- Maritza: This isn't what you think. I'm not a killer.
- Dean Winchester: Well, then, what are you?
- Maritza: I'm a pishtaco.
- Dean Winchester: A fish taco?
- Sam Winchester: My uh Ashtanza yoga class starts in 5 minutes.
- Dean Winchester: How the hell do you know anything about yoga?
- Sam Winchester: You're not the only one who ever dated someone bendy.
- Slim Jim Morgan: He cheated!
- Wayne McNut: Hey, back off, Skeletor. I won fair and square.
- Slim Jim Morgan: Like hell you did, Jabba! I saw you slip a hot dog in your pocket!
- Wayne McNut: Well, I hate to break it to you, pal, but that's no hot dog.
- Sam Winchester: Is your old lady superstitious?
- Slim Jim Morgan: Yah. She's Romanichal.
- Dean Winchester: [confused] Romanichal?
- Sam Winchester: Gypsy.
- Slim Jim Morgan: But don't call her that. She says it's reductive. But I think it's a compliment. I mean, gypsies are all the rage on TV, "My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding," "Gypsy Sisters"..."Keeping up with the Kardashians."
- Dean Winchester: Nice shorts.
- Sam Winchester: Nice hairnet.
- Dean Winchester: Yeah, why do I got to be the lunch lady?
- Sam Winchester: Since when have you ever complained about being around food?
- Slim Jim Morgan: Training. When I gear up for a competition, I eat lettuce. It stretches the stomach.
- Dean Winchester: Yet another reason to stay away from salads.
- Dean Winchester: He got attacked in his car, but, get this -- he shrunk from 300 pounds to 90 pounds.
- Sam Winchester: Witchcraft?
- Dean Winchester: Or a heavy-duty laxative
- Dean Winchester: These aren't "supplements", they're roofies.
- Sam Winchester: What? How do you know what roofies look like?
- Dean Winchester: How do you not know? You think I want to end up in a hotel bathtub with my kidney carved out? In Chechnya?
- Sam Winchester: Competitive-eating circuit? Is that a big thing out here?
- Sheriff Donna Hanscum: Oh, yeah. You betcha. Folks take it real seriously; train for months. Eat all sorts of wackadoo stuff, you know, like, uh... Baked beans, buff wings, butter.
- Dean Winchester: Butter?
- Sheriff Donna Hanscum: Yeah. Sometimes deep-fried.
- Dean Winchester: Hm.
- Sheriff Donna Hanscum: This year alone, Wayne won the Butter Bowl, the Wing Ding, and Shrimptasia.
- Sam Winchester: Any idea what the vic weighed beforehand?
- Deputy Cooper: 165.
- Dean Winchester: So, 180. Known fact... all women lie about their weight and age.
- Sam Winchester: Wait, you told that waitress the other day you were 29.