Jessie (TV Series)

G.I. Jessie (2013)

James Patrick Stuart: Lt. Colonel John Wayne 'J.W.' Prescott

Photos 

Quotes 

• Jessie Prescott : [running up to Emma and sees her with Caleb]  Emma, what are you doing with Darla's brother?

  Emma Ross : [gazing into his eyes]  Watching his eyes sparkle in the sunlight! See, it's happening right now. And now. And now!

  Darla Shannon : [approaching Caleb and Emma]  Caleb! Stay away from them! You don't wanna be seen with these weaklings!

  Jessie Prescott : [scoffs]  Who're you calling "weak"? You should see this one tear through the mall on Black Friday!

  [Darla stares at Jessie, confused] 

  Emma Ross : [holding up her nails]  I sharpen my nails with diamonds the night before.

  Caleb Shannon : [coming over to Emma]  I love a girl who fights for what she wants!

  Emma Ross : [linking arms with Caleb]  I'd shop for *you* in the hunks department!

  Jessie Prescott , Darla Shannon : [in unison, to Emma and Caleb]  KNOCK IT OFF!

  Emma Ross , Caleb Shannon : [in unison]  WHY?

  Darla Shannon : Because the Prescott's and the Shannon's are sworn enemies.

  Emma Ross : But I'm not a Prescott *or* a Shannon!

  Jessie Prescott : Oh, there's a babysitting clause in the feud; it's... it's complicated; but trust me, you're covered!

  Emma Ross : But I really like Caleb!

  Darla Shannon : Well, tough! You can't go against the feud! Huh, *which* has gone back for years all the way to the 20th century!

  Caleb Shannon : I don't know why our families are fighting!

  Darla Shannon : It all started when our grand pappy Shannon loaned their grand pappy Prescott a corn picker; and he returned it broken!

  Jessie Prescott : It was already broken! Your grand pappy lied to get a new corn picker!

  [Darla chuckles softly and tries to shake it off] 

  Jessie Prescott : That's why they called him "Shifty Shannon"!

  Caleb Shannon : But that's all ancient history!

  Emma Ross : No one even *remembers* the 20th century!

  Darla Shannon : Well, I *do* remember when Jessie borrowed and broke my Queasy Bake Oven!

  Jessie Prescott : It was already broken!

  Darla Shannon : Typical Prescott!

  Emma Ross : Well, Caleb and I don't care about you're shifty grand pappies and your queasy corn pickers!

  Jessie Prescott : [scoffs]  Then *you* are no Prescott!

  Emma Ross : Correct! Despite whatever paperwork you have to the contrary!

  Jessie Prescott : [sees Mrs Kipling approach the dog, Paton, then he whips her tail at Paton]  See? Even Mrs. Kipling's tiny *lizard brain* understands the feud!

  [Mrs Kipling hits Jessie with her tail] 

  Jessie Prescott : Sorry!

  Darla Shannon : [to Caleb]  Caleb, stay away from Emma, OK?

  [then turns to Jessie and says] 

  Darla Shannon : [then turns to Jessie and says]  Like all us cool kids stayed away from Jessie in high school, heh!

  [pulling Caleb by the arm] 

  Darla Shannon : Come on!

  [Caleb walks away from Emma, being dragged by Darla] 

  Jessie Prescott : [calling out after Darla]  Yeah, like I wanted to hang out with you anyway! In the *jerk lounge*, cause you're a JERK!

  Lt. Colonel John Wayne 'J.W.' Prescott : [appearing behind Jessie and heard what she said]  JESSIE! I can't believe you said that!

  Jessie Prescott : Yeah, I know. I should've gone with "loser lounge".

  Lt. Colonel John Wayne 'J.W.' Prescott : I mean, I can't believe you just insulted her!

  Emma Ross : I can't believe you and Darla are ruining my life!

  [running off] 

  Jessie Prescott : OK, she didn't break it down, but it's like 95% Darla.

  Lt. Colonel John Wayne 'J.W.' Prescott : I specifically told you to get along with Darla, and once again, you can't follow a simple order!

  Jessie Prescott : You're my *dad*, not my drill sergeant! You can't order me around anymore! I'm an adult!

  Lt. Colonel John Wayne 'J.W.' Prescott : Oh really? Cause you're sure acting like a child!

  Jessie Prescott : Nuh-uh! She started it!

  Lt. Colonel John Wayne 'J.W.' Prescott : I rest my case! You know I was really hoping we weren't gonna argue this weekend, but instead we were right back where we left off. This visit's turning out to be very disappointing.

  [Jessie's dad walks off, upset] 

• Lt. Colonel John Wayne 'J.W.' Prescott : [Jessie's dad has caught out Jessie and the kids; after seeing Luke, Zuri and Ravi stick goo onto Darla and sticking her to the wall]  JESSIE!

  Col. Beverly Shannon : [seeing Darla stuck to the wall]  Oh, my stars and stripes! Dar-Dar, is that you?

  Darla Shannon : [stuck to the wall in goo]  Yes, Mummy! Look what they did to me!

  Col. Beverly Shannon : Oh, dear! You look like one of those hideous aliens from Area 51!

  [Jessie, the kids, Darla and Jessie's dad look at her weirdly, with a brief pause] 

  Col. Beverly Shannon : Which completely does not exist.

  [gives them a threatening stare and points at them] 

  Col. Beverly Shannon : And if any of you dare to mention this conversation, there will be a probing in your future!

  [the kids look at each other] 

  Jessie Prescott : [Jessie looks at her dad, worried]  Dad, I know what you're thinking; but, any time there's trouble,

  [points at Darla] 

  Jessie Prescott : Darla is the one who starts it!

  Lt. Colonel John Wayne 'J.W.' Prescott : [looks at the kids, in the B.A.T; and Darla stuck to the wall]  So did she start this?

  Jessie Prescott : [looks at the kids and Darla awkwardly]  OK, maybe this time is a bad example.

  Lt. Colonel John Wayne 'J.W.' Prescott : I've asked you to try and get along with Darla, but instead, you attack her with experimental weaponry?

  Jessie Prescott : [Jessie has had enough of her dad forcing her to get along with Darla]  Why do you care so much if I get along with Darla? After this trip, I'll never have to see her again!

  Lt. Colonel John Wayne 'J.W.' Prescott : Oh, yes, you will, because you and Darla are going to be *sisters*!

  Jessie Prescott : [Jessie is shocked at the thought of becoming Darla's step-sister]  WHAT?

  Col. Beverly Shannon : [looking at Jessie and Darla]  That's right, girls. My armored heart has been captured by this

  [looking at J.W] 

  Col. Beverly Shannon : uniformed yum-yum!

  [Beverly and J.W smooch in front of Jessie and Darla and both of them express looks of disgust] 

  Lt. Colonel John Wayne 'J.W.' Prescott : So, we wanted you to become friends before we told you, but now, we're out of time.

  [looking at Beverly, smiling] 

  Lt. Colonel John Wayne 'J.W.' Prescott : Our wedding is tomorrow.

  Jessie Prescott : [shocked and confused]  Wait, tomorrow? As in... the day after today?

  Col. Beverly Shannon : Yes, if I can wait that long.

  [looking into space] 

  Col. Beverly Shannon : The only man I've had in my life for the last 10 years is Uncle Sam.

  [doing the Uncle Sam pose at J.W] 

  Col. Beverly Shannon : Now I want *you*!

  Jessie Prescott : [shocked]  Wait, so, *that's* why you wanted me to come home?

  Lt. Colonel John Wayne 'J.W.' Prescott : Yes! And that's why I invited *you*

  [looking at the kids] 

  Lt. Colonel John Wayne 'J.W.' Prescott : , not these little threats to national security! Now, get out of my B.A.T! I had the seat just where I liked it!

  Ravi Ross : [the kids slowly start to get out of the B.A.T]  We are extremely sorry, sir. Even though I did not do anything, and it was all Luke's fault.

  [Ravi accidentally presses a button on the B.A.T and it foams both J.W and Beverly] 

  Ravi Ross : OK, that one is on me. By the way, for the wedding; can you put me down for a vegetarian meal?

  [Beverly and JW look at the kids in horror, trying to get the foam off]