- [Nadia Simons, a wine connoisseur, is giving her verdict at a tasting of Carnarvon Estate's new wine]
- Nadia Simons: Ladies and gentlemen. I have tasted some great English wines in my time... Unfortunately this is not one of them. It's cloyingly sweet with no discernible complexity of flavour. I suppose I'd drink it at a wedding but I certainly wouldn't insult the bride by toasting her with it.
- William Carnarvon: Good heavens, how can you say that?
- Nadia Simons: Sorry, William. Better luck next time.
- Ryan Carnarvon: [Matilda Stowe suddenly collapses] Grandma, grandma!
- Diana Carnarvon: Mum, mum.
- William Carnarvon: Matilda, you all right? ,
- [many of the guests collapse]
- Nadia Simons: [drily, to herself] Everyone's a critic!
- DS Charlie Nelson: How did the slug pellets get in the wine?
- Kate Wilding: We opened five random bottles but found no trace in the wine itself.
- DS Charlie Nelson: Five bottles! Just another weeknight for you then.
- Kate Wilding: But we found traces in some of the glasses, from one particular box, which explains why only some of the party-goers were affected.
- DS Charlie Nelson: And the glasses were on loan from a local hotel. I'll speak to the owner.
- Kate Wilding: I'll get the full report to you by the end of day. I'll put it on your desk if I can find it in my drunken stupor.
- DS Charlie Nelson: Midsomer Vinae is a village of unreliable witnesses, apparently. The hit and run statements don't exactly stand up to scrutiny.
- DCI John Barnaby: If we could rely on the public, you and I would be out of a job.
- [first lines]
- Kevin Paynton: Mr Carnarvon.
- William Carnarvon: Kevin, I can see a lot of empty glasses; please make sure that everyone's topped up. Good lad.
- Kevin Paynton: Absolutely. Thank you.
- William Carnarvon: Thank you.