just a student! I'm Haley Dunphy!