Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV Series)

Eye Spy (2013)

Brett Dalton: Grant Ward

Photos 

Quotes 

• Melinda May : Bus to short bus.

  Grant Ward : Go for short bus.

  Phil Coulson : Next time I'll decide what we call ourselves, OK.

• Skye : I called with an equally pressing question for you, my S.O... What are we supposed to do if we have to pee?

  Grant Ward : [unamused]  You broke protocol because you needed a bathroom break.

  Skye : It was a really, really long drive and everyone's nervous.

  Grant Ward : [sighs]  There's a container at the bottom of the blue chest.

  Skye : [to Simmons]  Bottom of the blue chest.

  [Simmons and goes digging and pulls out an empty water bottle. She gives Skye a look] 

  Skye : Not the *water bottle*.

  Grant Ward : That's the one.

  Skye : Did you never learn the thing where boy parts and girl parts are different, and our parts aren't penises!

  Grant Ward : Coulson and I are trying to find a dangerous criminal, if there's nothing else pressing...

  Skye : One more thing, Fitz wants to know if you packed any snacks.

  Leo Fitz : [Into the phone]  I'm feeling a bit peckish.

  Skye : [There's a noise on the other end]  Ah, Hello, hello? He hung *up*!

• Phil Coulson : Have you seen Skye?

  Grant Ward : Not since weapons training.

  Phil Coulson : She stop saying "bang" when she pulls the trigger?

  Grant Ward : Mostly. Now if she can just learn the difference between the safety release and the magazine release, we will be making real progress.

• Grant Ward : Let's hope it's a knockout and not a kill.

  Skye : You should get out of there.

  Grant Ward : [Resolute]  I've come this far. I'll finish, whatever it takes.

  [Message appears: SEDUCE HIM] 

  Grant Ward : Help.

  Skye : Did you say, "help"? Because a minute ago, you said you didn't want or need my help.

  Grant Ward : That was *before* they asked me to go all Mata Hari on this guy.

• Grant Ward : [Fitz and Ward are playing poker on the plane]  I call, and raise a hundred.

  Leo Fitz : Do you know how I'm gonna beat you?

  Grant Ward : By losing?

  Leo Fitz : You have a tell. A psychological tick that lets me know you're bluffing. If I watch you carefully...

  [louder, into his earpiece] 

  Leo Fitz : If I watch you carefully...

  Skye : [In another room]  Oh, sorry. One minute.

  [Grabs the eye-spy x-ray glasses] 

  Skye : You know that if I do this, I'll not only see Ward's cards, I'll see you without any clothes on?

  Leo Fitz : [to Ward]  ... I fold, you win.

  [Scurries away] 

• Skye : What do they mean "target"?

  Grant Ward : It's never good, especially for the target.

• Grant Ward : I've come this far, I'll finish, whatever it takes.

  [System display displays message "Seduce him"] 

  Grant Ward : [Gulps nervously]  Help.

• Grant Ward : I only get one shot. And it has to knock a person back, as well as out.

  Leo Fitz : Which is why we're perfecting this little beauty:

  [Holds up his latest stun-gun] 

  Leo Fitz : .45-caliber cartridges, semi-automatic. Each mag Contains eight therapeutic rounds of dendrotoxin.

  Jemma Simmons : In case you miss!

  [Ward gives her a look] 

  Jemma Simmons : Or have multiple assailants.

  Leo Fitz : Yeah, we're gonna have this new night-night pistol working in no time.

  Grant Ward : Okay? - Great. One thing: we're not calling it that.

  Jemma Simmons : [to Fitz]  Ah, told you.

  Leo Fitz : [Slightly dejectedly]  Yes, we yes, we are.

• Skye : What do we have to do if we have to pee?

  Grant Ward : You broke protocol because you need a bathroom break?

  Skye : It was a really, really long drive, and everyone's nervous.

  Grant Ward : There's a container at the bottom of the blue chest.

  Skye : [Searches chest]  Not the water bottle.

  Grant Ward : Yes.

  Skye : Did you never learn the thing where girl parts and boy parts are different and our parts are not penises?