Game of Thrones (TV Series)

The Lion and the Rose (2014)

Nikolaj Coster-Waldau: Jaime Lannister

Photos 

Quotes 

• [at Joffrey's wedding, Loras exchanges flirtatious gazes with Oberyn Martell. He walks backwards and bumps into Jaime] 

  Loras Tyrell : Ser Jaime, I'm very sorry.

  Jaime Lannister : Ser Loras, it's quite all right.

  [Jaime watches Margaery] 

  Jaime Lannister : Your sister looks very beautiful.

  Loras Tyrell : As does yours.

  Jaime Lannister : So... looking forward to your wedding?

  [Loras pauses slightly before answering] 

  Loras Tyrell : Yes, very much.

  Jaime Lannister : Our fathers are both rather keen on the prospect.

  Loras Tyrell : They certainly are.

  Jaime Lannister : Perhaps they should get married.

  [they chuckle] 

  Jaime Lannister : If you were to marry Cersei, she'd murder you in your sleep.

  [Loras' smile fades and he frowns] 

  Jaime Lannister : If you somehow managed to put a child in her first, she'd murder him, too, long before he drew his first breath. Luckily for you, none of this will happen because you'll never marry her.

  Loras Tyrell : [nods]  And neither will you.

  [Loras walks away] 

• [Jaime and Tyrion are eating dinner together; Jaime hasn't touched his food] 

  Tyrion Lannister : Your new hand is nicer than the old one. Wouldn't you agree, Pod?

  Podrick Payne : Is it solid gold?

  Tyrion Lannister : Gilded steel. Not eating. Why is no one eating? My wife wastes away, my brother starves himself...

  Jaime Lannister : I'm not hungry.

  Tyrion Lannister : You lost a hand, not a stomach. Try the boar. Cersei can't get enough since one killed Robert for her.

  [Pod steps forward with a sausage on a fork, but Jaime waves it away. Tyrion picks up his cup of wine] 

  Tyrion Lannister : A toast. To the proud Lannister children: the dwarf, the cripple, and the mother of madness.

  [Jaime reaches for his cup, but he accidentally knocks it over with his new hand] 

  Podrick Payne : I'll clean it up...

  Jaime Lannister : No, I'll do it. Leave us.

  [Pod leaves; Tyrion spills his wine onto the table] 

  Tyrion Lannister : It's only wine.

  [pause] 

  Jaime Lannister : [quietly]  I can't fight anymore.

  Tyrion Lannister : What about your left?

  Jaime Lannister : I can hold a sword, but all my instincts are wrong. How can I protect the king when I can hardly wipe my own arse?

  Tyrion Lannister : You're the Lord Commander now. Command. Let others do the fighting. When was the last time Father used a sword?

  Jaime Lannister : I'm not Father, I'm the Kingslayer. When people find out I can't slay a pigeon...

  Tyrion Lannister : Train, then. Learn to fight with your other hand.

  Jaime Lannister : With whom? You? Men talk. As soon as someone discovers I can't fight, he'll tell everyone.

  [Tyrion considers that for a moment] 

  Tyrion Lannister : You need a proper, discreet swordsman. As it happens, I have just the one.

• [Bronn meets Jaime in an isolated place for training] 

  Jaime Lannister : My brother tells me you can keep your mouth shut. Unusual talent for a sellsword.

  Bronn : He tells me you shit gold. Just like your father.

  Jaime Lannister : Is this place safe?

  [Jaime throws Bronn a pouch of money. Bronn opens the pouch and examines its contents] 

  Bronn : There's this knight, uh, Leygood. Got thunderbolts on his shield?

  Jaime Lannister : Uh-huh.

  Bronn : Right here is where I fuck his wife. She's a screamer, that one. If they don't hear her, they won't hear us.

  [Jaime unsheathes his sword] 

  Bronn : [whistles]  I've never seen Valyrian steel before. She's a beauty. Problem is, if you fight with an edged blade, I'll have to. And if I fight with an edged blade, I'll have no one left to pay me.

  [Bronn pulls out two blunted training swords and drops one on the ground] 

  Jaime Lannister : [grumpily]  I haven't used a sparring sword since I was nine.

  [Jaime reaches down to pick up his sword, but Bronn swats it out of his hand] 

  Jaime Lannister : Ahh! Bold warrior you are, attacking a man when his guard's down.

  Bronn : Best time to attack a man!

  [Jaime barely has time to pick up his sword, before Bronn lunges at him. They spar for a few seconds, before Bronn pushes Jaime into a wall] 

  Bronn : Mind yourself.

  Jaime Lannister : If I still had my right hand...

  Bronn : Plan on growing it back?

  [they continue to spar; Bronn almost knocks Jaime over, and Jaime waves him off. Breathing heavily, Jaime repositions himself with a determined look on his face] 

  Jaime Lannister : Come on, then.

  [they resume sparring] 

• [Tyrion serves wine to Joffrey] 

  Joffrey Baratheon : [drinks]  Mmm. Good. Needs washing down.

  Tyrion Lannister : If it please, your Grace, Lady Sansa is very tired...

  Joffrey Baratheon : No.

  [Joffrey coughs] 

  Joffrey Baratheon : You'll wait here... un...

  Tyrion Lannister : Your Grace?

  Joffrey Baratheon : [sips more wine]  It's nothing!

  [Joffrey gasps for breath. Margaery sees shock on his face] 

  Margaery Tyrell : He's choking!

  [Tywin and Cersei shift their chairs in a panic] 

  Olenna Tyrell : Help the poor boy!

  [Joffrey staggers from the table, dying, choking and dropping the goblet] 

  Olenna Tyrell : Idiots! Help your king!

  Jaime Lannister : Move away!

  [Joffrey collapses, convulsing and vomiting] 

  Jaime Lannister : Joffrey! Joffrey!

  Cersei Lannister : Help him! Someone help him!

  Jaime Lannister : Joffrey!

  Cersei Lannister : Joffrey!

  [Dontos appears behind Sansa] 

  Dontos Hollard : Come with me now.

  Cersei Lannister : Joffrey! Joffrey!

  Dontos Hollard : [to Sansa]  If you want to live, we have to leave.

  Cersei Lannister : Don't touch him! Joffrey! Please! My God, what is it? Help him!

  [Joffrey points accusingly at Tyrion, who is examining the goblet]