Animal Crackers (2017)

Gilbert Gottfried: Mario Zucchini

Photos 

Quotes 

• Mario Zucchini : Okay - who has a cactus room in their house?

• Mario Zucchini : [skidding on his motorcycle]  Mamma mia!

  Mario Zucchini : [dodges a truck]  Papa pia!

  Mario Zucchini : [goes flying off the road]  ZUCCHINI'S GONNA DIE-ARI...!

  [lands in a manure pile] 

• Chesterfield : [looking in the box]  Always hard to find - like love, Waldo, a good Chinese restaurant... Ah-ha!

  [pulls out a human shaped cracker] 

  Owen : [in bear form]  Wait a minute - is that me?

  Mario Zucchini : That is you!

  Owen : In jeans!

  Owen , Mario Zucchini : Tight jeans.

  Chesterfield : It is you! Yessir - every time you eat an animal cookie, a human cookie appears in the box! To change back, you just eat it! Pretty good, huh?

  Owen : You want me to eat... me?

  Chesterfield : [holding up the cookie, high-pitched voice]  Look at me! I'm Owen! My pants are high!

  [low voice] 

  Chesterfield : My IQ is low.

  Owen : Hey!

  Chesterfield : Is for horses! Which you could turn into if you eat this one!

  [holds up horse cracker] 

  Mario Zucchini : Okay, so, how do these things work?

  Chesterfield : Gypsy curse, stale flower, radioactive sugar mites, who knows, who cares? It's magic! That's why the box always stays full!

  Owen : [struggles to pick the cookie up in his bear claws]  Okay, so I just... pick... little cookie-me up... and... um...

  Chesterfield : [tosses it in his mouth]  Down the hatch!

  [Owen changes back] 

  Owen : I'm me!

  Chesterfield : For better or worse! Mostly worse. In your case... definitely worse.