Time Squad (TV Series)

Napoleon the Conquered/Confucius Say... Way Too Much (2001)

Mark Hamill: Larry 3000

Quotes 

• [Larry sees Tuddrussel beating the microwave and gives a mincing yelp] 

  Larry 3000 : What on Earth are you doing?

  Buck Tuddrussel : I'm teaching this dang thing a lesson!

  Larry 3000 : This "thing" is a kitchen appliance, you brute! We've got feelings, too, you know!

  [He strokes the beaten microwave] 

  Larry 3000 : Oh, you poor little fellow. Did he hurt you?

• Larry 3000 : Think of time as a section of rope. As Earth moves forward through time, more rope is formed. Recently it was discovered that as time grew older, it began to decay, or "unravel," as it were, and this disintegration of the past begins to create disastrous results in our future. Let's say that because of this instability in the past, the dodo bird never becomes extinct, and because of this, a young Henry Ford is attacked by one of these filthy creatures. He is so traumatized by the experience that he never invents the auto assembly line, or the Model T. Without this primitive automobile as a jumping-off point, we in the future are suddenly without our fancy solar-powered hover cars. That's why we have to constantly repair the past and keep our future strong.

• Otto Osworth : Larry, quick, tell him we're sorry!

  [Larry clears his throat] 

  Larry 3000 : [in French]  My venerable Emperor, I beg you kindly...

  Napoleon Bonaparte : [in French]  No!

  [He whistles for his men] 

  Larry 3000 : [in French]  Believe me, Your Excellence...

  [the Time Squad are surrounded by bayonets] 

  Larry 3000 : Oh, forget it.